AF Daily - Saturday 4/2

[greeneyes]

Fabbies!

Beautiful sunny breezy day is promised!
Off to yoga in a bit.
Cindi are you on a working weekend? Stick close, OK? As in THIS thread. :l

I got the firepit home yesterday! I plant to give it a go today. (ooommmmmm) When I was picking it up, it took forever as the girl at the register kept stopping in mid sentence and put her hand at the base of her throat and breathe. I just waited, wondering what was happening with her... she finally managed to tell me she's pregnant and when she speaks it makes her nauseous. I thought, wow, it's going to be a loooooong day for her - she was at the returns/info desk. Eeek!

One thing is for sure!!

[universal]

AF Daily - Saturday 4/2

Morning abbers,

My daughter had a sleepover last night and I'm surprised they are up and running but they are! Her friend is a great kid, I love her to death and they had a lot of fun which was nice.

I slept pretty much all day yesterday - my body obviously needed it. I feel better today - it's sunny but cold out! But one thing is for sure.

[Lavande]

AF Daily - Saturday 4/2

Good morning Abbers!

Glad to report its not snowing today :H

I am so ready for Spring!!!!!!

Enjoy that firepit Greenie ~ do you have your marshmallows ready?

Uni, hope your day is a good one

I have to start thinking about some Spring house cleaning in the chicken coop & could use some help - anyone interested?

Wishing everyone a fantastic AF Saturday!
Lav

[papmom3]

AF Daily - Saturday 4/2

Be right over Lav-in about 8 hours :H! Do you want to wait???

Uni-sleep is good!! Hope you feel better today and more hopeful.

Greenie-oh that poor girl!! Enjoy your firepit!!

[Cassia]

AF Daily - Saturday 4/2

Hello everyone,

Defo got a chest infection or something! Feeling pretty crappy but glad it hit me when I left the states and now while I was there. That would have been AWFUL!

So, just to let you know I will most likely be moving to New Jersey..staying in Jersey City for a few months and then either
JC, Weehawken or Hoboken. I love it there and I don't have to pay crazy NYC rents! Win win!
Off to a wedding with my beat friend tonight. I can see it far enough but I promised her I would go so I am goi g to honour that. Otherwise, not much else going on today. Have an awesome af Saturday!

X

[papmom3]

AF Daily - Saturday 4/2

Hey Cassia!! I lived in Hackensack for a year and worked in Teaneck for 2 years (lived in Elizabeth City for 1 year too). I have a pap friend who owns her own dog walking business in JC so if you end up getting a dog and need a great dog walker just let me know and I'll send you her website link.
I sure hope you feel better soon! Those chest infections are nasty and usually put me out of commission for a week or so. Don't stay too long if you're really feeling crappy-it's not worth it! Your friend will understand.
I'm so excited for you!! :goodjob:

[Cassia]

AF Daily - Saturday 4/2

Hey P3,

Thanks - I am pretty excited for me too. My friends are also going to be moving to JC in the next 12 months and they have two dogs and are always looking for trusting dog walkers. They aren't easy to find.

When did you move to New England?

X

[Sarasmiles]

AF Daily - Saturday 4/2

Hey Everyone,
Happy Saturday! Greenie, do enjoy your firepit. Sounds lovely.
Cassia, best of luck with the wedding and feel better soon!
Uni, glad you got some sleep. It's part of healing! Feel good today!
Lav, I'm ready for spring too. We have another 3 inches of snow on the ground and the days of gardening still seem far off. Had a great run in the woods with my dog this morning, though.
Hi to Papmom!

Hello and good wishes to all Abbers to come!

I was bothered by Hubby's drinking last night. He didn't really seem drunk, and He tells me he only had two, but he came to bed smelling a lot like booze. It seemed like it was seeping out of his pores, not just on his breath. I hate that. Makes me sick. Hope it doesn't offend anyone to say that he also wanted "intimacy"...all I could do was try not to breathe in that alcohol smell. It really took the joy out of it for me. If I tell him that, I know he'll be hurt...But it can't be good for me to pretend. Just another challenge of being sober, I guess.

He often brings a drink to bed with him. I've told him it bothers me and he stops for a bit but then picks up the habit again. I am really working on accepting what I cannot change. But I think I also need to work on "the wisdom to know the difference". Can I change his behavior? I know we are told we can't change other people. But does that mean we should bite our tongues and let them do whatever they want, even if it bothers us??? I'm not clear on this. My husband is generally a love. He adores me and the kids and shows it in a lot of ways. I just don't think he gets the drinking thing, and he wants no part in my recovery, it seems. He never really thought I needed to quit, so maybe it doesn't seem necessary to him to change his own behavior to support me. Maybe I need to tell him more about the internal struggle I have had with this addiction. Maybe on the outside I really seemed ok. But I wasn't.

Anyway, I'm at work. Wishing everyone well this weekend! Hubby and I are going out for dinner and a play tonight, and I have no qualms about ordering a nice seltzer or a bottle of Pelligrino if they have it, and enjoying food, conversation and being waited on. All of that is better than drinking!! I'll even allow myself dessert if I feel like it. I get to spoil myself in other ways as needed. How's that for a plan?

Sara

[papmom3]

AF Daily - Saturday 4/2

I've lived practically my whole life in new england Cassia-the new jersey stint was my first full time professional job. I couldn't wait to get home tho!! I'm a new englander at heart! Been back here ever since I left NJ-20+ years now and no desire to move out of state. Out of the city, yes but not out of state.
Hey Sarah-good morning! Sorry you have to work today! Sorry to about your husband. Never having been married I have no words of wisdome for you-just lots of :l.

[momof3]

AF Daily - Saturday 4/2

Good Morning Fabber Abbers,

Happy to have the work week and the 12 hour days over. I am still fighting this cold that keeps hanging on. I don't like to take antiobiotics and can't remember the last time I did, but I may have to bring in the big guns.

Sara, I am sorry to hear this about your husband. It is hard when change is introduced into a familly dynamic; even if it is a positive one. IMHO, it would be good for you to say something because doing what you're doing now could end up in a relapse. My husband rarely drinks, but if he was a frequent drinker, even a casual one, it would have VERY hard for me in the beginning. Perhaps you can lay some groundrules with him and tell him what it is like from your perspective and not in an accusing way, e.g., "I really cannot drink anymore. I understand you don't think I have a drinking problem but I think I do. It is hard for me when you come to bed with a drink or with alcohol on your breath, can we agree that you won't do that? It would really mean alot to me."

Greenie. Enjoy that firepit. It is the next best thing to a campfire.

Cinders, It is good to see you here and YES please stick here with us. I admire your tenaciousness (spelling??). Any short or long-term plans to stop being on the road for work?

Beck!!!!Good to see you hear again. I am very happy to hear that you are still AF. It's been a long time for you now. Congrats.

Hi P3, Lav, Uni, Cass and all to come.

It's been a cold and rainy week. I'm looking forward to some sunshine and warmer weather for sure.

M3

[jennyneric]

AF Daily - Saturday 4/2

Good morning all! Lovely morning isn't it!

[greeneyes]

AF Daily - Saturday 4/2

I have bluebird babies!!! :wd::yay::cheering

[papmom3]

AF Daily - Saturday 4/2

Very cool Greenie!! I hope the bluebirds in my state wait a few more weeks before nesting-it's too cold and snowy!!

Hey Jennie, M3!!

[Sarasmiles]

AF Daily - Saturday 4/2

momof3;1089664 wrote: Perhaps you can lay some groundrules with him and tell him what it is like from your perspective and not in an accusing way, e.g., "I really cannot drink anymore. I understand you don't think I have a drinking problem but I think I do. It is hard for me when you come to bed with a drink or with alcohol on your breath, can we agree that you won't do that? It would really mean alot to me."


M3

Thank you m3. That seems like very good advice. Since we're going out for dinner alone tonight, I'll try to talk with him in just that way. May have to print out your words as a cheat sheet!

[Doggygirl]

AF Daily - Saturday 4/2

Hi fabbies! Back from the Mary Kay event which was motivational as always. There are some incredible women with some incredible stories in that group. And of course an wildly incredible amount of :bling. And countless pink Caddys and "lesser" (:H) MK cars in the parking lot. I wrote a little about the topic of "fear" in the AA thread. Fear is still a strong influence in my life and it was very interesting to reflect that ALL of these super successful and glittering women have it too. They are just braver than I am about stepping out of their comfort zones. Food for thought.

Greenie, thinking of you by your new fire pit makes me smile. Which I could be there with you. Toasting marshmallows. Oh wait. Those have sugar and I have to give that up. AGAIN. (but I digress....) BLUEBIRD BABIES!!! :yougo: Remember Popper and the birdcam? Her nest is still there right over our "formal" front door that we never use. Her or her twin have been coming for a few years now. I was just asking Gary yesterday if he thinks she will be back.

Uni, sounds like a much needed rest day yesterday! I hope you are having a good day. It's sunny but still cooler than average here too. I guess sunny is good if we can't "have it all" right?

Lav I would really love to help you clean the coop. Really I would. I'm not sure exactly when you are doing this, but I am very sorry to report that I already have another committment. Besides. I don't have any chicken boots yet. There. I'm done with my excuses. What is YB doing?

P3, what are you up to this weekend? (sorry if I missed all that yesterday...)

Cassia, sorry to hear you ended up sick when you got home. Hope that passes quickly for you. Sounds like some very exciting things coming up in your life! Sobriety rocks, doesn't it?

((((Sara))))) It's funny about the booze smell. I noticed when I worked the concert last weekend that some people drinking AL really reeked of it and others didn't. I sort of assumed that had to do with quantity consumed, at least in part. (mainly because I was thinking how I must have REEKED given my own level of drinking, when I thought vodka didn't smell :H) Anyway....sorry there is still discord about AL in your household. I love M3's suggested approach. You can't change him, but you CAN talk to him in the most optimal way and maybe one day he will decide to change him. Acceptance does not mean "be a doormat." It is just a realistic way of viewing a situation. I can't change my husband but if handled appropriately, I have a chance at influencing his choice. I can express my opinion / feelings about the matter, and ask for his help or cooperation. One thing is for sure - in my house nagging does NOT work. It also requires a huge effort on my part to not only consider my approach, but also to patiently wait for the right timing. I'm used to behaving like a petulant child so timing is something I've really had to work at since sobering up. When it works though, it's a beautiful thing.

M3, I hope your cold passes soon! I know what you mean about avoiding anti-biotics. Sometimes it can't be helped. Take care of YOU!!

Jenny, indeed it is lovely today. I swear that yesterday the forecast was for rain today. So even though it's chilly and windy, the sun is a pleasant surprise. Hope you are having a good day.

Well, one thing is for sure. Sugar sucks the big one just like AL. So sugar needs to be kicked to the curb (AGAIN!!) too.

DG

PS: "You have included 8 images in your post..." ull