Weekly AA Thread - Week of Oct. 12 - 18

[retteacher]

Hi Everyone: I'm just going to give this a quick start & then come back in a few minutes.

Mary

[retteacher]

Weekly AA Thread - Week of Oct. 12 - 18

I had my first ever AA get-together for a brunch today. There were only 6 of us, and it was really great. My husb & another spouse are not AAers but know enough about the program to join in quite enthusiastically. It was great to see these particular members in an informal setting. I feel that I've gone a long way in bonding w/them. My sponsor feels that hanging out w/other AA members outside of the meetings is part of the healing process.

Last night we went to dinner at a friend's home. Yes, there was a little wine served, but I didn't even feel a twinge of envy or tension. It's a valuable experience for me to be around non-alcoholics while they drink. They are very, very moderate: 1, 2 glasses at the most. At one point, the host had opened a nice bottle of pinot grigio which she said tasted "funny." She summarily poured it down the drain & opened another bottle that she deemed OK. I KNOW I would saved that funny bottle & drunk the whole thing later whether it tasted funny or not. Pouring wine down the drain was not an option.

I hope all is well w/everyone out there.

Love, Mary

[Doggygirl]

Weekly AA Thread - Week of Oct. 12 - 18

Hi Mary and thank you for kicking things off for us this week. I'm :H about the hostess pouring that wine down the drain. I'm with you - NEVER would anything that was already fermented go down the drain on my watch. Yep. I would have polished that bottle off later. Then switched right over to my "finest wine in a box." It is pretty amazing to watch normal drinkers. Your brunch today sounds fabulous. I'm also glad to hear your various reports showing the ways your husband is being supportive of you. Sounds like his little bit of denial is over too?? If so, I bet that has really enhanced your relationship now that you can be honest about everything. I was glad to read about your conversation with your son too. It all sounds very liberating Mary! I'm very happy for you.

WF, you raised a point at the end of last weeks thread that I think ties to something I was thinking about a lot the last couple of days. In our BB meeting on Saturday we finished reading Jim's story (p. 232). At first pass, it seemed I didn't have much in common with Jim beyond alcoholism. He was a black male physician dealing with his life and alcoholism in (I'm guessing) the 1930's. I'm a white female sales woman dealing with my life and alcoholism nearly 8 decades later. What could WE have in common? Well, here's a short list (besides being acoholic). And I bet I can add to it when I read the story again.

* Geographic running - we thought changing jobs / towns / etc. would "solve our problems."
* Failure to see alcohol at the root of the trouble long after that was obvious.
* Making promises to ourselves to ease our guilt, only to drink once the short lived "relief" from guilt set in. (he promises himself he will buy his baby a new dress and send the rest of the money home to his wife with his last bit of cash. Of course he ended up drinking that away)
* A LOOOONNNNNGGGGG slide to the bottom.

What really hit home is that I have something in common with EVERY alcoholic. Not just some alcoholics or most alcoholics. EVERY alcoholic. Somehow knowing and accepting that gives me a sense of gratitude that I am totally not alone with my problem, nor am I alone on the road to recovery. EVERY person I see on this path I have at least a little something in common with.

I was up early yesterday and I pulled up NPR Radio on the computer - I've never even listened to NPR before. I have no idea (HP??) what posessed me to think of that. But anyway...it was playing while I was doing my chiropractic exercises. Lo and behold, a recovery program came on. It was not specifically an "AA" program but they featured a speaker who was definitely an AAer based on the way he told his story. He described what we hear often - a tale of losing everything - job, house, family, car, etc. He said this: "I was living under a bush. But somehow I thought that was perfectly OK as long as I had cigarettes and alcohol." He went on to talk about how it took others to help him see exactly how bad his situation really was. Something about the way he told that made me realize that I too need others to help me see my own problems clearly. When I am quagmired in my own mess, I get confused about what the truth of the situation really is. I need objective insight from others who understand this journey to help me see my own situation clearly.

I remember the many comments over the years about my excessive drinking. No one ever sat me down "intervention style." But there were the one liners.... "Were you drinking when you did that?" "Boy you dirnk a lot." "You can keep up with the sailors." "Ask DG - she will know where the nearest bar is." This type of thing was not an every day occurance. But over the years, it happened a lot. Did I EVER take this as a warning about my drinking problem with a thought that I might need to stop??? NO. What my best thinking on my own got me was "I better do a better job hiding how much I drink." I suppose considering that, it's no wonder I ended up as a prisoner in my own home with my bottle for the last several years of my drinking career. I saw the comments as the problem, and drinking alone sure solved THAT problem.

Anyway, I have to run for now but I wanted to get that off my chest! I am thinking of everyone - hello to PP and Phil and Cindi and Corkish and WF and Okey and I know I am leaving out lots of people but hello one and all! More later...

Strength and hope,
DG

[gyco]

Weekly AA Thread - Week of Oct. 12 - 18

hi girls ive recently got back,from down south. states side. went thro many hotels. never found any rooms for friends of bill w,i dont beleive its about pouring it out,walk away, ? ,lets face it we would just go by more or go down stairs and get another bottle,if your going to aa meetings listen to the comments, teach, doggy lady,ive only been thro AA for 10 years,the preacher ? reflect lasts only for so long,there is more to the story,read betwen the lines,bill and bob had a larger view gyco

[gyco]

Weekly AA Thread - Week of Oct. 12 - 18

surprised there s not more people here

[gyco]

Weekly AA Thread - Week of Oct. 12 - 18

darn i got my sister inlaaw to read the 1st 164 pages and the n when she finished read bobs story

[Winefree]

Weekly AA Thread - Week of Oct. 12 - 18

Mary, so glad your get together went well.
DG, I had to go back to last weeks thread to see what I had said(senior moment) and then truly understood where you were coming from with the comparisons. You spelled it out perfectly, how we can connect to each reading in some way. That is why the BB is always amazing. Imagine how it is possible that some of those readings were written so very long ago, yet still pertain to alcoholics today. Hard to believe, but so true and sad to think about.

Finally started working on the steps with my sponsor. Procrastinating is one of my defects and I'm quite good at it.

Winefree

[Doggygirl]

Weekly AA Thread - Week of Oct. 12 - 18

Good morning! Hello Gyco - always good to see you. Now I can't even remember who it was (speaking of senior moments!) but someone recently gave a couple of tips for finding AA meetings when traveling in the US.

1) Ask a police officer or call the police station (non-emergency). Tell them you are looking for an AA meeting. I'm told the police usually know where the meetings are.

2) Look under "alcoholism" in the phone book. Call those places and ask.

Oh - now I remember who this came from. A guy who chairs a meeting I go to used to travel a LOT on business and claims to have been to meetings in all 50 states. He said he has used these two methods to find meetings back when he was often drunk when looking for them, as well as since he has been continuously sober. I hope I never have to travel a lot for work again, but I will remember the tip. (even if I forget where it came from LOL!)

Also Gyco - good for your sister on her reading!

WF, I'm amazed at how much less of a procrastinator I am now compared to when I was drinking every day. I think you will be amazed as well once you "shake it loose." There will be no stopping you!! I think you will like working the steps (even when the going is challenging) once you get started. For me, I started to see the light at the end of the tunnel which keeps me motivated through the harder stuff.

My sponsor is on vacation and in town this week so it's nice to look forward to seeing her at a meeting every day!

DG

[Doggygirl]

Weekly AA Thread - Week of Oct. 12 - 18

On another topic...

A couple people from one of my home groups are planning on going to the big AA Convention in San Antonio next summer. I guess reservations fill up quickly for these things. Everyone says these big events are really something to remember. I haven't been to San Antonio in many years and would love to go back!! So I'm thinking about it. Is anyone here going or considering it? Here is a link to more info Alcoholics Anonymous : 2010 INTERNATIONAL CONVENTION OF ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS

Now THAT would be a GET TOGETHER!!!!

DG

[retteacher]

Weekly AA Thread - Week of Oct. 12 - 18

DG: I was just talking to one of the AAers we had over yesterday for brunch about the convention. I would so love to meet you. Our son, Jimmy, lives in the S.A. area, & we were there last summer w/the rest of the family. It's a great place! Later in the day, I'll go to the link you put in.

I'm doing fine. I went to Alanon last night w/my husb. It's the 12 steps but a completely different ambience. The meeting was on step 10 which I've been trying to do w/consistency. I heard a speaker recently who said that she reads pp. 86 - 88 in the BB daily. I've been trying to do that as well. It contains a lot of great stuff.

Take care one & all.

Mary

[retteacher]

Weekly AA Thread - Week of Oct. 12 - 18

DG: I just looked at the info for the AA convention. I'm going to ask my friend Peggy about it. It'd be great to get a group from up here & go. Last summer we stayed at the Crown Plaza...it was a lovely hotel. We stayed in adjoining rooms w/our daughter, SIL, & the boys. We had Jimmy's kids in w/us...plenty of room. The downtown of S.A. is very walkable, thought I'm sure there will be shuttles. Anyhow, we'll see what happens. Mary

[cpn1004]

Weekly AA Thread - Week of Oct. 12 - 18

Greetings all. Yesterday I got my 30 day chip....finally...Now I am off to Florida for the week. Hope to find some local meetings. So far the internet has been useful for that.

DG, great words about what we have in common. Everyone have a great sober day.
Love and Peace,
Phil

[retteacher]

Weekly AA Thread - Week of Oct. 12 - 18

Phil: I'm so thrilled for you about the 30 day chip. Keep on going! If you have time, please let us know if/how the 30 days of sobriety has changed your life. Has your wife noticed & commented? Anyhow, I couldn't be happier for you. Mary

[Doggygirl]

Weekly AA Thread - Week of Oct. 12 - 18


:yougo:PHIL on 30 DAYS!!!:yougo:


That rocks Phil. I'm so happy for you! I hope you have a chance to enjoy some nice weather in Florida as well as find some meetings. I hope you will share some of your adventures with attending meetings in so many different places.

Mary, I went ahead and made reservations today. The downtown hotels are already full!!!!! I reserved at one of the hotels that is about 9 or 10 miles away - I believe near the airport. I also made a flight reservation. There is a connection and on the "seat selection" option there were hardly any seats "taken" from Chicago to Atlanta, but from Atlanta to San Antonio there were more seats "taken" than not. There is probably still quite a bit of time to book flights (but maybe not???). It seems pretty clear that making travel arrangements will get more and more limited with time, and probably difficult at some point. At least for getting in on Thursday and returning on Monday. I'm pretty excited about this. I've heard these conventions are awesome. I feel very grateful that Mr. Doggy is supportive of me going. He is so good about trusting me to go do the things I enjoy - and of course he does the things he enjoys WITHOUT forcing me to go along if I don't want too. Both of us being sober and sane makes such a huge difference as we work out our life details together!!!! I respect that this type of event would bore him silly and I don't mind that he doesn't want to go with. I'm grateful we can be honest and supportive that way.

Anyway...today's meeting was totally awesome. It was an open topic meeting, and the topic selected was honesty. The chair noted that the word honesty appears 3 times in the very first paragraph of "How It Works." Hmmm....guess honestly is pretty important. Everyone had something to say about how dishonest our lives were as active drunks, and how it's going as we work to change that aspect of life. All good stuff!

Tomorrow is the meeting that I chair out of Daily Reflections. The reading is a good one about this "Program for Living." I love that headline. When drinking, I was on the "Program for Dying" spiritually, mentally and physically. AL choked off all that was good in life for me.

Well, have a nice rest of the day one and all. Strength and hope!

DG

[Winefree]

Weekly AA Thread - Week of Oct. 12 - 18

Tomorrow nights my big start with first meeting with my sponsor. Already have my homework done. Feels good to be doing more than just attending the meetings.
We've talked about the convention next yr as well. I don't think I'm ready for that yet. Would love to hear all about it though.

Winefree