~cattleman cafe~ & another 24...

[Ginger999]

Thanks for breakfast, ABC! You know how I love me some pancakes!

We are having winter here too. Didn't get above 65 yesterday and the wind blew most of the day. Same for today, then headed for sun and 70s.

Waves to all my friends in the Cafe. I'll take another day of freedom!

[Mulburry]

I find sitting around a lake or stream quite relaxing as well dill and Jude,

I find this very much so as well. I suspect there is an evolutionary component to this: water sources would have been very important to our survival in ancient times (for water, for fish, for transportation etc.), so it makes sense that we would feel good (calm/relaxed etc.) and want to stay, when we encounter a water feature in the landscape.

[Jude58]

Happy Monday cafe! I'm in for another 24 hours of serenity...

[empyr3al]

empyr3al, I'm so sorry about your sister and I hope that you are dealing with your loss in a healthy way. You don't seem to care for AA much, and I'm just curious as to why this is the case. AA has really helped me to stay sober as well as this site. I know that many people shy away from AA because they think that it's too religious which I find not to be the case. Many of the members are agnostic but have remained sober for decades. Anyway, it works for me!

I struggled beleiving AA was the only way for nearly 15 years, that any medication was weakness and not sobriety. "Your best thinking got you here" is the worst thing i have ever heard in my life, when all I needed to do was talk out what was ineffective from effective in a rational way with a counsellor. Talk about gaslight. "Never have we heard of a person failing who has thoroughly followed our path. Those who don't recover are people who cannot or will not completely give themselves to this simple program, ..... etc. I was told not to ask questions, such as talking about medication, neurochemistry, withdrawal mitigation, which was taboo; it was insane. I have some trauma from religion not allowing me to ask questions nobody could answer. I was once told i was too smart for a simple program; at the end of this rant I will say the summary of 12 step I heard in less than a minute. So I solved my problems with science and evidence and medication. This zero sum game, "Oh you're only 20 days sober --- WATCH OUT" ... you know that amount of anxiety and shame is toxic and the reason I drank. Can't tell people how to withdrawal or taper? It took me a long time to dismantle beliefs that were not effective. There is something called Locus of Control - Do you think the world happens to you or do you think you can change parts of the world (yourself). --- This powerlessness was misunderstood as you are not allowed to have power. Infact, recovery is the power to chose what you do this morning. Recovery is recovering self control and building a life you avoided (paused) for years with alcohol.

12 step - Admit you can't control yourself, ask what you should do about it and be humble, list a bunch of crap you don't need to fix so move on, be honest, kind, genuine and care for the sick and damaged people due to dependency (not addiction) who have shamed themselves. Addiction is avoidance of an emotion or situation, dependency is withdrawal compelling you to not be true to who you are.

May regret this post, but I advocate for whatever way made you able to find some self control.

Happy 24 to everyone who's made it.


NAC is a powerful antioxidant used for cannabis and alcohol in particular. It clears the byproduct specifically of alcohol which causes the hang over and that sweet scent we get (ketosis).

I need to not get myself in trouble so I should probably keep it quiet but I need you to hear this --- we used substance to feel baseline, normal, or as a tool. Its not immoral; its just really toxic and damaging. We found the best way to cope as we understood at the time. You are much more than alcoholic or addict; you are simply held back from being who you need to be. Recovery is finding purpose, not a higher power.

Be kind, stay kind, we are all peers.

[Peachie]

You have some good points but I hate the anger and disrespect you show...in that you have to be RIGHT! I love the people on this thread and have been around MWO for many, many years. Not posting much but gaining strength from ordinary decent people who live their lives peacefully, respectfully to others in this community and many other communities. You come here yelling and shouting how much you know better then anyone else. Well, in my world, you don't if you have to shout it from the bloody rooftops. Seriously you have angered me, don't know if you have angered others here but you have angered me big time. I loathe people who speak like you. Take it somewhere else. How dare you come here telling people things they already know.

[abcowboy]

4:46am in Alberta, another 24 please, and thanks...

In the last 24 hours, these friends have joined in for 24 hours of wellness:
Jude58 dill Rava Ginger999 Mulburry empyr3al Peachie

Today is going to be a darn good day not to drink!

[abcowboy]

I think you might have something there Mulburry with the calming effect the different waters have on us.

I'm glad you're getting what you need from AA Jude, it's not for everyone but it has helped thousands and thousands get and remain sober.

We're on a warming trend up here as well dill, I might even tackle the garage doors this week if I can get the trailer back into town to put the old ones on.

I was a drinker from a very young age as well Rava, not sure why I couldn't admit to myself that I was an alcoholic a lot sooner than I did.

I think your winter is a lot more enjoyable than our winter up here Ginger lol.

It's great to see you here Peachie, you're more than welcome to join us on a regular basis.

Theres many ways to quit drinking empyr3al, we just have to find the right way for each of us as individuals.

[Rava]

Good morning Cafe. Well i just read a bunch of stuff this morning on this site. I am staying in my lane regarding the above conversation. I have nothing of importance to add. I am simply taking each day working on my sobriety with my friends on this site. I hope everyone has a good Monday. 24 more please and thanks.

[Ginger999]

I agree, everyone's path is different. The important thing is to keep showing up. I'll take another day!

[empyr3al]

I was a member of this community for approximately 10 years. I spent my entire time doing research and learning. I may sound like a know it all because I spent the time to do that. Don't take offense please; I'm not yelling - I am stating truth to cut the time wasted for most so they don't have to struggle like I did. I just know alot of stuff that I can't communicate in ways that don't sound offensive because intelligence and free thought is against the AA hegemony. If you have any questions I will answer. My sister died this morning, I'm under a great deal of stress; which maybe why I sound so aggressive. I appologize and I fully admitted that things like anger are coming out in a previous post. You can hate me all you want - I'm not wrong. i will leave the community again if its a problem.

I probably need support; why i sound so aggressive I the last couple posts... cancer is not a choice unlike picking up a drink

[empyr3al]

In a positive space; my sister is now free. We will take up the responsibility for her two twins 10 years old. Support her husband. Happy 24 even if its painful. Much love.


"When we align our thoughts, emotions, and actions with the highest part of ourselves, we are filled with enthusiasm, purpose and meaning. Life is rich and full. We have no thoughts of bitterness. We have no memory of fear. We are joyously and intimately engaged with our world. This is the experience of authentic power... when the personality comes fully to serve the energy of its soul, that is authentic empowerment"


Gary Zukav

[dill]

I logged on earlier, but didn't get a chance to post. It's been a busy morning.

Emyr3al, I am so sorry for your loss. These are dark times for you and your family. My thoughts and prayers are with you and especially with your sister's dear children. Please keep coming back for as long as you like. I don't know if you read my post from a couple days back, but in case you missed it I will reiterate that we here understand the struggle you must be having to cope and to process your loss and the huge effort it must take to get through all this and remain sober. I hope you can find some peace in knowing that your sister is as you say, free from her suffering.

Peachie, welcome. Feel free to join in more often.

Waves to Jude, Ginger, Cowboy and Mul.

24 for all of us here, please,

[empyr3al]

You have some good points but I hate the anger and disrespect you show...in that you have to be RIGHT! I love the people on this thread and have been around MWO for many, many years. Not posting much but gaining strength from ordinary decent people who live their lives peacefully, respectfully to others in this community and many other communities. You come here yelling and shouting how much you know better then anyone else. Well, in my world, you don't if you have to shout it from the bloody rooftops. Seriously you have angered me, don't know if you have angered others here but you have angered me big time. I loathe people who speak like you. Take it somewhere else. How dare you come here telling people things they already know.

The last statement --- how dare i come here telling people things they already know. Listen; I am processing alot of stuff right now. Please don't take offense. I am simply declaring who I am so I can believe who I am. Its that plain as day - You tell yourself who you are and you do that and you are that. I am in fact talking to myself (with some company and support from friends here) when writing on these forums and thats how I recovered.

Hopefully you don't loath me forever but you know what; maybe you need to speak how you recovered and make it loud and clear; because thats what I do, you should to. Step 12 - no matter what program.

[Jude58]

empyr3al, I am so sorry about your sister and can't imagine what you are going through.

Everybody has to choose their own path to sobriety and the one I use works for me. So far, the path that I chose is helping to keep me sober. Can't ask for more than that!

Peachy, good to see you, you should stop in more often!

Not today...

[abcowboy]

4:46am in Alberta, 24 more for me please, and thanks...

In the last 24 hours, these friends have joined in for 24 hours of wellness:
Jude58 empyr3al Peachie Rava Ginger999 dill

Today is going to be a darn good day not to drink!