Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

[wagmore]

Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

j-vo;1698821 wrote: Evening Gloamers!

First day with the kids today and I have to say how grateful I am right now to not only love being a teacher, but for the absolute calmness, peace, and serenity I felt throughout the day. I can't remember feeling like this ever in my life, first, last, 120th day of school. It was a feeling of being right where I want to be. One of my team members asked me how I was so calm. Yes, usually I'm the one that's nutty, but I told her I took some deep breaths before jumping in today. We have another great class of kids this year. Another grateful thing. They're really chatty, but chatty and disrespectful are soooooooooo two entirely different worlds.

A few updates on me. I've decreased my anti-depressants. I've been on AD's for as long as I can remember--almost, with some breaks a long time ago. Not only that, but I'm off my heart medication that was not for high blood pressure, but for my anxiety. Feeling really good about that.

j-vo - Glad you had such a great first day with your students and that you felt such a sense of calmness, peace, and being right where you want to be. I think I can relate to that, as I feel much the same way in my life right now. That's also awesome that you've reduced one med and stopped the other completely! Woohoo!!!

[wagmore]

Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

Dottie Belle;1698540 wrote: Tried a new class at the gym and I was way over my head. I survived 30 minutes but was sweating profusely.....so will look for something else to supplement the other training....I must be crazy.
Too bad about the class Dottie. Keep looking - you'll find the right combo of training that's just right for you.

lifechange;1698423 wrote: Hi Ladies,
I've been holed up in bed today with a nasty flu bug that has caused me a terrible headache and overall uneasiness..

LC - Hope you're feeling much better today! :huggy


NoSugar;1698425 wrote: Glad you're doing fine AF-wise, LC, and sorry about the bug!
I just came across an interesting website you might like concerning alcoholism and nutrition. It probably won't be new to you but it's nice to have it in one place: Alternatives for Alcoholism.
Hope you feel better soon!

Thanks for another great link NS. You always seem to find the most interesting resources, and I really appreciate that you share all of them on here.

[narilly]

Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

Gals, I just lost my post because we were having internet problems.

So, I'm just going to say goodnight.
Xxx

[little beagle]

Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

Hi Narilly. Sorry about the lost post.:l
J-vo you sound wonderful. I'm so happy for you. Calm and happy. Less meds. You are definately in an upward spiral.
Wags your plan sounds like it should keep you goal oriented.

[Pavati]

Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

Hi, all:

Sorry about your post, Nar! I HATE that.

LB - That's a good thing to remember - Sober IS becoming on you...

Wags - so happy you found your new team!

J-Vo - I LOVE that we educators get two new years. I'm glad you're feeling so calm.

AVA - COME BACK!

xo
Pav

[wagmore]

Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

Nar - sorry about the lost post - I hate when that happens!

Pav - Thanks - I'm glad I found the new teams as well.

Now I just have to tell my current coach and team that I'm leaving. That won't be easy - I know it's what I want to do, and yet I still have confused or conflicted feelings about the whole thing. I think it's just one of my issues - I'm not good at saying no or disappointing people or walking away from things. I envy people who have confidence in this area. I'm very confident in many ways, but not in ways that involve putting my own needs first.

Sigh...

[lifechange]

Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

Good Morning, Loamers!
Just a quick check-in to say hello.
J-vo, glad your first day of school went so well and that you felt calm. That must have felt really good.
I'm heading out to the gym in half an hour for the first time in ages. It's always so hard to get back into exercise after having been out of it for awhile. But along with a better mental attitude, my shoulder and back feel much better when I exercise.

Wishing you all a great Thursday..

[available]

Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

Pav i am here, i have just been busy. Work has been crazy, i need a long weekend before i tell some very needy patients to fark off. They think they are needy but i have way more needy patients. lots of staff off also so a day off is not on the cards at the moment. I have been walking so that is a positive and the weather has been beautiful which is enough to make me smile.

Wags i am so like you. I hate disappointing people or confrontation but i am learning. Its a skill to stand up for yourself and do what you know needs to be done but i think that other people do it so why cant i be. We are a work in progress now we are sober.

Thank god its friday tomorrow, will have more to say on the weekend when i can breath and relax.

Glad school was good for you Jvo, in no time you will feel that you did not have any time off.

[available]

Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

Pav i am here, i have just been busy. Work has been crazy, i need a long weekend before i tell some very needy patients to fark off. They think they are needy but i have way more needy patients. lots of staff off also so a day off is not on the cards at the moment. I have been walking so that is a positive and the weather has been beautiful which is enough to make me smile.

Wags i am so like you. I hate disappointing people or confrontation but i am learning. Its a skill to stand up for yourself and do what you know needs to be done but i think that other people do it so why cant i be. We are a work in progress now we are sober.

Thank god its friday tomorrow, will have more to say on the weekend when i can breath and relax.

Glad school was good for you Jvo, in no time you will feel that you did not have any time off.

[little beagle]

Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

Honestly Wags I have the same issue. I find myself cleaning a house full of cat hair, tulle, and unimaginable clutter because I don't know how to wiggle out of it. I have tried to politely ask her to find someone else, but quite frankly she knows the issues and no one else will deal with that crap. So every other week there I am. She does pay decently though so there is that. Good luck with that.
Ava take it easy.

[wagmore]

Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

Ava and LB - I'm so glad you understand what I'm talking about with not feeling comfortable standing up for myself or disappointing/letting someone else down. Together hopefully we can help each other get stronger along these lines.

I sometimes think about what I would tell a dear friend or family member, and then try to do the same. In my current situation (which, admittedly, is trivial in the big scheme of things), I think I would advise my friend to keep the explanation to the coach very simple and focus on the practical (not personal) aspects/reasons for the decision.

As I'm writing this, I'm also reminded that I'm not responsible for how other people react or respond. I personally believe it is important to be thoughtful and to not purposefully or carelessly hurt or harm someone else, but as long as I take care with my words and actions, that's all I can control. I have been working a lot this past year on letting other people own their own sh*t - not trying to make everything ok for everyone (impossible). I guess this is another good opportunity to practice that.

It's all part of this AF package - learning how to ride out and move through those uncomfortable feelings and situations that are a natural part of life.

Have a great MAE everyone!

[narilly]

Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

Morning everyone!
Pav, I listened to the Bubble Hour yesterday too about people who have family members that drink around them. Funny, because as I was posting last night my hubby was having a beer on the couch beside me. It didn't bother me though, I don't like beer too much But if it was Wine, I would have told him to get rid of it or I would have had to go upstairs. That would be hard.

Wags, Lil B, I have the same problem about confrontation. Interesting because yesterday I had it out with my lead, I stood up to him. He was asking me to do more work and I handed him some of the work I had on my desk and said "ok, are You going to do this then" He just looked at me shocked. So it turned into an all day thing where he actually paid attention to how much work all of us were doing. So stupid how managers don't realize how hard people are working or don't recognize the 'Great' work they are doing. Instead they focus on what is not being done.
Anyway, yesterday I had enough and I told him so. It was good.

So another busy day at work.
No cravings here!
Talk soon,

[Dottie Belle]

Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

Hello ladies,
I used to have the problem of not being able to say no or no wanting to disappoint someone but that was surely taking a tole on me and I finally, somehow, got the whatever courage to stand up for myself. Maybe it was age and I just felt like enough was enough already. Not to say that when I do say no that is doesn't make me think a little but I don't feel so overwhelmed with stuff like I once did. I have to pull myself back so I don't over commit and that is yet another issue.
Off to get my hair done and hopefully toes painted. Some ME time for sure.

[wagmore]

Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

Dottie - I hope I reach the point you have achieved - of just being able to stand up for myself. I'm working on it for sure!

After some further reflection, I'm realizing that part of what is making me uncomfortable is that I'm not planning to be completely honest with my coach and teammates about why I'm switching to a different team. I'm not going to lie to them, but I'm not going to disclose the full truth. There really is no point in being completely frank, and I know that, but it goes against my nature and is creating some dissonance in my mind. I need to get past that, as this is NOT a situation where it will pay off to be open and honest - it's just not worth it.

The other aspect that is difficult is that I will still be working with my current team for a few weeks after I tell them I'm switching. Perhaps I am wrong, but I anticipate that this will feel uncomfortable, and I dislike emotional discomfort. Yes, another issue I'm working on, and very intertwined with why I ever drank in the first place.

I'm so glad I have a clear mind to sort through all of this and just sit with it rather than trying to do it under the fog of Al. Again, I realize that this situation is fairly trivial in and of itself, but it is giving me a great opportunity to learn about myself and to practice some badly needed skills without terribly serious consequences - it's a gift really, and I need to mentally view it that way.

[lifechange]

Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

Hi Ladies,
I'm glad that the topic of people pleasing came up today and to hear how you all deal/try to deal with it. My friends and I all seem to be people pleasers and are constantly reminding ourselves/eachother that we are allowed to say no. I guess it's the way girls are raised.. I know that even in these modern times, I "train" my girls to always be aware of the feelings of others, to be careful about what they say, even to put the wishes of others (friends, school mates) first-- it's such a fine line, this balance. It's important to consider the feelings and needs of others, but at how much of a cost to ourselves? --I feel very fortunate that I have Strong, thoughtful girls, who know their limits, despite their mother!! I'm also dealing with a situation at work right now-- I want to support someone, but I have to go so much out of my way to do it, that I think I have to stop. I find myself getting resentful and angry. I guess that's a sure sign.? Wags, I also tend to feel bad if I have to tell a half truth. For me though it's more because I have been such a liar and I'm trying so hard to be 100% honest--though in your situation, I agree that it doesn't make sense to lay it all out on the table. I hope your teammates will understand, be mature and allow you to have a good last couple of weeks.

Jane, thank you for reposting the post from Moss! It's perfect-- I'm so happy to have her back here.. I look forward to her returning to the Loamers.. I'm glad your mood has been up-- and without alcohol.. wonderful.

Nar, good on confronting your boss-- sounds like you did everyone in the office a favour!
Dottie, nice, the me time! New hair and toenails -- I've got a massage planned for my 30 day reward.. can't wait.

Hope all you lovelies are enjoying your day.. if not entirely, then finding the little things that are enjoyable. I was lucky today- the weather helped!