Simple September

[SnoopyC]

Good morning all...

Lav, I feel so badly that your DIL won't make any effort to mend fences, and in fact will punish you. You know your family dynamics, and if no one (YB, son) will step in, I guess it is what it is. It does take alot of practice to detach, I am a continuous work in progress. The debates were excellent, Hillary was calm, informative, measured, very presidential. Trump was unable to maintain decorum, unable to answer questions, rude, interrupted continuously both Hillary and Lester, and went on some rants. Boring, I wished he would have just shut up. Woke up with a headache today and I will bet you it is because my blood pressure did go up. Geez. I treasure my friendships here too, to be able to discuss drinking issues, to receive support, knowledge and help. Wonderful. I am lucky that I am so loved by my husband and kids, they just want the best for me, and clearly drinking is not in my favor. On day 37 today and there is just no way I can or want to drink. I actually do feel that I am free to be AF, a gift, and so grateful.

Pauly, glad you posted, that is what this thread is for, to discuss how to get AF, come for support when needed, and we are here for you so don't hesitate. Please, discuss whatever you need. We get it, it is hard, alcohol promises to make you feel better and never follows through.

Dill, hope you are in a better place, the weather has cooled off here and it is beautiful fall weather. Love it.

Cyn, what a wild thing to happen in the middle of the night. I always feel that when something like that happens at night it is bigger, scarier, and more exhausting (lack of sleep). We got some much needed rain yesterday, then cooler and sunshine, hope it goes out east so you can enjoy.

Super busy at work, so grateful to be AF to do my best! Have a terrific AF Tuesday.

[dill]

Hello All, looking forward to a beautiful autumn day here!

Pauly, don't hesitate to post here no matter what's going on. My way of looking at it is that "birds of a feather, flock together". Therefore if I hang here with other 'birds' who are trying to be AF, like I am, then their resolve will carry me along when I am weak, and vice versa. Just like in a flock of birds when a bird tires it drops back to a position where it can be 'carried' by the air currents created by the stronger birds ahead. I get it that you may feel like you just have nothing to say. I have times like that too. But hang in there. With us, please.

Star, yes a beautiful day here. I'm thinking of going to get my hair trimmed back. It seems to be out of control at the moment! LOL Other than that, not much going on to report. I have picked up my crochet hook again and am trying to keep busy at it but haven't come up with a real serious project. Right now I am making a "slouch hat". It's kind of an open work hat so not very warm. It's orange so it will be good for a Fall hat. Reading-wise I am still listening to Hawaii, but am in the final chapters. I have really, really enjoyed it but am ready for a change. I want to try the author that Pauly mentioned a while back. I think I'll go on the library website and request that today so it's here when I'm ready!

Pauly, if you did not post here, I would not know to look for a book by Terry McMillan. I have learned so many things from exchanges on this thread. Things that are positive and keep me busy and active in my af life. See why you are needed here?

Cyn, what's going on with you and your trees? Did you get any firewood from the one that fell?

Lav, I was so interested reading your reasons for why you started drinking: "hurting so deeply and for so long & basically gave up on myself". I know it is not the first time you have said it, but as I was reading it I thought how different it was from my own reasons, but we both ended up in the same place! Slaves to the beast! LOL. I started innocently enough. Drinking socially, for 'fun'. Then later on for 'relaxation'. Still, it progressed until the drinking was a problem. A big one.

OK, well. Here we are, another day. Let's make the most of it, AF!

[paulywogg]

Morning friends, I'm just doing soul searching I guess, I've gotten so used to being AF that when I've drank I feel blindsided, like where did that come from? Last night I was watching DWTS and I just couldn't believe that one week ago I chose to drink my night away and puke my night away,I mean who CHOOSES that? It's just odd to me and even odder cuz nobody forced me but I feel like it wasn't me if that makes sense? I guess I learned something from it at least, the debate.was boring, I don't want to talk politics cuz we had a friend leave the daily thread over political opinion but I was bored and felt like the same things were being said over and over,I'm tired of hearing about Hilarys emails, she was a senator for how many years, if it was an issue of her not using an official government email account someone should have commented on it years ago,also it bothers me that Trump has no plans just says "you wait and see" after everything, oops!! I did talk politics haha,well after this that's it! Hello to Lav, Star,Dill and Cyn I hope we all have a wonderful AF Tuesday

[treegirl]

Hi all - I thought I posted last evening?... who knows!

Thanks all for the lovely posts. Kuya, that is a pretty revolutionary piece that you provided us - thanks so much.

I really see how much fear there is in myself, how much fear there is for everyone in the world, regardless of our situations. I keep going back to the knowledge that fear is the thing that is literally harming us - that our cells can even tell the difference! (biochemists have charted it...)

So thanks for the reminder, especially during this political season where everyone seems to be extra-fearful, that our thoughts are just thoughts.

Let's keep on with sending love to ourselves and others, and try to turn the tide. I know how difficult it is even for our little thread - families stressed, confusing things happening, physical pain, mental anguish. It's really a lot to handle, but I feel that sharing things here is a significant help. I value everyone here (please stick with us, Pauly!), and let's remember that sometimes we're going around the dark side of the moon. We'll come into the light eventually!

Cheers all, and wishing you a great AF evening....

[Lavande]

Good evening friends,

Well, I did watch the debate & managed to keep my vital signs stable, ha ha!
But I did have some bothersome dreams last night. The election cycle reminds me that I felt exactly the same way by when Reagan was running for office, I couldn't imagine him in the white house either (with his hands on the nuclear codes). But we all lived, we survived. We both felt the need for a change of scenery today so we went to Longwood Gardens & walked around for a few hours. That place always changes your perspective, thank goodness.

kuya, thanks for the link.
It's something for all of us

Star, Dill, Pauly & Cyn - great to see you all & glad to hear we are all firmly seated in Sooty's Sober bus once again! I miss her!
It's true that we all may have taken a different path to get to this place but here we are together. Let's just keep doing the best we can possibly do together :hug:

Peace to everyone tonight!

Lav

[SnoopyC]

Lovely posts, thanks to all. I am running late so have to go, have a happy hump day!

[dill]

Good morning All,

I don't remember having much interest in politics back when Reagan was running. I don't even remember if I voted that time around! I was too busy starting our little family and was focused mostly on that.

I read that we are having a Black Moon on Friday. That is what you call the moon when it is the second new moon within one month, like a Blue Moon when there is a second full moon within the month. If it is not cloudy it will be a good night for stargazing!

Let's all have an AF Hump Day on board Sooty's bus!

[paulywogg]

Morning friends, just a quick hello from me,I posted in the daily thread that Kell's pregnancy more than likely will be terminated, I don't want to post anymore about it, just wanted to let you know what's up, I feel really sad but I'm trying really hard to think positive, like she wasn't ready for another baby,I'd rather it be now rather than later, her relationship sux,etc just send some positive vibes our way please

[Lavande]

Good evening friends!

Not sure how Hump day turned into such a long day but it did.

Hello to Star & Dill.
Dill, I started voting immediately after turning 18 - I was determined even way back then

Pauly, I hope you know we will all be keeping you & Kell in our thoughts. This surely is a tough time but as I mentioned before, you need to support each other. Keep yourself healthy & thinking clearly, look after Louie, that's all you can do right now :hug:

Hello to Cyn, hope you are well.
It's been raining off & on today with periods of sunshine in between showers. Seems more like Spring than Fall, strange.

Peace to all tonight!

Lav

[SnoopyC]

Good morning...

Pauly, love and support sent your way in this very difficult time in your life. You have been there for Louie and Kell, 100%, they are so lucky to have you in their lives. I was talking to someone yesterday about the reasons for tough times and we had no answers, only explored how people get through them.

Dill, I have been interested in politics since grade school, and realized even at a young age that who we elect effects every aspect of our lives. The weather has really changed this week, cooler and rainy, getting out the winter clothes and used our fireplace!!! Soup this weekend for sure.

Lav, why was your hump day so long? Mine was too, by the way. Hope today is easier. Nothing bad, just long!

Cyn, hope you are doing well.

Have a great AF Thursday.

[dill]

Good morning all,

Lav, I thought more about it and I do recall voting during "the old days" bc I can remember the place we used to go to to vote. But I wasn't as passionate about politics then. I did vote. I just don't remember who I voted for! LOL! My priorities were elsewhere. Re: your DIL situation, is there any chance YB will reach out to her. You mentioned the other day that it was hard on him not seeing the gkids. Could YB reach out to your son to discuss the situation? Or would that just make things worse?

Pauly, I understand not wanting to talk about your daughter's situation any further. Thank you for letting us know tho. I would not have known bc I generally do not go to other threads anymore. I send you my thoughts and prayers. It's a rough one. :hug: My only experience with toxoplasmosis was not a good one so when you originally told us about it I was very concerned. My gf's sister had a baby years ago that was totally disabled at birth, physically and mentally. The diagnosis was exposure to toxoplasmosis during the early stages of her pregnancy. They were totally blindsided. He requires total care. It's good this has been caught early on and I would rely on the doctor's opinions. It sounds like your daughter has faith in this doctor, unlike the first one she went to so that's a good thing. :hug:

Star, is your son doing any better with his nasal condition?

Cyn, hello. It was black as pitch outside last night! Spooky.

Heading over to visit with my son today and help him with some organization projects. He's hopeless when it comes to that! I'll be taking along a sausage and egg strata, on of his favorites. Let's all have a great AF Thursday.

[treegirl]

Morning all -

I'm here - just burning the candle at both ends for a few days now.

Pauly - sending you and Kell support and big hugs. So sorry for the sadness; you are doing good job re-framing the situation to see that maybe there is a silver lining, but it must be a shock. Take care...

Lav - Longwood Gardens sounds like a wonderful haven. I'm glad you could go there and get a little 'head peace'.Hugs to you too.

Star - sounds like you are busy! Yes, I've already put away summer clothes - had to get those sweaters out to get warm.

Dill - how wonderful of you to help your son, and to bring him some 'comfort' food. You are a great Mom - I hope that he is feeling a little more stable now; wishing you both well. PS - I'll be right over for that 'strata'!

I forgot how much there is to do with the house at the switch-over of seasons, and I'm not even getting to that yet! Just building my business, which is the right thing... but I've got to get a few winterizing things done too. Gardens put away, plastic on the screen porch, fill the mouse holes in the foundation (most important!)... Oh well, I guess it will all get done eventually. The cool weather coming on so strongly is a good incentive.

Wishing all a strong AF day --

[paulywogg]

Morning friends, Dill,thanks for sharing that post about your friends baby,see that's why I'm glad we have a heads up,when I first heard I tried to keep hope alive but being that the ultrasound showed development problems we can't keep false hope up,my hubs and Kells bf keep trying to hold on to hope but that's only gonna prolong this and the baby will keep growing and it'll only be harder!! I wish Kells body would've just rejected it,I've always been pro choice for early termination but that was for others not us,now I'm feeling morally guilty about the situation, cripes,I've got to calm down my heart is racing, I've got to find that rational part of me,not the emotional part,I care too much about everything and sometimes that's a really bad quality like in Lavs situation I'd probably be missing the kids so much I'd hafta kiss DILs ass and let her have her way just to get them back,I'm such a pushover and people take advantage of that sometimes, I don't blame them, Cyn,I need to get my house fall ready too,close off the window cooler, take care of some vents,declutter,etc,did get 2 bags of clothes for donations out of my closet and into my car,I'll drop them off eventually haha,Star,sounds like you're doing great on the AF front I'd be nearly a year sober if I hadn't mucked up a few times, that's something I am keeping in mind,sort of motivation I guess, well off to pick up my bedroom a bit,thanks for everything ladies, I'm so glad you're all here

[Lavande]

Good evening friends,

Dark, damp & WINDY here, goodness!
I had to pick up two fallen tree branches at the end of my driveway near the road. Apparently this weather thing is not over yet, oh well.

Pauly, I feel the same way, pro choice but if I was faced with the decision I know it would be difficult. But at the same time I have cared for people born with genetic & other disabilities & it's not something I could handle at home, long term. I just don't know how some people can handle all that, it's heartbreaking. Just know that we will be here to support you & your family anyway we can :hug:

Cyn, it hasn't gotten cold here yet just very wet!!! I am really hoping all this rain drowns the allergens floating around, ha ha! Plug up those mouse highways

Dill, I think it will probably be a cold day in hell before YB does any DIL butt kissing if you know what I mean. That nastygram she sent to each of us was overkill on her part.
I imagine if we don't hear from our son at some point YB might go after him. I just have no idea why he's been silent. Is his silence in defense of her or is he just totally baffled & embarrassed?
Your son is lucky to have you near by to help organize things, I know it's not an easy task. If you could see my work shop you'd probably have a good laugh. It's pretty much organized chaos, ha ha!

Star, I'm not sure where you are located but weather travels west to east so I'll be expecting a weather change soon, like yours

Wishing everyone a peace night.

Lav

[SnoopyC]

Good morning all...

Slept great, just up early so I have some time to post. Forty days AF today, on Sunday it will be six weeks and I am reflecting on how much better I feel, real moments of happiness, that do not come if I am hungover, ashamed, upset, sick. I cannot believe how quickly the weather changed, so much colder overnight, but I love it, today I am getting out some boots to wear with jean day!

Dill, my son went to an ENT and he did not find anything, after giving him really strong decongestants that gave him nose bleeds. So now, on to MRIs, CT scans, etc. He if functioning OK though, always attending work, taking care of daily needs, paying bills, etc. Doctors, especially specialists, just don't seem to know what they are doing, in my opinion. Have fun with your son and getting things organized, I love doing that. I actually need to do it at my own house.

Pauly, hope you are doing OK, what a tough time for you and family. Thank goodness we still have choices. Regarding AF time, after my last relapse, it was so bad, that I came to the realization that if I don't quit, for good, totally, forever, I will die. Period. Or want to die, feeling so sick, bruised, ashamed, and guilty. I want health and hope so badly, I decided to start counting, tell my family (close family only) and no matter what, make that commitment to thrive in sobriety. I look at Lav, Cyn, Birdy, NoSugar and all the others who made and stuck to their commitment and want what they have. Right now I know I am a better wife, mother, grandmother, sister, Aunt, employee, and pet owner. I am just more my best self, and that is how I want to continue. I hope that for you too. :hug:

Cyn, wow, what a lot to do around the house, we just don't have that much, not with the smaller house and lot. This colder weather has really hit me, I have been alot more tired lately, looking forward to stews and soups.

Lav, so sorry for the family issues, reaching out to your son is an option, the only option I see at this point. My daughter did not tell us about grandparent's day, and I saw the other grandmother posted something on FB. I was really hurt, but said something, and she said she told us. Not true, however, I just moved forward, took next Friday off, and we are going. I realize not the same situation at all, to put up with emotional abuse from DIL is just horrible for you and YB. Hope there is a breakthrough.

So happy it is Friday, my favorite day of the week. Yay!!!!!! Have a great AF day.