November Knowing

[Lavande]

Pauly, I certainly did NOT quit on my first try, not drinking or smoking.
I fell into the 'I can handle this now' & the 'I'll just have one' thinking many, many times.
There was no success for me until I fully understood & accepted the obvious - I cannot have just one!!!!! If I could then I wouldn't have been looking for help, right?
I think we all know this deep down about ourselves. We need to bring that knowing up to the surface & face it head on.
Another thing we all need to accept is that whatever we are searching for is already within each & everyone of us. There is absolutely nothing, no substance that will truly make us feel better for more than a moment. The best medicine for us is too take two steps back & away from any addictive substance. There is nothing to be afraid of & everything yo be gained, especially our mind-peace.

[treegirl]

Morning all -
Just a quick note to say hi, I will be back later. There are trains to catch and work to get ready for here.

Thx for the link - I look forward to that, Lav.
Paula - I didn't quit the first or maybe the tenth or whatever time. Not until I was done with the idea of 'just one'. I drove myself sick and crazy with that thinking for a long time. The true freedom is in 'not ever one', never. Life is good on this side of AL... After awhile it loses it's power - promise! Wishing you peace today - Lav is right, you have everything you need, right now. You are a wonderful being!!!

More later today -
Take care of yourselves, all![/QUOTE]

[paulywogg]

Morning friends, I wish Dill would come back I miss her posts, just wrote on the daily thread that I did a self hypnosis off YouTube last night and I'm always amazed at how heavy and relaxed my body gets,had a wonder why they usually always have a British accent too haha,missing Michelle too,I just think it's weird that she's over there and doesn't really keep in touch, I'm starting to wonder if the guy she's with is controlling, it's like as soon as she landed in FL he took her phone or something, oh well, been really tired lately but I guess that's what happens when you abuse yourself, shake it off and keep going! Hello Lav,Cyn,Star I hope we all have a peaceful AF Thursday

[treegirl]

Hey Pauly! Sounds like you need some good rest... I hope you have a chance to do that. Good for you for doing that meditation, it sounds like the perfect thing.

I saw an early evening star tonight and thought of Dill...

Lav, I hope you have had a good day!

I will have a late checkin tomorrow; I'm doing the train thing to the city again. I'm glad that I had a good session with a client today - then I don't mind so much losing another day to traveling.

Take care all - Star I hope you've started your long weekend, happy AF Friday to come.

[Lavande]

Hello friends!

Today was pretty decent, no complaints, yay. Did a little bit of everything including a run up to Longwood Gardens to see the mums. They always have a HUGE display the month of November. I really appreciate that place & being a member

Cyn, you are busy running these days. I love checking out the sky just before it gets dark, you never know what you'll see.
I hope your Friday goes smoothly for you!

Pauly, of course you miss your daughter. Has she been in contact with anyone else since she left?
My son used to do that, really pissed me off because it scared me. He knew he was fine & just had no cognizance that maybe we were a little concerned, ugh. Take good care of yourself, OK?

Hello to Star & Dill.

Have a peaceful night everyone.

Lav

[Snoopy56]

Good morning...

I arrived home about midnight last night, had a great week. Day 89 AF today, and going strong.

Pauly, I have been on here eight years, relapsed countless times, and have decided that this is it. I know that I don't want just one or even two. The people I was on the trip with had two drinks and thought they drank alot. Haha. We know what really drinking is all about. That is normal. I was tempted a few times and thought, what would drinking do for me? Nothing, except negative stuff. I wouldn't sleep, probably make an ass of myself, and then be sick and filled with guilt, shame and remorse. Sounds so worth it right? Plus, do I have another quit in me? So stopping and doing that cost benefit analysis is very important for me, right now. Tomorrow it will be three months, and I don't want to blow it. You can do it too. Join with me right now, I am here for you and want you to feel better.

Lav, missed your posts, but had computer problems the entire time. I was surprised, I loved Texas. It was welcoming, good food, nice people,and the reason I was there was interesting and worthwhile. I ate too much though, not good, especially right before Thanksgiving, that I have to plan for today.

Cyn, loved the Riverwalk, it was lovely. I took a ride on the river barge, went to the Alamo and the Spanish Governor's Mansion, shopped, and ate Tex/Mex food the entire week. It was fun and good for me to get away. I was getting toasty at work. When I went out, I just order my AF drink and no one said a word. As it should be. And those light weights just had one drink every night except the last night where they had two. I would not have fit in at all if I drank. Such a relief to be AF, waking up every morning feeling rested, honest, having faith in myself.

Hope you are all feeling less upset about the election, I mean the first days were just shock. I am still in shock but it is better. I know Trump will mess up our country, so glad to see the protests. We cannot sit back while he and his evil racist, sexist, etc., crew try to change our country back to the 18th century.

Have a great AF Friday.

[paulywogg]

Morning friends, great to see you back from your trip Star sounds like you had a blast, I am just in a weird way cuz if I'd have stuck to my original quit I'd be a year sober, if I had stuck with my next quit I'd be 7 months today, if I had stuck with my last quit I'd be 3 months with you,time to quit making excuses over and over, I like being proud of myself, I like being dependable, I like remembering life,etc,I HATE alcohol and the mess it causes, Lav,Michelle keeps in touch briefly through Facebook messenger, thats why I'm irritated that I messed with my account and had to make a new one,I could have just kept the old one on my old phone but now the email is all screwed up and I can't access the account, I'm so untechnology it's sad I can still get messenger messages on the old phone so that's good, Cyn,funny how we all think of Dill when it comes to the moon and stars, not sure what I'm gonna do today, Kell and Louie are both sick so I'm not sure she'll feel like going anywhere so I might just slum around here, wishing everyone a peaceful AF Friday

[paulywogg]

Forgot to say that I had started "woman stuff" when my mom was in town and she was surprised saying that she was done with hers by 39 right after she had my brother, so maybe that's why I'm feeling crazier than usual, I'm due for menopause any day haha

[treegirl]

Evening all -

Star - so glad that you are home safe and sound! I'm glad that you had a good time; I have very good memories of San Antonio. It's a good thing to get away and get some perspective, right? I also can feel the relief you have about waking up relieved and proud of yourself for staying AF. Happy 3 months tomorrow!

Pauly - yep, hormones are a real trip! Good luck with all of that. So glad to hear that Michelle is in contact with you - sometimes kids just get busy with their own stuff and forget to check in! You can do AF life, I know it. Cherish that knowledge, and keep it close.

Lav - how great that you went to Longwood. That is a great membership... good to have a chance to concentrate on beauty these days.

I'm pooped - this back and forth is getting me kind of worn out. I am home, in comfy clothes and not sure what I'll do tonight, but whatever it is, I'll be sitting still. I feel (in more ways than one) that the world is spinning around me, more or less out of control! Time to meditate...

I wish all a great AF night -

[Lavande]

Good evening everyone!

Welcome back Star, glad to hear your trip was a success in every way
Congrats on your 3 AF months of this, your forever quit!!!
Life is certainly better without the chains of addiction. Like you, I have ZERO desire to try that stuff out again. Let's just keep moving forward as a group & enjoy life as it was meant to be enjoyed.

Pauly, I'm glad to hear you have had some contact from Michelle. Geez, kids!!
You had a lot of turmoil going on all at once & lost your footing. Toss in the hormone disruption & that's how shitstorms happen - I totally understand.
Let's get you moving forward with a solid plan using all the tools available. The hypnotherapy is more helpful that you can imagine so be sure to stick with that. Another thing that really helped me was to finally understand & accept that thoughts & feelings will not kill us! Simple as that! They may make us uncomfortable, they may make us squirm & lose sleep but they won't kill us. Toss that thought around for a while
Whatever you do, do not disappear, stay in touch daily, deal??

Cyn, I would be tired too if I did all that you did this week!!!
I feel that world spinning thing too this week. Why not after the way we were all assaulted emotionally? I am having a hard time accepting that so many people thought it was a good idea to elect such a classless, dangerous individual. The daily reports of the deplorables he is bringing into high level jobs is simply frightening.
I have to keep hope that we will all be OK but I will not sit on my hands if I can send emails & make calls, do anything to resist.

On a happier note I ended up with my son & grandsons here for a last minute dinner & it was nice. The boys seem fine, my son seems to be lightening up a little too. Still no mention of DIL. Who knows?

Wishing everyone a peaceful night!
Lav

[Snoopy56]

Good morning...

Did I sleep well in my own bed! Had a good day yesterday and then the storms hit, and now the weather is more like November, cold, rainy, and in the 30s. High in the 40s. Brrr, out with the warmer clothes, right away. I took the day off yesterday, got my laundry done, shopped and bought my Thanksgiving turkey, then went to see my grandson, it doesn't get better than that. Not at my age! haha.

Lav, so happy for your that your grandsons and son are back! Obviously your DIL acts the way she acts at home and at your house and going to your house is fun! With good food and lots of love, of course they want to see you and be in relationship. Smart lady. Did the cooler weather come your way yet? Regarding the new government, all white men, all racist, sexist, etc. What could we expect? Now I hear he is paying off people suing him for Trump U. Of course,he would lose. He is dishonest and will destroy our country, I am not hopeful.

Cyn, I have to get my hair done, but besides that, will hunker down at home, I want to clean a few things, exercise, and practice the piano. I am making soup in the crockpot, so will be cozy and able to rest a bit at home. I think it will be nice for your to just be at home too. I am very happy to celebrate 90 AF days today!!!! I am so relieved to be feeling well, sleeping every night, waking up and not having bad feelings or being physically ill. The relief is worth so much, and I vow to continue on this honest healthy path. How's your weather?

Pauly, so glad you are back, your mother appears to bring up difficult feelings when she visits. Also, I understand your concerns for your daughter, that's really tough. You know what to do to be AF, and we are here to support you. I can tell you right now, nothing positive comes from drinking, not for us, not anymore. Everytime the thought occurs to me I have been thinking what AF will do for me, and except for the fun of actually drinking it down, that lasts about a half hour, the rest is horrible, won't go away, and lasts for days. Really, days of negativity for a half hour of enjoyment. Not worth it. I am committing to having an AF Thanksgiving, and would love to have you there. Lots of AF drinks, lights, music, and good food. Plus, football of course. You can do this, we are here for you.

Keep warm and have a great AF Saturday.

[paulywogg]

Morning friends, Star,no Thanksgiving football for me! I do like to watch the Macy's parade with Louie,I just hate when there's so many marching bands,gets boring, congrats on 90 days Lav,that's awesome you got to spend time with the boys,I won't go missing again I promise, I'm committed to this, every drinker says that after a relapse but I'm f#@$%&n done! Watched a show on Fox news called"Objectified" it was Harvey Levin(TMZ) interviewing Trump in his penthouse(gold and gaudy!) Anyway, they talk about items around the house and storytell about different things, I guess Trump had a brother die from alcoholism at 42 and he said he's never taken a drink in his life cuz he doesn't know if he has the alcohol gene,it was interesting to watch actually, I'm just staying neutral and not awfulizing what's gonna happen to the country, can't live like that and have peace ya know? Hello Cyn and Dill,hope we all have a glorious AF Saturday

[treegirl]

Morning all -
Whew, I went back to bed after feeding the pups, and am just getting up now at 9:30 -- that's a record for me! I guess all of this back and forth has been wearing me down.

Congrats to Star for your 90 days in your Forever Quit! You go girl!

Lav, how wonderful to hear of the Thaw. How happy the kids must be.

Pauly, it will be great to greet you each day in this journey. Thanks so much for sticking with it!

Lots and lots of leaves out there for me to deal with today, so I'd better get going.

Peace to all today wherever you can find it. It's allusive, I know, but we must keep at it. AF rules the day, and is one bright spot that we can proudly hang onto.

[Lavande]

Good evening friends,

Daughter & family came for a visit this afternoon & now they are stuck here, ha ha!
It was 60 degrees when they arrived thrn the temp took a nosedive. An icy rain started to fall after dinner so they are staying for safety's sake. She is still on crutches.....not good on icy walkways

Star, you sound great & congrats on your 90 AF days, yay!
Life is so much better this way, we know that for sure now! Enjoy the rest of your weekend

Pauly, glad you are on board with us & staying for the long haul!
This is definitely the place to be
Amazing to me that Trump can be such an obnoxious a$$, treat everyone like dirt then turn around & demand respect. He won't be getting any respect from me.

Cyn, glad you got some extra zz's. We all need that from time to time. It's all about self care, right? I haven't done a thing about the leaves yet & I don't care, ha ha!

Peace to everyone tonight!
Lav

[Snoopy56]

Good morning...

Pauly, I believe that this is your last quit, being totally finished is the key. I just can't even imagine what would happen if I go down that road again. I know that you have learned alot in the last year, and have been mostly AF so you know the ropes. Me too. Let's get er done.

Lav, how great that your daughter and family spent the night, how fun. The weather change went your way, and it is about time I guess. We went in the hot tub last night, whew, getting out was an adventure. I slept really well though, hope you did too. I liked and agree with your comments about Trump, no respect from me either.

Cyn, maybe your leaves will all blow away, haha. Take care and don't work too hard. Are you having Thanksgiving? Big shop today, so I better get ready making my list.

My plan for today is to keep warm! Getting out the heavier sweaters and fun boots. Have a great AF Sunday.