My AF Journey Journal

[Doggygirl]

My AF Journey Journal

P3, all of us - and that includes you - have such an amazing growth opportunity in sobriety. It is so cool that you came to all of these important realizations about yourself. That is such an awesome starting point.

I too sometimes think of my past in terms of all that was wasted on AL (and other stupid things / relationships, etc.). I'm realizing though, that I could not be the person I am today without every bit of the good and bad about my history. (and it's not ALL bad like most things in life!) I'm starting to like the person I am becoming. So I'm getting more and more OK with the complete package - for better and for worse. (I should have married aka accepted myself unconditionally before I tried to do that with someone other than myself :H)

May you have many more epiphanies that will shape the amazing woman you are becoming.

DG

[papmom3]

My AF Journey Journal

Thanks DG!! How amazing that Phil posted what he did tonite!!

[Isolde]

My AF Journey Journal

Hi papmom! I've read through your journal over the past few days, and I just wanted to let you know that I've found it really motivating! You've been through some really rough patches and still resisted the urge to give into the beast. Reading your posts has definitely helped me to stay the course on my own path. So really just wanted to say hi, and thanks, and congrats on so many days AF!! :goodjob:

I also wanted to share something that's helped me with sugar cravings - banana shakes. :bananacomputer:
Take some ripe bananas and peel them. Stick em in a ziploc freezer bag and pop them in the freezer. Whenever the sugar craving hits, instead of reaching for a pint of Ben and Jerry's, pull out your frozen bananas, cut up 2 of them and pop them in the blender with just enough milk (I use almond milk, but regular milk or soymilk or whatever is fine) to get it moving. You want the consistency of a thick milk shake. I make mine so thick that I have to eat them with a spoon. It tastes just like a milk shake, and is a heck of a lot better for you! I always keep frozen bananas on hand for this purpose. I find it very satisfying and very delicious! I feel like I'm being bad when I'm not.
I'll sometimes even use them as a meal replacement, if I'm not super hungry. In which case I'll put in a spoonful of almond butter (peanut butter would work too).

Another frozen banana option is to make banana ice cream. Pop one frozen banana in the food processor by itself and let it go (takes about a minute or so) until it's the consistency of soft serve ice cream. I like to top with some chopped nuts. You can spin it a bunch of different ways to change up the flavor. I usually will go for the shake though, they're less, well, banana-y. :H

They're both good healthy options and nice to cool off with when it's hot as hell out. Which it definitely is here in South FL! Feels like temperatures are in the 100s every day. 3 more months of this... ugh, I'm so over it!

[papmom3]

My AF Journey Journal

Thank you Isolde for the kind words AND the banana shake idea. Now why didn't I think of that?? . I'm going shopping tonite so I will load up on bananas and try it out. No more Rocky Road??? :upset:

I'm glad I was able to give you some motivation. Please pop in and let me know how you are doing. I'll be honest-there are days I really wish I wasn't on this journey and that I could go back to my old life. I don't want the consequences of course!! I know deep down the rest of my life will be so much better without AL so I keep plugging away and try to learn every day.

Thanks again for stopping in and I look forward to getting to know you.
Hope you were well stocked during the marathon reading session!! :H

[PhoenixRising]

My AF Journey Journal

papmom3;928219 wrote: Thank you Isolde for the kind words AND the banana shake idea. Now why didn't I think of that?? . I'm going shopping tonite so I will load up on bananas and try it out. No more Rocky Road??? :upset:

Hey, Turkey Hill makes a lowfat Moose Tracks that is AWESOME. :h
Also, have you tried making your own popcicles? You can get the forms sometimes at the dollar store (or get them online) and it really fun to make different kinds. I bet frozen lowfat pudding would do in a pinch.
Also, South Beach diet has a recipe for fake chocolate mousse using nonfat ricotta and cocoa. I've never tried it, but people rave about it.

[papmom3]

My AF Journey Journal

Thanks Phoenix!! All great ideas that I will run by the nutritionist I'll be seeing on Tues. It's going to be complicated as my diet has to be diabetes AND Kidney disease oriented and they are exact polar opposites in what you can and cannot eat. I will keep you all posted!!
:l

[Meech]

My AF Journey Journal

Hello Old Friend!

I know we have sent some messages in the last week but SERIOUSLY it feels like I haven't been on your thread in ages!

I agree with everthing DoggyGirl said in her post. Especially....
May you have many more epiphanies that will shape the amazing woman you are becoming.

We all have made mistakes in our life and what we learn from them is key. Boy I personally should be extremely wise by now :H:H

I hope the nutritionist appointment goes well on Tuesday. Bring all these great food ideas to discuss and see if he/she has some great alternatives so you "feel" like your getting your sugar fix some healthy way.

Welcome Isolde!

Hi everyone else hope you are all doing well!

I shall check in later Papster! :h

[papmom3]

My AF Journey Journal

thanks Meech!! So good to hear from you!! Posted on your thread.
I will definitely let you know how the appt goes tomorrow.
:l

[papmom3]

My AF Journey Journal

My Appointment with the Nutritionist

So here's the update on my appt with the Nutritionist this morning. Is there a smilie for "huge sigh of relief"? She was great! Not only did we talk nutrition but we got the "dog" talk in as well! She gets my passion so she understands the time constraints I'm under but the bottom line is that I have got to make some big changes and they have to be for life. That was one of the questions she asked: Are these changes for life or just until you lose the weight? I was also very very honest with her about my AF journey and the sugar cravings. She said they were very common when one quits AL and she gave me some tips on how to deal with them. The biggest change she wants me to make is to really watch my carb intake. I have a cheat sheet to use when there is no label info. I'm to only have around 30-45g of carbs per meal. Did anyone know that you don't really have to worry about the sugar amount on the nutrition labels? Its all included in your total carbs BUT if the fiber amount is 5g or higher, you can subtract that total amount from the total carbs. Cool huh?
I also have to up my exercise but I knew that. We talked about priorities and how I tend to put the animals first. Need to change that. I also need to really work on batch cooking on Sundays. All this was very good and important to hear but the best part???? As far as she is concerned, I am PRE Diabetic, NOT Diabetic AND as far as the kidney disease goes, she says that horrible diet usually doesn't come into play until you reach stage 4 and mostly with stage 5 which I hope to never ever reach. Apparenly if I were to follow that right now I would do more harm than good. She also said my sodium intake should be around 2500 mg per day. Livestrong had me at 1500 so that is great news. I think the hardest thing to do is to stop eating 2-3 hours before bed. That's where making myself a priority will come in
So, I am feeling a lot better and I hope the good doc on the 19th doesn't pop my balloon.
Just like with my AF journey, I need to make a solid plan for eating right and exercising EVERY DAY. Obviously no more Mickey D's or DD's and although frozen dinners are OK in moderation, they shouldn't be the mainstay of my diet.
Tonite I will finish up the PF Chang's take out and Ben and Jerry's :blushing: and then start strong tomorrow.

[Hippy Chick]

My AF Journey Journal

Hi Papmom.

I had to search thru three pages to find your thread so I thought it was long overdue that I posted.
So pleased on the good results from your appointment. What a relief! Isnt it strange that over the last thirty years fat was the bad guy now it is looking more and more that sugar and processed carbs are really what is causing alot more problems. I think the hard thing about dieting is that we have to eat. We dont need to drink alcohol or smoke cigarettes to live, but we need to eat so cutting back or restricting what we eat is hard.

Wow! what an epiphany...... realising that about relationships is huge. You certainly made me start thinking and I realised I am so similiar to you. I used to "binge" on relationships also. It wasnt until I gave up on trying to find someone that I did.

This site is so good for bringing up subjects to think about. I wouldnt have conversations like this with "real" people. Well, not without a belly full of wine first!

Take care and I will catch you around the site somewhere.

hip

[Pride before Fall]

My AF Journey Journal

Good morning Papmom! What a great post. I completely relate to spending years looking for people/places/things to fill in gaps I thought were an intrinsic part of my failed character (weak, stupid, fearful, fat, lazy, you name it). I now believe we're born with everything we need to thrive; it just gets coated in other people's crap messages about how we are or should be. Even well-intentioned parents, teachers, friends, and communities often muck this up.

You're strong, funny, and brave in my book! And the best part about putting dogs first--it makes you exercise.

Pride

[Pride before Fall]

My AF Journey Journal

Good morning Papmom! What a great post. I completely relate to spending years looking for people/places/things to fill in gaps I thought were an intrinsic part of my failed character (weak, stupid, fearful, fat, lazy, you name it). I now believe we're born with everything we need to thrive; it just gets coated in other people's crap messages about how we are or should be. Even well-intentioned parents, teachers, friends, and communities often muck this up.

You're strong, funny, and brave in my book! And the best part about putting dogs first--it makes you exercise.

Pride

[Hippy Chick]

My AF Journey Journal

Hi Papmom. You mentioned to me the other day about a thread in the monthly abstinence bit that you have been posting on. Which one is it? I just had a look and found your post on the daily one. Is that the one you are talking about? If so I will keep an eye on it and see what is happening there.
Hip

[finn]

My AF Journey Journal

I am new to this site. I need to share my feelings and would like someone to help me. I love to have a wee drink at the weekend to help me relax, unwind whatever you want to call it. Last night I did just that but ended up getting into the car and driving home. I got home safe and sound without causing harm to anyone or myself but the regret is killing me. I'd be feeling horrible today anyway had I not have done such a stupid thing. Drink always make me feel depressed and down for a few days after I've drank. I don't know why I keep doing it. Can someone help me?

[papmom3]

My AF Journey Journal

Hi Finn-:welcome:to MWO! I'm glad you've found us. I sent a private message to you with lots of suggestions to help you start your journey. Good Luck!!

Hi HC and Pride-thanks for resurrecting the journal!! I'm not posting daily like I was as I feel that things are somewhat under control now. but I will use the journal when I really need to get something down in black and white.

HC-yes it is the daily thread in Monthly Abstainers that I post most on. I also read and try to post on the weekly thread and I read the AA thread.

Have a great day everyone!! Meech-where are you????
:l