One Step at a Time - February 2017

[paulywogg]

SoCali,the toolbox is in the monthly abstinence section I have a personal toolbox I use,exercise, journaling(a little book I write in) early to bed,vitamins, magnesium, meditation, being here at least twice a day,something is missing I guess,I've tried AA,counseling but in the end its a choice to drink,so gross it doesn't even taste good,barf

[NoSugar]

Pauly, I think what everyone who continues to struggle with this needs to do is to finally wave the white flag and give up the fight. You'll win by "losing". With that comes such relief and peace.

If you knew that taking a single drink would kill you immediately, I'm sure you'd always be able to resist, even when feeling like you did yesterday. You could resist in the same way now because the fact is, there's always a risk of death due to poisoning or an accident and it is a toxin that ruins your health and kills, just slowly.

You've sounded so strong and I was surprised to read you'd drank. Did this all seem to come out of the blue or were you building up to it but not talking about it? Or maybe not admitting it to yourself? I think it's important to honestly check in with ourselves and our support people as often as possible, not pretending things are ok if they aren't.

It's great you came right back and didn't drink for days. It may not seem like it but that's progress :hug:. You can do this - please never quit trying. xx

[SKendall]

Pauly, I agree with you. Not a thought about drinking then being drunk. As problem drinkers we are compulsive and maybe that's what to work on imvho.

Bad day for me. Went to knee doc in the same bldg. as spine doc. My appt. was at 9:00 didn't see him until 10:15, not a big deal but in the 3 appts I've had, my waiting time has been a cumulative of 7 hrs. It's a long time to wait on a hard chair with the disc issues. I was p.o'd off and told him so. The mri shows 2 cartilage tears, advanced arthritis and the patellar has developed an additional stress fracture. I was told I would need a knee replacement and he now wants to do arthroscopic surgery on the cartilage and then if things haven't improved, additional surgery. I asked him what the odds were on the arthritic issues going away and the patellar Healing? He shrugged and he is just drawing out this already long drawn out injury. Saw the spine doctor and he is suggesting a lampectomy (sp) to replace this discs and take pressure off the spinal nerve. There is a new procedure just approved by the FDA where they put in a stent about the size of a quarter. The downtime is less, but am I being a guinea pig?

I went to breakfast and my cap fell out. Went to Walmart and had my purse stolen, aye! I was supposed to have Vivian tonight, but I'm exhausted. I bought us chocolate croissants and pastries from La Madelaine, but I think I'll just drop them off so they can enjoy them. I still haven't hooked up the tv and don't miss it, but Vivian asked for the hook up so we could watch silliness. I am just going to do Roku so will need the hdmi cable.

I did manage to get a haircut and grocery shop without incident.

I hear the blankie fort calling.

[paulywogg]

Thanks NS,I know I have it in me..I know it,just so much in my head I wanted an escape for a bit,excuses, excuses I know that,SK,I'm so sorry for all the crud your little body is going through knee replacement sounds scary as does the replacement disc but maybe its worth it for quality of life? Kell has to go for her MRI this afternoon to see what's up with her back,I truly hope its not getting worse hubs has to get an MRI too to see how far gone his back is too,all of this just a lot to cope with but I guess it works out

[paulywogg]

Yikes about your purse being stolen SK! You've had a loooong day,blankie fort is open and warm

[Mick]

Pauly, I agree with you. Not a thought about drinking then being drunk. As problem drinkers we are compulsive and maybe that's what to work on imvho.

Bad day for me. Went to knee doc in the same bldg. as spine doc. My appt. was at 9:00 didn't see him until 10:15, not a big deal but in the 3 appts I've had, my waiting time has been a cumulative of 7 hrs. It's a long time to wait on a hard chair with the disc issues. I was p.o'd off and told him so. The mri shows 2 cartilage tears, advanced arthritis and the patellar has developed an additional stress fracture. I was told I would need a knee replacement and he now wants to do arthroscopic surgery on the cartilage and then if things haven't improved, additional surgery. I asked him what the odds were on the arthritic issues going away and the patellar Healing? He shrugged and he is just drawing out this already long drawn out injury. Saw the spine doctor and he is suggesting a lampectomy (sp) to replace this discs and take pressure off the spinal nerve. There is a new procedure just approved by the FDA where they put in a stent about the size of a quarter. The downtime is less, but am I being a guinea pig?

I went to breakfast and my cap fell out. Went to Walmart and had my purse stolen, aye! I was supposed to have Vivian tonight, but I'm exhausted. I bought us chocolate croissants and pastries from La Madelaine, but I think I'll just drop them off so they can enjoy them. I still haven't hooked up the tv and don't miss it, but Vivian asked for the hook up so we could watch silliness. I am just going to do Roku so will need the hdmi cable.

I did manage to get a haircut and grocery shop without incident.

I hear the blankie fort calling.

jump in that blankie fort!!!youll be safe!

[Mick]

gt to agree with NS...you have made massive steps and progressed...dont ever class it as a failure,you need to learn another strategy to use when that urge starts..you will do it...

[NoraC]

I have added another wing on the blankie fort. :hug: :heartbeat:

SK - I am so sorry. I wish that I could do something for you.

Pauly - big hugs. So glad that you got right back to it.

SoCali - I created a very basic word document on my computer. And I do some journaling there. But, I keep a lot of posts that resonate with me. I just copy and paste them right in my word document 'Nora's Journal'. I have positive quotes. I have negative things to remind me how bad it was one day and how wonderful it was the next. Anything and everything goes in there. Private - just for me. It does help.

NS - good advice as always. Mick - always great to see you.

Break is over and I'm heading home in one hour. I will be back..........................WATCH OUT

[Lizann]

gt to agree with NS...you have made massive steps and progressed...dont ever class it as a failure,you need to learn another strategy to use when that urge starts..you will do it...

I couldn't agree with you more! Pauly for the most part you are doing amazing. I know we can be our own worst enemy. Get right back in that horse and move on. :hug:

SK, I know that knee replacement surgery can be brutal! One of my coworkers had it done and she have a rough go of it. A friend of mine is also looking at knee replacement surgery but has also been offered alternatives. Did you get any other suggestions too? Back surgery too? Wow you've got a lot going on!

Nora, thanks for your positive comments and encouraging words. You are dealing with so much and still come hear and post positivity. Thanks for being here :love: how is your mom doing?

Mick, NS thanks for adding your wisdom here too!

Wishing you all a peaceful night.

[NoraC]

Pauly - how are you doing? Were you able to stop today? I hope that tomorrow is a much better day. I love you friend. I agree with everyone else. You have made massive improvement. Don't let this derail you. You are going thru long stretches without drinking. That is a major accomplishment.

SK - I can not believe everything that is going on with you. :sad: How awful about your purse. I hope that you can get some pain relief. I don't understand why they don't do a knee replacement. Do they want to operate on the cartilage instead of doing a knee replacement?

AG - Congratulations on having a fun time at the pub! I know what you mean about taking a long, hard look at yourself. I don't want to be that person anymore. It's not fun to see or be around. So, hot tea & ice-cream sound marvelous.

SoCali - how are you doing? Did you find the toolbox here? Great tools there. How are things going with your mom? I'm glad that you found her a place. We are not at that point with my mom, thank goodness. I know that it had to be so hard for you.

Liz - sounds like you are busy, busy. In a good way. Wedding & baby. I'm sure that the shower will be wonderful. It's important to make MIL feel part of it. I tried to find the move 'Proposal' on Netflix and it wasn't there. I love that movie.

WF - how you feeling today? Better I hope.

Techie - my goodness. Please explain about your ski pole since I don't ski. How did you lose it?

[NoraC]

HAPPY BIRTHDAY, RUSTY!!!!!

[NoraC]

x-post Liz. Doing ok here. Mom has had a couple really sleeping days. Then she has a hard time settling at night. Actually, she ended up going to bed at 5:30 this evening. I couldn't talk her into staying up.
I went and got my eyebrows/lip threaded after work. Oh - it's the little things in life. :harhar:

Hubby called our landlord again. Talked to the wife this time. He is supposed to stop by and look at something. It's almost 7:00 and not here yet. How long before I can put on jammies?

[NoraC]

Red - how are you doing? It was great when you stopped in and gave us an update on your life. I'm ready for another update.

[Lizann]

Happy Birthday Rusty:welldone:

[actiongirl46]

Rusty!!! Happy Birthday friend!! I hope you are having an awesome weekend.