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    #76
    July Mod Squad

    All the best on your continued journey, SaraSmiles.

    :l

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      #77
      July Mod Squad

      Sarasmiles,
      A very good book to purchase (paperback available) or borrow from the library is Susan Powter's book, "Sober and staying that way". You will find a ton of information that will be extremely helpful. I don't think any modder will deny the fact that it IS a lot of work to moderate. It is ok to vacillate, we are here for you with whatever decision you make for yourself.
      :l
      Eve11
      "Control your destiny or somebody else will"

      ~Jack Welsh~:h

      God grant me the serenity to accept the people I cannot change, the courage to change the one I can, and the wisdom to know it's me. ~Author unknown, :thumbs:

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        #78
        July Mod Squad

        Hello, Moders!

        You may have seen my posts, primarily in the Newbies Nest, where I have be villified for talking about my fears that a certain long planned glass of wine a few days after the soon to come birth of my twins might lead me back to drinking. I am on day 10 of a 30 day (initial) goal of AF, and ultimately will test out the moderation route. I'm doing this for my family, and because I know I cannot go on drinking the way I was. Especially with twins coming (and I'm no spring chicken at 5-0!!)

        It really pissed me off that so many could rip me for sharing my feelings. I know they all meant well, but the posts were along the lines of "you're a shitty dad for thinking about having that drink if it might lead you back to heavy drinking." Not the kind of support I need, and kind of shocked at some of the "holier than thou" type attitudes of long time posters that still hang in the Newbies Nest.

        Anyway, with that rant off my chest, I hope everyone is doing well and achieving your various goals. BTW, Eve, I caddied for Jack Welsh, a whole lot, over about 5 summers as a kid. Did you know he overcame a serious speach impediment right at the time he was named Chairman of GE?

        Back to work for me. Wish me well on day 10 AF....

        Dave
        Well the 1st are the hardest days don't you worry anymore.
        When life looks like easy street there is danger at your door.

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          #79
          July Mod Squad

          Hi everyone,
          Thought I'd poke my head in for a bit to say I am alive and doing well. :hallo: Welcome to all the new modders; DancingGirl, Library Girl, DfromCT(congrats on your soon to be twins. How exciting). Good luck to Sarasmiles. If you ever need some encouragement, please stop by. We support no matter what path you choose. Please forgive if I have forgotten anyone new. I am terrible at remembering all those who have joined us. And a big hello to the oldies but goodies; TMH, Eve, FF, Trixie.

          I have been reading on and off but haven't been posting. I am pretty much still sticking to my same modding goals. No AL on the week days and modding on the weekends. BUT went to Georgia to a lake house my sister rented and I ended up drinking a bottle of wine a night. :wow: I NEVER do that! I was disgusted with myself. There were no boundaries and most everyone was doing the same but I really over did it. I felt like sh*t every morning and it ruined the days; not being able to canoe and such. Came home and did ok then just got back from Colorado yesterday. I did pretty well there. Totally different atmosphere. I also learned that if I just drink beer I do so much better. Friday night I over did it with beer and margaritas but the rest of the time I only had beer and did not wake up with a hangover. I am thinking maybe wine just isn't my thing anymore and I should probably stay away from it. But I had such a wonderful time. Climbed a 9,000 ft mountain and did really well. Was visiting my cousins and they are young and hip and have such an active life. There is so much to do there. It reminded me of Hawaii when we lived there. Everyone stays outside doing all sorts of things and they are all so laid back. My kind of place. If I didn't have to come back to my hubby I would have stayed there.

          Hubby is retiring in 2 weeks. Yikes! Our lives will definitely be changed. I'm pretty nervous about it and I know he is too. He is only 51 and this is a forced retirement situation. He would keep on working if he could. He is looking for something else but who knows if he will find anything. We are fine if he doesn't but I am worried about him getting bored and my sanity having him home all of the time. :H I think we will take sailing lessons. We live only 5 minutes from the Chesapeake Bay and we don't use it as much as we should. It is such a beautiful body of water and I love being around it. If we don't do that we may buy kayaks and paddle down the tributaries. I want to start doing some serious travelling so maybe it will be ok if we just stay busy. But it is sooooo hot here and it becomes difficult to be outside. That's why I love Colorado. Cool temps.

          I know what you mean TMH about not having those deep conversations with hubby while having drinks. I used to love doing that and he really doesn't drink much anymore. When I was in Colorado he didn't have one drink! (It was a girls vacation). Wish I could be that way. Great job btw on your AFness. You really seem to have a good handle on it.

          And yes, LG and Stewarts, I know what you mean about the Newbies Nest. I felt the same way in there. I initially thought it was for anyone who either wanted to mod or go AF. Only to find out if you want to mod you better leave. Sad.

          Well, enough of my rambling. Have you all stopped reading by the second paragraph. :H Well, it HAS been awhile. I'll try to be a little more consistent in posting. It's so nice to see everyone doing so well and being in control of their modding.
          Take care all,
          MM
          "What's so funny 'bout peace, love and understanding." Elvis Costello

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            #80
            July Mod Squad

            Well, I've been quite bust (mostly professionally) so I have missed you all. D fromt CT, don't worry about the NN. There are WAY too many judgmental people there. I was like you, I was simply sharing my feelings are tryint to figure out what I wanted to do and the same thing. I know LG also had a similiar situation.

            Sarasmiles, good luck to you. You know best what is good for you, and it sounds like you made a good choice. I think anytime we "crave" something, unless its hunger related, can be a warning sign....I've had this as well in the past. About 8 months ago, I noticed going to me club after my workouts, runs, etc. to the tap room (bar/restaurant), drinking a beer and actually "craving more" I mean, I was thinking about the next one, before I took two sips of the first! I was in bad place stil with the divorce and working out dehydrates you, so, you do physically crave liquid to an extent, but this was different. Anyway, it did subside, but I had to work at it like eveyone else.

            LOl, someone before mentioned my life being "complicated". I'm not sure I would totally agree, but after last night, I'd say so. It is not alcohol related, so I don't feel it necessary to get into that part of my life...Good luck all this week. I am about to go meet an old friend and now, it looks like a client, for a drink in the Village....I'm sure I'll mod okay...marathon training in the heat, tends to, well, for some odd reason fill you up after a meal (I still feel quite full from the little wrap I had for lunch).

            br

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              #81
              July Mod Squad

              Hello everyone MM invited me over to this thread............ MOD for means NO MORE LIQUOR - a couple cold beers is all I wanna get back to...... So today after work I am going to try my HARDEST not to stop at the store.... Wish me luck
              And it's hard to dance with a devil on your back so shake him off ~ Florence and the Machine

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                #82
                July Mod Squad

                Good luck vlivengood. Have you posted in other threads? Just curious about your "story".

                Well, I guess I had another run-in in the Nest, trying to defend D. I think it's best if I just quit posting over there like I said I would. Clearly, modding is a touchy subject that makes some abstainers see red, lol.

                I got another book in the mail to review for Library Journal, and have been reading it some today. Other than that, working and waiting for 5 pm, lol. Hope everyone has a great afternoon/night/morning!

                Thanks MM for checking in!

                LG


                "I like people too much or not at all."
                Sylvia Plath

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                  #83
                  July Mod Squad

                  posted in a few others - Im 35 good job, happily married, wonderful 18 year old son head to college at UNR this fall - My entire life i have had no problem having a few beers after work then about 2 years ago I went on strict diet and hit the gym and lost a ton of weight, started missing the relaxed feeling of a few evening beers but did not want the calories so I took a shot of vodka and would sip a lit beer, well that got outta hand............. now I just want to get back to having a few lite beers - I just need NOT to stop at liquor store after work - quitten time in 45m, wish me luck
                  And it's hard to dance with a devil on your back so shake him off ~ Florence and the Machine

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                    #84
                    July Mod Squad

                    Good luck then. I don't think I could moderate until I had a period of abstinence, which I did, but some here have had success. I had to quit the daily drinking altogether for 30 days and then some. I don't want to go back to it, and only want to drink on non-working days and not even every weekend or at least not every weekend night. The 30+ days of abstinence helped me to find other ways to relax in the evenings, and now I don't automatically think of having a drink when I come home, or stopping by the liquor store. You have to do what works for you though, but just sharing my own experience.


                    "I like people too much or not at all."
                    Sylvia Plath

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                      #85
                      July Mod Squad

                      Hi everyone,

                      Been pretty quiet while my daughter is on holidays, she flies out tomorrow, so back to normality, which I am looking forward to.

                      So nice to see new peeps here, and you can pretty much say what you want here about AL, we aren't judgmental on this thread, which is why we hang out here.

                      I had a few too many last night and I'm suffering for it today, but back on the wagon and it'll be an AF day for me today. Started off with wine yesterday arvo - WRONG.

                      MightyMite, I am thinking the same, in fact I know I should stay away from Champers and wine, both are my poison and once I start on them, I rarely stop - but at least we have realised that.

                      Vlivengood, I hope you made it past the liquor store - a hardy at the best of times - stay strong.

                      DfromCT - you are most welcome here and I'm glad you hung around and found this thread.

                      To all the others Sarasmiles, Eve, TMH, LG, Stewarts, DG and FF (hope I didn't forget anyone) great to hear you are all doing well and I'm so glad we all have each other to whinge, bitch or shout our successes to - no-one understands like you lot.
                      Time to whip AL's Ass :b&d:
                      :h ya
                      Trix

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                        #86
                        July Mod Squad

                        Crap.... I stopped but instead of pint got half pint..... Feel weak really can not get past voice in head on the ride home...... I am a strong woman... But this makes me feel weak
                        And it's hard to dance with a devil on your back so shake him off ~ Florence and the Machine

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                          #87
                          July Mod Squad

                          So glad I found this site though... I am drinking much less tonight and have some hope now and feel like not lying to u guys is a big step in the right direction
                          And it's hard to dance with a devil on your back so shake him off ~ Florence and the Machine

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                            #88
                            July Mod Squad

                            Hi all and thanks for the welcome! I've probably pissed off some more of the old regime in the NN, and might be exiled to this thread. I'm. Wrapping up day 10 AF, with a goal of at least 30, probably going further. At some point I'll try moderation, but know I'm not ready yet. I also know that the NN this past 24 hours made me think about how nice a dozen Heinekens and a pint of Caramena might go down, rather than focus on my goals. Might be better off avoiding the nest for a while.

                            Good luck to all, and good night

                            Dave
                            Well the 1st are the hardest days don't you worry anymore.
                            When life looks like easy street there is danger at your door.

                            Comment


                              #89
                              July Mod Squad

                              vlivengood;1351371 wrote: Crap.... I stopped but instead of pint got half pint..... Feel weak really can not get past voice in head on the ride home...... I am a strong woman... But this makes me feel weak
                              Tomorrow is another day Vlivengood, try not to beat yourself up about it, easy to say I know, but yes finding this site is a step in the right direction AND you only got half of what you normally would :goodjob:

                              DfromCT - congrats on day 10 AF, that's awesome. I moderate but haven't done the AF days much at all, so well done.

                              I won't be drinking tonight though because I had way too much last night :upset: but as I said to Vlivengood, tomorrow is another day and I will begin again - as I always do. Would love to be a 'normal drinker' (as we all say) whatever that is and not have to fight this shit of a demon inside my head, but I'm not, so I just have to deal with it.
                              Time to whip AL's Ass :b&d:
                              :h ya
                              Trix

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                                #90
                                July Mod Squad

                                Trix, thanks for all the encouragement.... Getting very motivated. Did not drink too much.... Remember entire evening with hubby.... Was able to say good night and go up to bed at 9:30... Hubby came up at 12:30 and was actually able to wake me for luvins.... In garage now having smoke... Searching thru phone no calls in log I don't recall no texts I can't believe I sent...... Having some water but no need for the ibprofin..... Gunna head back to bed.... Tomorrow is another day and I hope it's one where I CAN pass the store up!!!!!! Thanx again!!!!!!
                                And it's hard to dance with a devil on your back so shake him off ~ Florence and the Machine

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