Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

[Lost Soul]

Re: Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

Hi NS,
Really heartening post :happy2: so pleased you are enjoying your sobriety & drawing comparisons to the memory of addiction & how much your life has changed for the better, with your new found freedom.
Take care
LS

[available]

Re: Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

NS a great post, i missed this somehow. Its sad the loamers are off a wandering, we had some great results on here.

I am just shy of 3 years and 3 months and like you my drunk days are a fading memory but when i looked at a photo the other day the memories came flooding back and i know that i never ever want to be that lost, sad, lonely, ashamed, guilt ridden person again. I cant do it to myself or my children. My life now feels like it is someone elses. To others it might seem boring and mundane but to me it is the best. I can achieve something from the time i wake up until the time i go to sleep. I can sleep 8 hours now and wake up sober, i can look in the mirror and see those wrinkles but know they are not due to al and what it did to me. I can be happy, angry or sad and its me, its not influenced by al.

I certainly dont miss the getting home from work, hoping i had money to get al, well i always did. Took from Peter to pay Paul as the saying goes. I dont miss the calls from the utility companies wanting payment and wondering how i could pay it. I dont miss the blackouts which occured at the end every night and wondering what i did and said the night before. I dont miss the isolation that al gave me or the anxiety and depression. I dont take ad's now and very rarely need anything for my anxiety. I am honest with people about who i used to be and to my doctor. God that is so good not to walk in hoping they did not see the other person that i had hidden, to appear normal was hard at the end.

Today i enjoy life and who i am. I bought a new bin the other day, not exciting to many but it was to me. I told my work colleague how i want to stand on both push buttons to see if i can do it. She replied with "little things excite you dont they". Yes little things excite me now, things i never paid attention to before make me smile, showing empathy when i had none, knowing what i want when i had no idea, not giving in when i used to and being honest.

Yes, like you, i sometimes would like to be sociable in situations and have a glass but i know that glass will take me back to that horrible photo eventually and i will lose all that i have worked so hard to achieve.

I have endured death, sickness, work issues, family issues, sick animals, money problems all sober. Oh god for some of them i wanted to drink, i wanted to forget but that drink would only make me forget for a day. Nothing would have been better the next day, everything would have been 1000 times worse. I can never change what happens in life, i can only be here for it as i am now.

I believe in myself now, i know that i can achieve whatever i set out to do, yes it might be hard and i might be anxious but al does not have a hold on me anymore, al has no power over me and 3+years ago i was petrified to give up my best friend, i wondered what i would do in my life if i stopped drinking, i was scared of finding me. Now i love me, i found that Ava is a good egg, a bitch but a good egg.

All of the above that i have written NS is due to you and me. You helped me start, you never gave up and you believed in me when i didnt. You started me along so i can now be who i am today. No amount of thanks will be enough but a long long post surely must suffice.

take care xx

[NoSugar]

Re: Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

Nothing better than a waffle from Ava :smile: :hug:.

[Snoopy56]

Re: Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

Good morning Available, great post, I get it, to drink makes your life and mine HELL, and to be AF is a gift we give ourselves, despite the challenges we are sent. Now, drinking is not normal, it is avoided at all costs.

[Snoopy56]

Re: Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

NS, just read your lovely post too! Thanks, so much, your wisdom, determination and calm has gone a long way for me, wanting to have what you have. The reality of the escape being so brief, knowing how sick alcohol makes me, it is just not worth it on any level. 49 months is amazing. Have a good one.

[Pavati]

Re: Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

Loamers!

I was so happy to see this thread active, and what better way to resurrect it than with waffles from NS and Ava. I will compose my waffle and post it soon when I have the time, but the summary is the same. Thank goodness I am not drinking.

Wondering about everyone on your list and then some.

Pav

[available]

Re: Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

Snoopy, god i cant imagine my life today if i was still drinking and relapse scares the hell out of me but as long as i am around like minded people i will be ok and this is why i am here. It surely is a gift sobriety and i keep unwrapping it each and every day.

I hope you waffle away Pav, we both came on here with a mission and look at us now.

As we know i am always quite happy to talk to myself!

[NoSugar]

Re: Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

Wow, I came across this tread today -- what a lot of good friendships and memories.
I hope all who posted here are living contented, peaceful lives without the burden of addiction.
I miss you and what we had going in this thread. Love, NS

[narilly]

Re: Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

I found this thread today and am happy to report that I am over 5 years sober! It works to have a community I can attest to that.

This thread literally saved my life and was really enjoyable.

[NoSugar]

Re: Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

I LOVED this thread, [MENTION=1354]narilly[/MENTION], and often wonder how many of the people who posted here are doing now. I'm glad a few of us remain on MWO, reminding each other that it can be done and that we never need to go back to those dark old days.

It's kind of amazing that we filled 1147 MWO pages!!!