AF Daily, Friday, Dec. 5

[AAthlete]

AF Daily, Friday, Dec. 5

I agree Britt. I used to be so ashamed of myself and now I can accept who and what I am.

Fun fun putting up the decorations, and keep up the great work Cy.

[startingover]

AF Daily, Friday, Dec. 5

I can accept it myself, but I have only told two people in my world...not sure if that makes me ashamed of it or what. In some ways I am proud, because I am tackling it and my father never was able to.

[on my way]

AF Daily, Friday, Dec. 5

Some thing I've found strange. The people I have told tend to disagree with me. They'll say, no you're not. You never drank all the time. They have nooooo idea how much I consumed when I did drink, all or nothing I guess.

arrrgh, makes me want to barf thinking about it.

[momof3]

AF Daily, Friday, Dec. 5

AA, thanks for the clarification. This makes a lot more sense to me now.

I too have had enough "attempts" at modding to know that it is not or never will be a possibility for me.

[momof3]

AF Daily, Friday, Dec. 5

On My Way, I think that many of us still hold onto the notion that an alcoholic is a slobbering drunk who has hit rock bottom when I think in reality, most of us, at least on the surface, function fairly well.

Most of my drinking was done alone. If I had to go to a social function, I would drink lots before I went so I wouldn't be slinging them back so quickly when I was out. Very clever, eh? Not!

[SAUSAGE]

AF Daily, Friday, Dec. 5

Hi everyone

This is a busy thread today - lots of interesting posts - hope everyone is having a good (AF) day.

Some interesting things caught my eye when I read through it all

Firstly the "serenity prayer - about accepting the things you cannot change, changing the things you can and the wisdom to know the difference " this is a great prayer. I'm not particularly religious myself - my husband is, he has this on the wall at home - but it's a reallly uselful little prayer and helps me stop worrying about things - i'm a compulsive worrier!!

One day at a time - I like this too because you should just look at today - there's no point worrying about the past (which you cannot change) or the future - things that may never happen - just concentrate on the present " live for now"

I try to live by these - but it's not always easy!!

Will check back in later!

[on my way]

AF Daily, Friday, Dec. 5

Mom, I too rarely ever drank in public. If I did, it would have been 1 beer. (i don't like beer) I also would not drink and drive. I did my drinking later in the evening and at home. Sad, that drinking by yourself biz.

[on my way]

AF Daily, Friday, Dec. 5

Hi Sausage!! Glad you stopped in

[AAthlete]

AF Daily, Friday, Dec. 5

Me too. I would wait until afterward but then make up for lost time. Down to the basement I would go to 'watch' TV. I remember waking up at 2 or 3 am with the TV still on - wondering if I had anything left to drink...

[on my way]

AF Daily, Friday, Dec. 5

FUNNY, me too on the basement. Unless I need to clean I don't go down there any more.

[LVT25]

AF Daily, Friday, Dec. 5

I have been cleaning the basement today, and had a pretty strong urge to drink and smoke while at it. Amazing what the brain can do! I would put a 12 pack in the fridge down there, light a fire and drink, smoke, clean and organize.
I had to eat some lunch to make it go away!!

[SAUSAGE]

AF Daily, Friday, Dec. 5

I too did most of my drinking at home - the one or two people whom i have opened up to since trying to quit were totally bemused and said "but you don't have a problem, you hardly drank anything!?" because I hardly ever drank more than 1 or 2 units when I went out - they had no idea what I would drink at home when no-one was around. This is why , now when I go out socially, I don't find being Af that difficult, it's much more of a challenge when I am at home on my own.

[AAthlete]

AF Daily, Friday, Dec. 5

My wife was taking down wallpaper in the kitchen last week, and found an old vodka bottle that I had hidden up there. It was covered in dust and empty, but this time we could chuckle about it because she knows I am sober and has seen the change in me. Used to be I would be madly trying to think up a story to explain it away....

[momof3]

AF Daily, Friday, Dec. 5

Wow, I used to drink in bed in my bedroom. I would wake up around 2 or 3 am and often I would go downstairs to have another glass or two of wine to help me back to sleep. And all the while, I have these three precious children sleeping who completely trusted me for everything. How sad is that?

[Doggygirl]

AF Daily, Friday, Dec. 5

Hi again all! I totally love how the AF Daily thread has evolved. I love that we can all talk openly about our approach to sobriety - the areas where we are similar as well as the areas where we are different. At the end of the day, I sure end up with new and valuable ideas for my own "toolbox" and I hope everyone else does too. And of course there are folks who read this thread but don't post, and I am quite sure the collective wisdom here has impact beyond the currently active posters. YEAH!!!!!

On the Rational Recovery author's vitriol towards AA.... I have no idea if this is his issue or not, but the leader of my SMART face to face group has much frustration not "at" AA, but at the LEGAL community first, and medical community second, for the lack of any openess to recognize any other approach as valid. Things vary from state to state and locality to locality, but the sad part is that AA is not the "right" solution for everyone, and the folks who work to bring visibility to alternative approaches get tired of beating their heads against a very thick brick wall. Our group is small and one of the things we talk about from time to time is finding ways to make the SMART approach more visible as an option to the people who obvious need to stop drinking, especially where AA has not worked for them. I've yet to attend an AA meeting, so this is nothing negative about AA. And it's obvious that AA has been a huge asset to many people here at MWO. Just offering up one real life example of where some frustration comes from. In this case - it's not even towards AA, but towards a system that doesn't recognize anything other than AA as viable.

Cy, I think you are onto something here at Day 5 reflecting on the POSITIVE aspects of early sobriety. I'm sure the urges come and go with frequency - I think that's just part of it in the early days. But I DO believe that approaching this with a positive attitude can really help in the battle. There is MUCH to love about being sober! Good for you thinking about that.

Kap - congratulations on the new job. Now when will you be sharing some recipes???

Hello of course to everyone else who has posted!

Oh - on telling people I'm an alkie in whatever version of that I tell, I too find it very freeing. As MomO'3 said, many of us remained very functional and hid it well. So that just says to me that there are a lot more problem drinkers out there - probably suffering in silence as I did and I'm sure you all did - than we think. I've learned from the SMART group that it is only sheer luck that I'm NOT facing loss of license from DUI and those really serious problems. There are people digging out of HUGE holes who took far fewer risks than I did. So I do consider myself lucky in that regard.

Now I'm just doing random babble, but one of the business referral groups I belong to has a lawyer who usually gives a legal update about DUI's for everyone's benefit at this time of year. He will be speaking next week, and has said that Illinois (or maybe just our county) has some WAY stiffer penalties coming into play January 1. Funny - last year massive new non-smoking laws went into effect January 1 (no smoking in any public places or within X feet of any entrances, not even in bars!). I was glad I had already quit smoking last year. I think when I hear his presentation, I will be even more glad (if that's possible) that I finally quit drinking this year.

Anyway....I'm cooking a turkey this afternoon which was still frozen even after a week in the refrigerator. Thank goodness for the internet and hence, instructions what to do about that. I hope it turns out OK! It's a Mary's organic free range bird and I've heard they are good. I love being the holiday renegade making MY turkey on a non-holiday weekend! I'm also making a broccoli / mushroom / macadamia nut concoction instead of stuffing, and a baked thing using pumpkin and some pumpkin pie type spices and a few other ingredients and sugar free maple syrup with pecans on top instead of sweet potatoes. These are all new ventures, so I'll let you know if any of it is any good!

Happy AF Friday again. And thanks to all for sharing!

Oh - MomO3...I heard that things got really crazy around the board recently. I know that comes and goes. I only read or post in a very limited number of threads to stay away from it. So I don't know what the latest is. I just feel sad that people get hurt.

DG