Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

[acadiaofmaine]

Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

Good freezing morning, Loamers! I'm sorry to be out of the loop, life has been hectic and I find it hard to follow all of the amazing posts! Everyone I read makes me want to respond, and then there's 12 more! All awesome. I have to find a better way to keep up.

Miley, I have been going to AA for a few weeks. I didn't want to go, it was horrifying to me, I had all of the standard ideas about it being only for skid row, living under the bridge folks. But since I had no other plan, and was only getting a couple of AF weeks at a time with very binge-y behavior in between, I decided to go.

[acadiaofmaine]

Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

Good freezing morning, Loamers! I'm sorry to be out of the loop, life has been hectic and I find it hard to follow all of the amazing posts! Everyone I read makes me want to respond, and then there's 12 more! All awesome. I have to find a better way to keep up.

Miley, I have been going to AA for a few weeks. I didn't want to go, it was horrifying to me, I had all of the standard ideas about it being only for skid row, living under the bridge folks. But since I had no other plan, and was only getting a couple of AF weeks at a time with very binge-y behavior in between, I decided to go.

It was a very good decision for me. The program seems to run along two, parallel tracks. You have the steps and readings and some very specific things to do if you want to do them (meditate, pray, etc). And then the other part, which is what I love, is listening to and sharing with a roomful of people just like us. It's true that you get all kinds in AA, but everyone has almost exactly the same experience. Alcoholism seems to be the great leveler and puts us all at basically the same place. I find it inspiring and very moving to listen to others as they describe what they have gone through, how they are getting better, etc. About half of the folks in my meetings are people I could truly be friends with, and the other half I don't know yet!

I think your daughter is incredibly brave to talk to you as she did, and I think going with her, or a friend, is a wonderful idea. It might give you a sense of security and comfort. When I first went, I ran into an old friend who volunteered to be my sponsor. I always sit with her, and she has introduced me to many people. And I also meet folks on my own. It's like a big warm room full of nice people. Kind of like MWO, but a little different in that everyone is sitting in the same place.

Anyway, you have nothing to lose by trying it, Miley. If you decide to go, go to a handful of meetings and see what you think. You can always stop and try something else! It's not like a cult you can't get out of.

Please feel free to PM me if you'd like, or I can continue yammering away about this on the LOAM thread. For me, it seems to me the only thing that is keeping me out of the bottle!

[j-vo]

Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

MAE Ladies,
No school today. The gas in the busses apparently turn into a gel in these temps so they don't start.

Pav, I'm going to look into that "Calm." 10 bucs a year is cheap price to pay for something that will help. Thanks! And how great to know the quality time with the kids is just that, quality.

Hi Daisy! Do you have a plan for yourself? My plan has changed over the months/years. What works for me is reading lots on MWO, reading the toolbox, journaling, and being honest here in the Loamers thread about life and myself. I also check in daily with a few people to tell them how I'm doing. We're here for you, and if you ever need to pm, please do. Drink lots of water these first days.

Ava, are you feeling better ma dear? Did you take another well-deserved day off?

Hi Acadia!

Have a great day ladies. Will check in later.

[narilly]

Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

Miley, I agree with the other ladies here in that there are some good things happening in some AA meetings. I tried it a couple of times but could never keep from drinking. The people I met there were very nice, though, for the most part, and you and your daughter might find it a great local connection to keep you sober.

Humble, I totally agree with your statement. Just try it Miley!

Ava, that heat would kill me. I actually love the cold weather except when it gets to -30, then its a little nuts. I hope you start feeling better. Glad smokes are so expensive and it keeps you from smoking more. Hopefully it will be the next thing you quit, right? I quit when I was 25. Unfortunately it took 25 more years for me to quit drinking!
Pat, unbelievable how inexpensive it is to live where you are. The inexpensive massages sound great!

J-Vo, we use gas line antifreeze to deal with the gas turning to gel. I could send some down to you so you could go to work today...haha, nothing better than a day off. Yes, I can't wait to feel the warmth of Florida and sun on my face. It is actually really sunny in Calgary. We get the most sunny days in Canada! Sunny Calgary
It's going to be cold all week here, in the -teens. But it's not a biggie. It is January after all. AND I'm going to Florida next week FFS!

Pav, yes, enjoy your kids. I totally enjoy mine and treasure the moments with them. This trip to Florida will be awesome because we will be with them the whole time. They are 19 and 17 so we don't see them too much.
Ann, you sound great. Thanks for posting.

Thank you ladies for helping me to stay sober. I love you!

[Starfish1]

Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

Weee!!! What a day!!!!

Did you ever hear that saying "She got up on the wrong side of the bed?" Well, in my case, there must be some truth behind it!
Actually, my husband was out of town last night and one of my cats took my "spot" so I slept in the hubs spot and I guess I actually did get out on the wrong side.
Challenge #1: Winter storm in our area (rare for deep southern U.S.) and I get out of bed and realize our central heating system is out of order. Did I mention that hubs is out of town? He is the one that would normally take charge here, but not today.
Challenge #2: Shouting match with "Bridezilla" because I suggested she may want to drive the all wheel drive vehicle to work today (just thinking of her safety)...she didn't like the idea
Challenge #3: Driving to work, I called hubs to let him know about the heater malfunction and he actually wanted me to go back home...crawl under the house (in the ice and snow) and check to see if the pilot was lit so he wouldn't have to pay 65 bucks for the heater guy to do it!
Challenge #4: Lost control of the (all wheel drive vehicle) and spun out of control on the way to work...luckily no one around for me to hit...and I was sober!
Challenge #5: Got to work and was told they were sending us home due to the weather. Now, I don't get paid if I don't work, so that's bad news for me. On top of that, now I must drive the 12 miles back home, in the snow and ice and I hadn't done so well on the way TO work. Ahhh...the day gets better and better.
Challenge #6: Got home (without incident) to find that we need a "part" for the heater and the heater guy will go "look for one" (don't know if we will get heat later or not)
Challenge #7: Dear DEAR hubs calls and announces that he has invited a young (male) co worker to spend the night in our home tonight so he won't have to travel back to his hometown (which got more snow than we did) WTH???? Where does he think this young man will sleep? Does the young man even know we may not have any feckin heat? I have 2 young dtrs still living at home and three of us compete for one bathroom before work/school each morning (another story)....just what we need...a young male stranger to share the loo with...for Christ's sake...so I am pretty much yelling all this at the husband over the phone and apparently, the young man can hear what I am saying and decides he really doesn't want to stay with us after all. Okey dokey....
Sorry for the rant, but I just had to say: This is day 13 for me....Byrdlady's Lucky 13....So, you know what? I had to decide all of this was not worth drinking over. I developed a little lavattitude...took my beautiful youngest dtr to lunch, ate a nice big salad and arrived home just in time to see the heater guy drive up with the "part"....so hopefully we will have heat, a nice pretty snow scene, some hot chocolate (sugar free, of course) and a little surfing on MWO...what a great day!

:h Star

[NoSugar]

Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

Starfish1;1619677 wrote: Weee!!! What a day!!!!Star, I just responded to your post in the nest - you had a day that could drive a person to drink -- BUT NOT YOU!!! :goodjob:

narilly;1619418 wrote: Hey, I was thinking. I KNOW what will help me stay AF when I go to Florida. It's posting here everyday! I am going to take the time to do that, it will be time well invested.
Good plan, Nar. I travel quite a bit and have been so grateful to have my iPad traveling companion. I bought it at the beginning 2013 and now I'm quite sentimentally attached to it! It has been my lifeline to all of you this year, no matter where I've been. I don't have the fanciest or newest one but I think it will be a long time before I'll be ready to let it go. Being able to stay connected to MWO each and every day has made a huge difference to me. (I know, I know, sounds like another addiction but... so be it ). We'll be eager to hear your reports from what hopefully will be sunny and warm Florida! Are you going to be on a beach or with Mickey Mouse??

j-vo;1619403 wrote: This journey is not just about not drinking, it's about all of the growth that comes from not drinking. Wow.

Pavati;1619428 wrote:
And it is not discouraging to hear that giving up the booze is the easy part ? I have found that not too painfully difficult (at least a lot less difficult than I thought it would be). It is encouraging to hear long timers continue to face their lives, warts and all.

I'm glad my cautionary post didn't freak you guys out :H. In a way, it is enjoyable and interesting to figure out a new way to live. I still sort of enjoy the challenge of doing something for the first time without drinking. I'm not sure if I have too many "firsts" left other than some big ones that I'm not eager for but that are inevitable in life: deaths, separations, ill health, difficult relationships...
I want to develop the skills now to be ready for those types of events so that my first response isn't to get away from the pain in the only way I used to know how. I saw a post by TreeTops yesterday in which she said she doesn't judge people who relapse in response to a life-changing event because she hasn't been tested in that way. I feel that way, too, and just want to be prepared.

available;1619509 wrote: NS feeling ok now lovely? Made it through the day? It makes me realise that even though i am proud of these 60 days tomorrow that i will have times of al trying to get in to my life.

I did make it through the day yesterday and now I'm eating my way through today, too :H. It is ridiculous what happens -- eating "treats" seems to open up this hole in me that no amount of food can fill! Wine did the trick but that's not an option. So, I'm just eating as many nuts and eggs and shrimp and meat and cheese and vegetables and salad as I want and I will tell you, it is a lot!

I just checked my world clock and see that it is 8:30 AM (tomorrow :H) in Melbourne so:


CONGRATULATIONS ON 60 DAYS OF LIVING AN AF LIFE IN AVA-STYLE!!!

My :goodjob: gift for you is an unusually long post to read with your coffee. xx - NS

[available]

Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

Hello loamers, damn i hate it when work interferes with postings from everyone but it does make my posts shorter.

Aca good to have you checking in and i am of the opinion whatever stops us from drinking is a good thing. I think like you about AA meetins or what you did in the beginning. I have googled meetings and know where they are so if i feel i need to go i definitely will as nothing will interfere with me being sober but i find the support on here enough although i wish we could sit in a big room and chat though our meetings would go for 5 hours or more i am thinking.

Jvo wow it must be cold to freeze the gas in the buses, we dont get that sort of cold but i do prefer it to this damn heat. Yes i am at home in bed, head feels like crap but this low blood pressure is nutty, when i stand i get dizzy so i am not enjoying that as i so dont want to pass out and now my anxiety is starting as i have a thing about tumours, so probably a brain tumour for me today, sigh!

Nar give me central heating and i am cosy as, we cant get cooler in the heat, even going naked does not do it! its crazy atm as today is 25 which is lovely but tomorrow is 35. I have been smoking since 13 and i gave up last year for 5 weeks but my son came home with a crack addiction so that gave me a real excuse to start again even though i had al to support me. He gave up crack and i still poured al down my throat but he is one proud boy now i am not drinking. I felt such a hypocrite taking him to a drug and al counsellor and here i was needing help also. i was always scared he would say something about my drinking but he never did, i suppose he knew it was ultimately up to me. Wow that went off the track didnt it? Yes i am giving up fingers crossed this year. You are sounding pretty excited about your holiday, lucky you and to see your kids. I dont think i could function if my kids did not live near me, we all say if anyone wants to move we all have to move together.

Gees star i would not want to stay either lol. That story was so funny and i so love my first chuckle of the day from you guys. Please do not sleep on hubs side of the bed tonight, move that animal. I am so glad you are safe after your car going out of control though. would one not think work would have rang you beforehand and told you not to come to work, some people dont have a brain really. We had 50 heat a few years back and bad bushfires and my boss would not let us go home so i left early and took time off and got the last train out of melbourne before the whole city collapsed. No power, no trains, nothing and thousands stranded. No wonder i cant stand the a*hole. I would have been so iffy about having a strange man in the house if i did not know him. Do you think DH got the hint lol. Glad your day ended up ok though. Bridezilla, mmm been there done that and have the medal. Deep breathes love.

Well i did not go to work, there is no way i could drive for an hour to work so an easy day for me. Going to watch some Doc Martin and enjoy the cool. Day 60 for me today and whodda thought little ole me could get to day 60. I feel like i have not drank for 1000 days somedays and somedays i feel like it is only the really early days but i do know everyday is a good day and now 99% of the time i do not think of al, although yesterday i could have totally enjoyed sitting with an ice cold glass of wine or 100 to dull the draining heat but i had lots of icy cold water and woke up feeling okay. Everyday now is okay and i like okay, its so much better than the internal war that i woke up to every morning and fought every hour to try and not drink and always failing by 5.15pm. Now i dont fail in anything and if i feel i do then thats ok. I am normal or as close to as i will ever be!.

Love you guys and hello to all the loamers who are being quiet, i do hope you are succeeding with al.

xx

[available]

Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

Ahhh NS and here i was sitting with my tea thinking you had been slacking off. I should know you would not let me down, so now i have to go and get another cuppa and read and reply gorgeous woman.

Thank you so much for remembering my 60 days, i think i am actually quite speechless, i feel it is someone else who has done these days, not me, god i could never achieve anything that i set my mind to let alone giving up al. But hey i have and i am just being Ava cruising along with not much to say!

thanks for sharing what Tree said and you stated. I had not thought of that sort of stress being thrown at me and i dont have a plan at all so maybe i should work on that one. I remember when my step father died who i loved dearly and was like a true father that i drank 4 bottles of wine to dull the ache the day of his funeral, wont mention how many from when he died to afterwards. I know he would be so proud of me now and of his grandchildren. Like us all i need to find a way of dealing with that level of pain in my life without drowning in al. So much to do and hopefully so much time.

Eat away NS, sounds pretty healthy though. I would love to be sitting with you devouring the food, as long as you made it though for me. I was going to say i will keep our glasses filled while you are preparing but with non al drinks of course. Seafood is so my fav food.

Thank you NS for all of your support and love and i wish you would stop making me tear up!

Hugs xxx

[j-vo]

Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

:woot::kudos::cheering:Ava!!! 60 days is amazing!!! You are amazing!!! Congratulations, dear friend!!!

[narilly]

Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

AVA, 60 days Wohooo!!!!
Way to go Sista!

[HumbleRider]

Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

Yay, Ava!

[patrice]

Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

Fantastic Ava - 60 days is just fab!!!!

[HumbleRider]

Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

Okay ladies, I'm feeling agitated this afternoon for no reason and need something to take my mind off it. I'm going into the toolbox and over to the nest so that I don't fixate on the fact that I have spare time right now that could be taken up getting drunk. Not that I will drink, just that I have that pre-blotto anxiety creeping up on me.

[j-vo]

Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

That's a great idea Humble. You are going to get rid of that nagging thought by reading the toolbox and you came here and stated how you were feeling. Know we're with ya, and if you need to pm me, please do! Talk, read, post. We've got your back.

[available]

Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

thanks guys for the congrats, it means the world to me, probably more than you will ever know. Its nice to have people that are actually proud of my achievements and acknowledge them.

Humble im on your back too so basically you are flat on the ground not moving as we are all on your back. Cant even get up to get a drink even if you did want one! One day at a time remember!