AF Daily - Thursday 18 October

[LillyE]

AF Daily - Thursday 18 October

But here's another reminder of why this shit is hard. A friend just texted me saying 'Hey let's go get a drink tonight. I'm in your neighbourhood' - this friend has no idea I've quit drinking.

It's bloody relentless and I'd be lying if I said I wasn't dreading the festive (read: drunken) season. This is something it'd be great to discuss in coming weeks - strategies for dealing with all the holiday parties Al free. I have made plans to go away for Chrissy with a friend who does drink but who is very supportive when I'm not drinking and that was part of the reason I made the plan to begin with. I'd love to hide out and avoid NYE altogether (which I hate anyway) but I can't as I have a cousin visiting from overseas. I haven't told him about the drinking thing yet but I anticipate him being supportive even though he also drinks - so shouldn't be too bad. He wants to see the fireworks. Other friends asked already about a whole lot of us going out and I was just like "no - can't do it". New Year's is my least favourite holiday of the entire year - I just think the whole thing is a bit stupid and stressful and it's the worst night to be out with all the drunken fuckwits - so out in bars sober on NYE? Hell no.

What are other people's plans/strategies for the hols?

[CanToo]

AF Daily - Thursday 18 October

Hmm, although I haven't really talked about it much but I'll be alone during the holidays... As I have been for years. Winter with it's lack of sunlight is a very hard season for me. I've made sure the boys go to the ex's because he has family here. I do not.

I am also skipping the work X-mas party this year as I don't really feel like saying "No thanks I'm not drinking right now" when I should say I don't drink anymore.

Ugh....

But that's ok. I'm in the gym, on spin bikes and already have two snowshoe hikes scheduled for boxing day (Dec 26th for those in the U.S.) and the 29th. No room for drinking as it could very well be -20 those days.

Staying busy so there's no time to think about it.

Still not ready to think about it...... But I am determined not to waste anymore of my money and time on beer.

Day 84 today On day 91 I will stop counting.

Sigh,

CT

Welcome home Lilly
You sound happy Sun
BAFA, I imagine the autumns are beautiful in Maine. I too am envious of your chance to move and your fresh start
PPPPQ thank you for your 4:30 AM start!
KY, you're really rockin the newbies thread. Nice!
Sausage - hi. When I first came onto this site you scared me. But I think it's time I find this thread of yours. 8 months? Well done
Lav - you always amaze me. You are such a strong part of MWO. Thank Ypu for finding your way here everyday. You show us such grace and strength.
Mick when I think of you I think of my English Uncle who lived in Scotland. . And then I think about my trip to Aberdeen when I was 13 and how EVERY night we went to the pub. And how my Uncle would hand me straight shots of some hard liquor. He never did quit drinking like you. I'm glad you did...

[lifechange]

AF Daily - Thursday 18 October

hello all you wonderful abbers.
i've had one of the busiest weeks ever and for that reason haven't said boo.
i haven't had time to read back much either, but you are all in my thoughts.

Lilly, i am so happy to see you back and feeling strong. on sunday i will have some time so i will write in more detail. i'm also having some concerns about the holiday season (mostly the stress of patchwork family planning. ughh,) so i would love to exchange strategies.

Sausage, you hang tight there. i think it's great that you're working so hard, posting and sharing your story and thoughts. that helps all of us--

big hugs to Mick, PPQ, Sun, Cantoo, Lav, Yah, KY, Blondie--i'm glad to see you back and sounding so strong!! see you all soon, Life

[LillyE]

AF Daily - Thursday 18 October

Oh CanToo here's a hug for you in advance of the holidays. I can relate. I am always an orphan at other people's family hols and sometimes it really gets me down. This year I was so happy when a girlfriend suggested escaping the city altogether for the hols. We will be renting a place by the beach for a week. I don't know if I'll have access there but I'm sure you will find support here if you need it. It's a tough time or year to be estranged from one's family or alone that's for sure.

But GOOD FOR YOU for making active plans and well done on 84. WOWSERS. That is incredible!

[LillyE]

AF Daily - Thursday 18 October

*waves hi to Life* HI LIFE - look forward to catching up whenever you've time. Hope you've been doing ok my friend.

[kuya]

AF Daily - Thursday 18 October

Dreading Xmas cos that's when I slipped last year. Only had nine weeks sober so this year will have a little longer under my belt........ But.

Very aware of why I slipped last time but will be glad to get the other side. Never liked the season, always try to for the kids but it is such hard work. Working full time and then being mum shopping and cooking. Really hoping future DIL will be helping, as I am sure she will. My oldest son will help but can't cook, my younger son can cook but is sooooo lazy. My daughter now helps a lot with chores so I am going to TRY and not pretend to be superwoman. This is why I drank..... Wanting to be perfect, but then wanting to escape.

Sausage .... You feeling any stronger? Wanted to ask you something re your wavering at the moment but don't know you well enough and no longer trust PMs.

CANTOO ---apart from short periods over the Xmas I will probably be bored as, so seek me out for a chat! My favorite day of the year is Jan 2 ---- when all the hype is over (grinch, bah humbug ! :H:H)

[LillyE]

AF Daily - Thursday 18 October

It does just feel like a lot of hype sometimes doesn't it KY. Bah humbug. ;0

Well, I guess we will all need to remind ourselves and each other of the good bits of enjoying the season AF, such as feeling healthier - and therefore more able to deal with stress - being present, really enjoying the food, saving all that $ at a costly time of year and so forth.

KY [HI btw] why do you no longer trust PMs?

[kuya]

AF Daily - Thursday 18 October

LillyE;1395232 wrote: It does just feel like a lot of hype sometimes doesn't it KY. Bah humbug. ;0

Well, I guess we will all need to remind ourselves and each other of the good bits of enjoying the season AF, such as feeling healthier - and therefore more able to deal with stress - being present, really enjoying the food, saving all that $ at a costly time of year and so forth.

KY [HI btw] why do you no longer trust PMs?

Firstly Mick is OK. As usual my impatience got the better of me and I PMed him.

Which brings me nicely to your question...... Right at the end of the atheist thread Wildflower accused me of sending a nasty PM to a friend of hers. I would NEVER send a nasty PM to anyone, as you can tell I am an upfront kinda person. At the time I just thought she was being childish and nasty. Later Mamabear told us to take our fight to PM and she said NO. It got me thinking and when you look at the way PMs are set up anything you send me I can alter to say anything I like. I can then forward this to another member claiming it was your words.
Funny thing is I believe WILDFLOWERS. On religious stuff she and I would put up a Berlin wall if we were the only two on a desert island, BUT I kinda like her balls and I think she is telling the truth.
Which means that one of two people I have PMed regarding that matter has altered what I sent. I am unable and unwilling to clarify this with WILDFLOWERS as it reopens a can of worms but, suffice it to say I will NEVER PM anybody I do not know fairly well or trust.

It is something to be aware of, sadly. Obviously MICk falls well into the trust category.