Simply Sober October

[Lavande]

Simply Sober October

Good evening all,

Sitting here watching the presidential debate & not real impressed so far.......

Dill, I'm glad you had the option to reduce your work days! I dropped down to 4 days/week with pro-rated benefits toward the end of my nursing career - the job was killing me. Besides, it's a lot more fun playing with the grandkids anyway. EB will be 4 next month & he still loves coming here to spend the day with me. He told me yesterday "i'm having such a good time with you MiMom'

Chill, like Dill I live in cow country. The nearest town is 8 miles away & there is not much going on there as far as emplyment goes. I hope you can find something to yuor liking

Tip, you were born 2 1/2 month before my 3rd birthday
I'm so sorry to hear about your baby girl, must have been very difficult. Spending time with the grandkids has been such a healing thing for me, hope you enjoy yours too:l

OK, good night all!

PS: where's our girl SD these days??

[sdlovespackers]

Simply Sober October

Hi My Friends!! :l

I've been thinking so much about you all lately and have realized just how long it's been since I've checked in and read....honestly there is no way I could probably catch up on the reading at this point, I apologize...the time has gotten away from me, which I fear it would once school started! I sure hope everyone is doing well...the little bits and pieces I picked up as I was scrolling through...Chill was job searching and dealing with a boy about my son's age...fun times, I'm sure!! LOL!! Dill was possibly going to 4 day school weeks did I read??? LUCKY!!!

Tipp & Nurdl--I don't think we've met!! HOWDY!!

Lav--What the heck kind of nasty creatures were those things??? GROSS!!!! My house has been infested with flies lately...like hundreds....honestly I keep thinking garbage or food left out somewhere (son's room)...or dead body buried in my basement!!! :H

Star--You don't need any certain sign to take a vacation...ANYTIME is a GOOD TIME for a vacation!!

I didn't read back to far...I'm so sorry...how's my football gal pal Rusty doing these days?? How about Pap3? How about LadyB???

Quick update I guess:
Had a couple more "dates" with different people...I guess I'm just enjoying going out and meeting people...not being afraid anymore....I have so much more confidence in myself and know what I want and what I don't.

Work has been CRAZY!!! I feel like I've been busier than I've ever been with seeing kids...somedays I feel so stressed but that's ok...nothing has been too big that I can't handle..lol!!

My son has been having some behavior issues lately...I'm thinking...UGH...we may be entering PRE-TEEN years!!! But for the most part he's been pretty good too!!

I will do better about keeping in touch...I hate not knowing whats going on with you all!! I miss you all so much!!!:l
SD

[dill]

Simply Sober October

Lav, I watched the debate last night and found it to be very interesting. I think it's the first time I can remember that a debate felt like an real debate where the two actually engaged in direct back and forth. I had to go to bed before it ended because of Granny Exhaustion Syndrome. I recorded it though and hope to watch the rest on the weekend.

Tipp, I too am sorry to hear about your loss. I can't imagine anything more painful. Your decision to use your daughter's birthday as your wedding date made good sense to me.

SD, I'm SO GLAD you popped in. You know we've been missing you! I'm glad you are doing so well. Remind me how old your son is. I have a girlfriend at work whose son is in trouble more often than not. He's 13. He's basically a good kid, just needs a little more impulse control!

Off I go to have an AF Thursday. I wish you all the same.

[Lavande]

Simply Sober October

IMPULSE CONTROL for kids.......
I remember those issues, I wish you well SD

Off to get my teeth cleaned, oh joy!

[Chillgirl]

Simply Sober October

Happy Thursday Guys

SD - Lovely to see you! Please check in more often, I reckon I could use your advise on 12 year old boys!

Lav - I love the feeling of having clean teeth just wish it lasted longer. I couldnt agree with you more re scouts etc. My Sister enlisted her kids in every activity going when they were young and she now has 3 very active fit 20 plus year old boys. My other sister didnt put her kids into anything and now in their 20's they are unfit, sedentary and one smokes and they have nothing like the zest for life or drive my other nephews have, its interesting to observe.

Tip - How brave of you to make that date your wedding anniversary. I wish you with all my heart that it did make happy memories and eased the painful ones.

Dill - GES :H I love it! I dont even have grandkids but will be borrowing that one. You asked about my location for work. I live 6 miles from Bury St Edmunds which is a market town with a population of 35,000 so I feel confident I could find work there. From a lifestyle point of view I dont want a long commute and the drive is a leisurely 15 minutes along country roads. My gym is in town and I would want to fit that into my schedule as well as doggy care for Elle. Its all do-able and Im feeling pretty optimistic about finding work.

[Tipplerette]

Simply Sober October

Interesting point, Lav. Kids have to have an activity to get them off the street corners. Mine had competitive hockey and soccer. If it weren't for these sports, at least two of the three would have gotten themselves into deep trouble. To stand with the gang on the corner, look at your watch and say, "I've got to go." give a kids a feeling of importance and worth. It's like being the only kid playing hide and go seek at night who is NOT called in by Mom or Dad.. just left standing there... that is what causes attention getting behaviour. I am no expert but that's just my opinion.

Lately the devlish voice in my sober head has been reminding me of the mistakes I made when my kids were young... trying to entice me to drink to forget the memories of me causing them dissapointment which of course, breaks my heart. Rather than drinking, I repeated over and over again that I forgive myself and can't change the past. I don't know if I convinced myself totally but I did not feel too tempted to drink. By not drinking, the real reasons for drinking seem to be appearing. I guess this is normal.

Have a great weekend all.

[Lavande]

Simply Sober October

Tip, our good friend Dill recommended a great book to help with all that. 'The Power of Now' by Eckhart Tolle. I read it & reread it ~ always helps

As far as guiding young boys goes -
My son with his ADHD (which I refused to medicate) was pretty much a disaster in the sports department. He did much better with activities he could do on his own, trumpet & guitar lessons for a long time. But he really did respond well to the whole scouting thing I think because he had good scoutmasters & it was all very organized for him. The kid eneded up earning his Eagle award, college scholarships, etc. But by the time he turned 17 his attention was in the fire dept. But that was OK too because once again he had good instructors, had to attend all the fire schools, etc. Now here he is making a career out of all that.
Boys are a lot of work :H :H

Well, today is YB's 60th birthday & I did go as far as inviting him for dinner. But he doesn't get a gift :H

Have a great AF day one & all!
Lav

[Rusty]

Simply Sober October

Good Evening Sober Ones,

SD!...I was just going to PM you and say, "Where the hell are you, woman? I miss you!!" And here you are.:yay: So you've been out on a few dates, huh? Well, don't worry my friend, I'll still keep our date open for the visit to the sperm bank Speaking of football, yeah, did you see the Packer game last week? Oh, that's right....you're a v-v-v-v-Vikings fan. hahahah! Sorry to see your son is having issues. I have total faith in you....you'll handle it in the best way.

I am in Pittsburgh with a new client. Nice people, but I have a bad cold and I'm exhausted. I am also a bit down and must snap out of this mood. Yesterday, one of my co-workers who passed the automotive exam told me quite excitedly in an e-mail that she's going to Ireland for work, using that old, overused and ready-to-be retired saying, "it's a tough job but somebody's got to do it," then goes on to say that she can't wait to see me at our annual conference next June. She tutored me (I paid her VERY well) for the exam and she knew how hurt I was that I didn't pass that exam, and I felt like she rubbed it in my face. I had an opportunity to go to Ireland before I flunked my exam but I couldn't make time for it in my schedule. I've wanted to go to Ireland for years, and she knew that. I haven't responded to her e-mail.....I want her to know that I am not going to rush to respond. Ok, I'm done with my rant. Thanks for listening.

Tip-I was both touched and saddened by both of your significant dates. You are incredibly brave and I cannot imagine the pain you felt when you lost your baby. So you're Canadian, me, too....I'm half Canadian French.

Chill-you live in Bury St. Edmunds....ohhh....I'm jealous...what a cool place to live, and good luck with the job hunt.

Dill-That is so great that you reduced your days at work. I am doing the same. I think it will prevent me from getting burned out, overwhelmed and hence, turning to AL for escape. Not going down that road again....no way.:no!:

Lav, what did you make YB for his birthday? A Slap Sandwich?:H

Star-When to go on vacation? When your body and your mind say, "ENOUGH!" Also, I think it's important if you have the flexibility, to take a day off every few weeks just to recharge your batteries.

Big hellos to everyone else.....I'm barely staying awake here. Have a simply sober Thursday night.

[rustop59]

Simply Sober October

Hi everyone

Have been having problems with our broadband so have not been able to get online much. Reading when I get a chance and am thinking of you all.

Rustop

[Lavande]

Simply Sober October

Good morning everyone!

Rustop, I was wondering about you
I just can not function without my internet connection....business & personally speaking :H

My brain has been functioning a day ahead all week long so today is Friday #2 in my head. Why does that happen??

OK, off to Curves then back here to get some work done. Wishing everyone a great AF Friday!
Lav

[Stargazerlily]

Simply Sober October

Good morning all...

I had a busy week, thinking I had posted, but apparently not in the last few days.

I did plan our trip, Arizona, and a ranch for a few days, with horseback riding, biking, swimming, and alot of outdoors time, a totally different environment and experience. I am so excited. AZ Family Vacations – Horseback Riding Ranches – Ranch Vacations - Tucson Hotels Check it out.

Tip, we all made mistakes as mothers, I know I did. I was a yeller for a time, young and overwhelmed. However, give yourself a break and think about the fact that you did the best you could at the time, with what you knew. Dill, Lav, do you have any regrets? Sometimes I think the hardest thing is to forgive ourselves for our mistakes.

Chill, love to hear your positive attitude about work, I am sure you will find something soon.

SD, good to hear from you. Kids always have challenges, you are in a good place to handle them, with your knowledge and experience. Dating, how fun, good to hear from you.

Rusty, don't you hate when someone is needlessly cruel? It is so annoying, and even more. I really think you are in a better place with you new position, it seems that you have had more time off, more home time, etc. Hope it's true.

Lav, you are so kind to have YB over for dinner. By the way, that IS a gift.

Dill, it is great to work 4 days. I am doing it and even with less money, no benefits, find it a good fit for me.

Lots to do today, and it is getting colder, high 52 degrees. Brrrrrr

To all, have a good day.

[Chillgirl]

Simply Sober October

Lav - if you are going to have a day twice then Friday is the one to have
I also struggle not to be connected to the internet and was just marvelling yesterday at the ingenius invention of wi-fi, it wasnt so long ago you had to be plugged in to one point in the house. Now my ipad comes with me to every room and I even have it set to wake me with my fav internet radio.

Rustop - Hope you get connected properly again soon. Have you settled into a quieter routine with your girls back at Uni?

Rusty - Just remember that traveling isnt as glamorous as it sounds. How many times did you fly all over the place and only see the inside of a hotel room and your Clients office. Instead you now get to spend more time with the family you adore and on "Rusty" time. :l

I was at the hospital again today for more gyny investigations, i have a possible polyp on my uterus and now have to see another Dr next week to decide whats next. Im sure they will just remove it but you have to go through this back and forth from hospital to GP before anything gets done which is frustrating.

Wishing you all a wonderful AF Friday.

[Chillgirl]

Simply Sober October

OMG Star! Just checked out your trip, looks amazing when do you leave?

[papmom3]

Simply Sober October

hey hey everyone!!! Happy October!!

Welcome Tip and Nurl. you will like it here very much. Sort of like landing on a very soft feathery pillow or mattress.

Chill-good luck with the job hunt and the child. You have more kahuna's than I do that's for sure. If I ever do take up dating again, kids under 20 will NOT be tolerated!

Star-what a great vaca you have planned!! I hope you plan to take lots of pics and post them!!

Dill-I missed where you said you're going to a 4 day work week. I thought that was Lav who said she did that at the end of her career. If you can pull that off working in a school, more power to you!! I would kill for a 4 day work week!!

Rustop-glad you could stop in for a sec. Hope the broadband woes work themselves out.

Rusty-I'm so sorry your friend is being so mean. Any chance at all she totally forgot you didn't pass the exam??? I sure hope your cold gets better real soon.

SD-so glad to have you back. Did you get a new job this school year? I seem to remember something about that but maybe I was dreaming. Have fun with the dating thing. He's out there for you!!

So it's been a bear of a week. It's never fun to return after a nice vacation but to come down with a raging UTI and possible kidney stone was just plain mean. I have never felt such pain in my life!! I'm on Cipro and that was no picnic for the first 2 days either. Lots of nasty side effects. But I got through it all and survived. 4 more days on Cipro and I should be good to go. I'm drinking tons of water too. Now I have a 3 day weekend with no commitments other than my neph's B-day party. He will get his quilt then too.

I am still job hunting. There are a couple of IT jobs I will apply for. One in Western Ma and one down the Cape.

I am also exploring once again trading in my car for something more effiecient. The fact that I have such a huge loan on it is not in my favor, especially since only 6 months after I bought it it has depreciated 4K. But I need to set aside time to speak with the bank the loan is with and see if I can turn some of it into a personal loan to get it off the car. Then I might have a better chance of trading it in.

I am also looking into different car insurance quotes and need to have a talk with my agent.

It just doesn't seem right that I have to work two jobs, spend all this time trying to cut expenses and still be in the red every month. The second job was supposed to take care of all the extras. Sigh. It's very tiring and overwhelming. I just want to wake up and have one day when I'm not constantly checking my bank balance to make sure no surprises have happened. Just one day to say, yes I can buy that extra can of cat/dog food or that pound of chicken and not worry I'll overdraw my account.

People suggest couponing but you still have to have money to buy the stuff before you can apply the coupon. I can't even walk into a grocery store until next Friday. The big question will be if I will have enough gas from my fill up last nite to make it home next Thursday.

I am also very sad tonite because this was supposed to be my big agility weekend up in Maine. I had to forfeit my $50 campsite deposit as well. it is supposed to be a gorgeous weekend up there and it would have been so much fun to run DD again.

So bear with me please while I work through all of this. I know it's becoming a repeating record but I really have no one else to talk to about all this.

[Lavande]

Simply Sober October

Papmom, please feel free to moan away ~ we are listening!
I don't know but I still think a bunch of us should look into communal living. If you combine all of our various skills & life experiences, we could possibly put together an effective & efficient commune ~ just sayin :H
Life & living is just damn expensive, no two ways about it!!! I hope you can get your expenses under control papmom so you don't have to continue working your butt off....
Good thing hanging around here is free.

star, I have been jealous of everyone getting away for a few days, what can I say> Your trip looks deilightful, hope you have a great time!

chill, the Joys of Peri Menopause......
I was found to have two uterine fibroids which caused very heavy & very long periods (something else to make you feel like crap). I was offered treatment options but decided to put off anything surgical hoping that menopause would just resolve the problem itself & it did. No fun bleeding for 21+ days in a row :confuseed: I hope you are not dealing with that, ugh.

I was supposed to be kid free today but ended up with the boys here for a few hours anyway. Once again this is because of my son's erratic & ever changing work schedule & my DIL needing time to get her school assignments completed.

star, I doubt that anyone can truly say they have no regrets. I have a few but not where my kids are concerned. I regret stuff like not having the courage to stand up to an abusive parent & not walking away from YB before our 1st wedding anniversary. I almost did......

Oh well, day is done. Wishing everyone a cozy night, I just turned the AC off & hope I can keep it off!!