I don't want to be totally AF......,

[frances]

Thanks Alpro. I know that most with alcohol trouble need to stop completely. I have to admit I never thought this could work for me but here I am.

With regard to your last sentence - this section of this site is for people who want to change their drinking - it is not for people who are starting out as moderate or normal drinkers, so I don't think that has anything to do with why this section is inactive. My guess is that the inactivity itself deters some. I don't know the history but some folks who may have been here in the past apparently have had issues with AF v. mod debates causing problems - maybe that's why they aren't here. Others may have decided to go AF or to leave, who knows.

I wish it was more active but if everyone has decided to go AF and that is why it isn't, then I'm truly happy for them. Nothing at all wrong with being AF and it's probably the best choice for the vast majority.

[ToMyHealth]

Want to check in and put out there I am going for some serious AF time. 30 days is my goal.
Vikings/packers play tonight and yep, you guessed it. Invited to a house pizza party. And the host told dh he has a present for me. What you want to bet it's chardonnay. ((Sigh))
If it is, it will keep. Have had O'Douls with pizza before and will be carting some along tonite.
As far as this thread goes, I wish we weren't quite so vague with our lives re: alcohol. I wish we were more open with both our successes and our struggles. I appreciate you, Frances, for giving us a good example. Now does that mean we all can do as well? Maybe not, but we strive to get better, change our habits, and if down the road like it was for Eve aka Addy we just need to stop, so be it!

TMH
Day 2

[ToMyHealth]

Happy to say I not only made it through the evening AF, I enjoyed myself. We left after half time. I am not worrying about not sleeping as I have in the past. If I can't sleep, I get up and watch tv or read & if I can take a nap the next day, I do.

From what I understand, alcohol leaves your system by Day 3.

TMH
Day 3

[frances]

TMH - Happy New Year! Good for you for setting your goal and for reaching day 3! :welldone: Keep up the good work! It definitely gets easier, especially after the first couple of weeks.

I'm glad you brought up talking more about AL here - I've had the same thought. I'm in a good place and my goal is to keep my drinking very infrequent. Jane from this site suggested a term for me (and at the time another moderator) - it was "abstinence-based moderation". I like that! I like drinking infrequently and keeping a couple of weeks or so in between times when I do drink. I'm very afraid that if I do any more than that then I will start to obsess about it again and might start caving to those thoughts. Thankfully that hasn't happened and I'm doing very well sticking with my new routine of seltzer or tea.

But as I've mentioned before I do wonder how I will do if I ever get into more frequent socializing. Lately socializing is so infrequent I can nearly drink any time those events come up (just one or two drinks). For example, I had dinner with my mom and brother on new years day - no need to have wine but I did it anyway. No big deal and yes, I'm doing great but I don't want to drink every time it's there in a social situation. I need to say no in some of those situations too. I know you socialize a lot TMH and that's one of the things that makes we wonder how I would do if that were me. I guess time will tell.

[frances]

Oh yes and on a lighter note I totally binge watched Nurse Jackie over the weekend - finished season 1 and into season 2! Did a lot of laundry and took Christmas decorations down and a few other small things while I watched. I really am enjoying it. Has anyone else seen it? It shows some great insight into addiction (pills) and I like that each episode is only ~30 minutes.

[actiongirl46]

Hi All - I've been here for a year mainly in Newbies Nest with lots of ups and downs. Frances, I think my goal is very similar to yours. I'm not sure yet. My first goal is to string together some AF days this month. I did 14 in December, including Christmas, then had a few over last week on vacation (but daily), now on Day 2. I do not have the feck its and don't plan on getting them.

I read an interesting article comparing addiction treatment to diabetes/asthma, etc. They were talking about long term management in diabetes/asthma, not necessarily having an expectation of perfection. Hmm . . .

I am starting to binge watch Nurse Jackie too!! Good stuff!! I'm only on Season 1 though . . .

[ToMyHealth]

Good morning! Hi Actiongirl. Welcome! I have watched all of Nurse Jackie, waiting for new season to start.
Attempted workout yest but almost fell off treadmill. Finally called dr. To see what the heck is going on with this dizziness. Playing golf, then afternoon appt.
got through our normal at home Happy Hour drinking tonic water with a shot of cranberry juice. No issues.

TMH
Day 4

[actiongirl46]

TMH - I like your tag line!! "The pain of discipline is less than the pain of regret" very nice.

[frances]

Hi everyone - sounds like you're doing great TMH - I hope you can figure out the dizziness! Good for you for working out though - I'm so sedentary it's pathetic. Luckily I have genes that allow me to stay relatively thin even so - but I feel less 'strong' these days and would like to workout to feel more fit.

And welcome to you Actiongirl! Glad to see you here. Hopefully we can all help each other stay on track! I'm sitting here with my jasmine tea after a long 10+ hour day at work today. Enjoying it and looking forward to a relaxing evening even though I should probably clean up, I just might skip that tonight! I've seen all of Season 1 and 2 now of Nurse Jackie. ready to start season 3!

I think that addiction has many different 'varieties' and the best 'treatment' will be different depending on the person's specific situation. I guess it depends on how you define 'perfection' - but I I think that, for everyone, that doesn't necessarily have to mean total and complete abstinence 100% of the time. But for many, it does.

[actiongirl46]

Frances, I agree. I also am humble enough and new enough to know I have A LOT to learn about myself so that will be my main focus . . . I feel so fortunate for the support here and with my hubby and friends.

TMH, I just joined a gym in December. Was off to a great start but then came the holidays, vacation, blah blah! Now I'm on my third day of a horrible head cold/cough. So . . . I'll have to get back to it later this week. I'm looking forward to it though because when I was drinking I could never "make time" for the gym or when I did I didn't work very hard because I was so "tired". No wonder I gained 20 pounds in the last 1 1/2 years!! I like to exercise and that is one thing AL took from me. I'm excited to get that back. Turning 50 didn't help either!!!

Nice to be here and I'll check in tomorrow. Have a great Wednesday - I'm hoping for a clear head, not from AL withdrawl (no drinks here) but from congestion- ugh!! Onward!

[ToMyHealth]

Good day. Couldn't believe how tired I got playing golf. Cold and very windy. None of us did very well. Dr. Is suspecting low Vit B levels. I normally take a Super B Complex but have gotten out of habit. Both my grandfather and my sister had/have to get Vit B shots. Sister gives them to herself. No thanks. Pass me the supplements. Lab tests next.

Thanks, Actiongirl, on tagline compliment. Feel free to use it. Keep at it at the gym...soon as you feel better.

Frances, aren't you lucky! Being thin. Yet we do have to keep,our bones, muscles strong. I had osteopenia (hips) which turned into osteoporosis after having chemo. Taking generic fosamax and have turned it around to "mild osteopenia". At this age I have turned into my mother with the fear of falling. It really is scary, ladies, how all of a sudden one day you realize you are just like your mother . Except mine rarely drank! Bless her soul.

Happy Hump Day. Bible Study then on way to hospital for my volunteer shift. Make it a good one.

TMH
Day 5

[blue1]

happy to say i not only made it through the evening af, i enjoyed myself. We left after half time. I am not worrying about not sleeping as i have in the past. If i can't sleep, i get up and watch tv or read & if i can take a nap the next day, i do.

From what i understand, alcohol leaves your system by day 3.

Tmh
day 3

yayyyyyy.....go tmh....keep up the good work!!!!!

[blue1]

HAPPY NEW YEAR EVERYBODY!!!
I'm going to try this again....I just lost a long post!

I want to thank you guys for keeping this thread going while I was nursing my mourning wounds. I started this thread because I didn't know where I fit on this site anymore. This thread is here to support you where you are....not to judge you on your journey. YOUR JOURNEY!

I'm so glad everyone is doing so well!
I've been doing good at modding so far this year. I'm not feeling as sad about my sister and I think that's helping.

REMEMBER WE ARE HERE TO SUPPORT YOU IF YOU DON'T DRINK ANY OR IF YOU DRINK TOO MANY!!!

Welcome to you new guys....hope everyone is having a successful day!!!

Better stop here lol...before I lose this post lol....

[frances]

Hi all and good to see you Blue! I'm also glad to see everyone doing so well!

Mom got her chest CT scan today so I'm anxious to hear what the results are - I hope the drug she is taking is killing the cancer - she is doing so much better now and if she gets good results I'm sure that will help her get it off her mind (me too!)

Quick check in during a busy day at work...stay strong everyone!

[actiongirl46]

Hi all - Golf in the cold doesn't sound like too much fun . . . hopefully it will warm up for you!

Frances, let us know how your Mom does, that sounds very stressful.

I am FINALLY feeling better today but wouldn't you know the old cravings hit me hard around the witching hour. I was able to surf the urge by watching some bad TV but boy was I cranky. My poor teenagers. And hubby. Dog didn't seem to notice.

I think my trigger was boredom as I work from home. I think I need to get out more. I'm definitely going to the gym tomorrow! Have a great Thursday all - AG