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    #46
    Moderate May!

    Thank you for posting that Eve! I know I have to change my mindset to think of the weekends differently. Like you, I am finding it very easy to say no on weekdays but my mind plays tricks on me come Friday night. I hate it! I am still trying to keep it at a moderate level (for me) even if I do drink on the weekend. I used to go no holds barred starting at 4:00 on Fridays. I am going to try to implement a new rule of no drinking at home. My husband and I socialize quite a bit, but we certainly do not go out every weekend. I know it takes a while to form a new habit, so I am determined to do this! I read so much on this site and it has helped me change my mindset tremendously.

    Lasha, I understand exactly how you feel. I went to dinner with friends last night and they were all drinking and I abstained. I could tell they really did not know how to handle that. I have never been the girl to not knock back a few beers during happy hour. I certainly didn't want to make them uncomfortable, but I wanted to stick with my plan so badly and not feel bad about myself today. Made it a little easier since they were drinking margaritas and that is not my drink....if they had been drinking beer I think that would have made it harder to abstain. Makes me realize how much others associated me with drinking. I guess I never thought anyone else thought anything about it since all my friends drink, but I guess birds of a feather.....I am sure I won't be invited out as much, but that is just the price I have to pay to change my lifestyle.

    Hope everyone has a great holiday weekend and be safe! My anniversary is tomorrow and we are headed to the casino....going to be a tricky weekend. I gave up soda a few months ago, think I am going to allow myself some Dr Pepper to keep me from getting out of control. The sugar should halt my cravings (hopefully!)

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      #47
      Moderate May!

      HI, Everyone! Happy Friday.
      I was reading on the General Board that some folks look at this weekend as a big challenge... a temptation to party that will be hard to overcome. Hmmm... thought I would share my own view, which is certainly not sacrosanct, just another view.

      Here is the US it is Memorial Day. This was originally started to honor the dead of WWI, and then also honor the veterans of that war - the war to end all wars. And because we are human, not saints, we had another war, then another and then way too many wars. And so we set aside a weekend to honor the veterans and the lost of ALL wars.

      To me and mine, it is a solemn weekend. Will I be having a glass of wine tonight? Probably. But tomorrow I will visit the cemeteries and place huge bunches of lilacs on the graves of my loved ones, and I will remember.

      If you have served in your country's armed forces, please allow me to thank you for your service. War is incredibly expensive, and believe me, I am NOT speaking money here. I value you and your sacrifices, and those of your family. May there someday come a time when we do not do this to each other, to ourselves.

      Comment


        #48
        Moderate May!

        nonamegirl;1510065 wrote: If you have served in your country's armed forces, please allow me to thank you for your service. War is incredibly expensive, and believe me, I am NOT speaking money here. I value you and your sacrifices, and those of your family. May there someday come a time when we do not do this to each other, to ourselves.
        https://sphotos-b.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-snc6/q71/s480x480/248047_2535https://sphotos-b.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-snc6/q71/s480x480/248047_253550448116094_562995697_n.jpg50448116094_ 562995697_n.jpg

        Well said noname.

        This picture shows my sentiments exactly.

        Be safe everyone!

        :l
        Eve11
        "Control your destiny or somebody else will"

        ~Jack Welsh~:h

        God grant me the serenity to accept the people I cannot change, the courage to change the one I can, and the wisdom to know it's me. ~Author unknown, :thumbs:

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          #49
          Moderate May!

          Hi Modders
          I hope you are all having a relaxing weekend! I am, pretty much. I am going to try and be here regularly.
          Last night I had about 5 drinks, none tonight, I seem to go back and forth on thinking its fine, and then not. I think one drink a night is good and healthy.
          I am more and more thinking I really have a problem with anxiety, and alcohol is just a great short term, bad idea way of handling it. I am getting into relaxing herbs, kava, valerian, 5 htp. Thinking about getting on Prozac or something, I am not really the meditation type.
          Any fellow GAD people here?
          Agreed, nonamegirl, to all you said. Thank you, armed forces.
          L

          Comment


            #50
            Moderate May!

            RingingCedars;1509677 wrote: Hey Modders, Modders want to bees and those in the cheap seats as a favourite MWO'er would say!
            Just gave another MWO'er, kind enough to inquire, an RC 2013 Report and thought I'd post it here too.
            RC 2013 Report:
            shared bottle wine January 14 birthday
            shared bottle March 29
            6 beer May 2
            1 beer another day in May....forgot to mark down
            all other days ZERO!
            Keep setting goals and moving forward folks!
            Sorry to just jump in your thread without properly introducing myself on the mods board! I just saw this post from RingingCedars and it has given me some real hope that moderation can be done!

            When I joined MWO, I was drinking a bottle of wine almost every night. It started to affect my sleep, skin and I was too hungover a lot of the time so knew it was time to reduce and evaluate! I read that you should start with 30 days AF which at first seemed like quite a challenge but I am now on day 27 and feeling great. These 27 days have given me time to recover physically and realise that my big drinking days are over (I could drink like a fish when going out to a party or whatever). Don't want them - I want to close the door on that part of my life... BUT.. It was never my intention to completely cut alcohol out of my life! At first, I though I would keep it to weekends but since this period of abstinence, I realise I don't need to drink in any pattern or that frequently so I am now thinking about holidays, Christmas etc. Not binge drinking - just being able to partake in similar quantities RC indicates above.

            I have noticed that moderating is completely discouraged on the main boards.. I understand the reasons why as people can't stop when they start and have very strong alcohol cravings (I haven't suffered any cravings to speak of or any withdrawal symptoms since going AF).

            I still want to get another 33 days AF under my belt so that I can really make an informed decision but am happy to see that it is possible to drink moderately when you have previously had a history of overdoing it! :l
            AF since Halloween 2016

            Trying to kill my Wine Witch! :smileyb:

            Comment


              #51
              Moderate May!

              Hi Wine-no,

              Being a moderator is not as hard as abstaining but is still very hard and you must keep count of all your drinks BUT if you can do it it's great. Having a couple of drinks and a good time without the hangover and regrets is something I find hard to stop doing.

              Apart from a serious blip after my world went upside down for various reasons I've been modding now for 10 years after 2 months abstaining but beware it's got to be controlled.

              Happy modding all.
              It's not what you drink, it's how much!

              Comment


                #52
                Moderate May!

                Hi folks. Read now and then, haven't been posting as much. I'm A-okay, sticking to 2 most nights and stick in an AF day more frequently. Now as we get a little more hot & humid I find I need to be more careful because of the dehydration effects of alcohol. Conscious effort to get my water in during day and while I am having a couple.

                NNG, agree with your sentiments and agree with Eve, well said.

                Hi Lila! Coming up your way later this month. Work on warming it up, ok?

                Hi Wine-o, Texas, and RC. Love to have you here.

                Hey, Lash, I didn't realize you had been modding 10 yrs. Great to hear it can be maintained like that. Like your tagline too!

                Have a great Tuesday. Been out for a brisk 2 mile walk, now off to play 18 holes.

                TMH
                The pain of discipline is less than the pain of regret.

                Comment


                  #53
                  Moderate May!

                  Hello, all my friends.
                  I am glad to see such good comments on this thread. We are a lovely bunch of people, I think. Wine-no, Lila, HI!:welcome:

                  Lasha, I also did not realize you have been moderating for ten years. You are my role model! Hope your week goes well, and that your wife is doing better.

                  Eve, thanks for your comments. Always, you are marvelous!

                  TMH, have fun on the golf course. The walking is my favorite exercise... but I have never even held a golf club in my hands (if you don't count miniature golf as a kid.)

                  Had another weekend at my parents' home. We are close to being done with the clean up, and now I just want to drag my feet and not get done so that we don't actually have to put it on the market. Oh, well. I guess I will live through this, too.

                  Comment


                    #54
                    Moderate May!

                    Hi all,
                    TMH, yes, the weather. Supposed to be summer! Well, my hydrangeas must be loving this constant rain! Nng, putting a house on the market? I don't envy you at all. But I really think the market's picked up a lot.
                    Just checking in. Modding at 2 drinks a night for now. Tired, working too much. Can't wait to work on my yard. Can't wait til Friday!
                    Abbers vs. Modders? My advice, live and let live in this little section of the boards!
                    L
                    L

                    Comment


                      #55
                      Moderate May!

                      Hi happy modders,

                      Great news! My wife has agreed to start taking her medication.

                      I've had to read up on P.S. and the effect it has on people, my wife luckily has the mild form and a little pill every day keeps it at bay, simple. Along with 75% of sufferers, and she is the mildest 10 % of them, can be treated and live a normal life. The person who experimented and invented the cure deserves a medal. I wish there was a pill that explains that to the sufferers as they all think they are fine without it.
                      Before this breakthrough in medication Britain was covered in mental homes that were hidden away and now most are shut.

                      NNG and TMH, Yeah I stopped drinking when I was 40 after chucking up blood, I new I would die if I didn't but after a couple of months hated it so much decided to just drink moderately. Things went really well for 8 years until my life went upside down, lost my Dad and Sister within 4 months and of course my wife was admitted into a mental home.
                      Started drinking bid time to escape from depression and stumbled across MWO last year, didn't know there was other modders out there.
                      Now back on my feet, just got to keep on top of things, I must admit it helps having encouragement from MWO friends and look I didn't start drinking big time again after this little episode (thats what they call it).
                      We're going to work on the vegetable plot today and looks like good weather for the weekend.

                      Happy modding
                      Lash
                      It's not what you drink, it's how much!

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