One Step at a Time - March 2018

[Rusty]

Re: One Step at a Time - March 2018

How are you doing, Pauly? I know Fridays are your day off.

[paulywogg]

Re: One Step at a Time - March 2018

Everything is fine Rusty,thanks for asking

[Lizann]

Re: One Step at a Time - March 2018

Bird, upsetting that you had to work when you didn't feel good. You'd think they could find someone to do that one thing for you. Hope your resting and on the mend.

Pauly, did you watch the grandsons today on your day off? Hubby and I had Logan today. He's moving around so much now. He was trying to catch Lucy today. She was too quick for him, and he just wore himself out. Little stinker.

Nora, I know you're having a fun weekend with hubby. Anyone else have plans. I'm working tomorrow and that's pretty much it right now,
Have a great AF night!

[NoraC]

Re: One Step at a Time - March 2018

Hello everyone. I hope you're having a great weekend. We are having a rainy day. We definitely need rain!

[Lizann]

Re: One Step at a Time - March 2018

Quiet here today. Hope that means everyone is out and about enjoying the weekend.
I worked half a day and then did some shopping. I happen to love going through the clearance racks and finding a bargain. I bought a pair of shoes on clearance for 5 dollars! They're dressy, but I have weddings coming up and they're so pretty. Well, that was my exciting day. Off to put all the clocks ahead an hour. Hope you all remember to do that as well.

[NoraC]

Re: One Step at a Time - March 2018

Thanks for reminding me about the clocks. I remembered earlier but I had forgotten.

I've been in a weird place in my head. Almost like I wish I could find that 'numbness/relief' that would come with being smashed. Truth is that it was never 'relief' but there would be that period of 'nothingness'.
I started to delete that last line but since it's the truth, I decided to go with it. I almost want to drink. The only thing stopping me is that I can remember the awful self loathing. So, I guess that is a positive thing that I have some bad memories stored. I've had to play a couple of those memories back recently to remind myself that I was never and never will be a casual drinker.

[bird]

Re: One Step at a Time - March 2018

Hi all,
Well I don't have to change the clocks because I never changed them last time. So now they are all right hahahaha. How's that for lazy:egad:.....Nora I know how ya feel. I really just want to do nothing sometimes. Turn that brain off...thought about starting to smoke pot, but changed my mind. Just one more problem. Have been trying to remember what I did as a kid in my free time, and to wind the day down. Read, draw, walk...I want to be as I was then. I sure can't do any of that if I drink. Can't really do much of anything when I drink anymore...........Lizann, that is fun to find a bargain. I love sales and the Goodwill....so have the kids back at school and this cold still lingering a bit..back to work tomorrow. Not looking forward to it, but will load up on some sober audio to take with me and keep me from getting down. .....rain today, so I will get caught up on some reading......b

[Lizann]

Re: One Step at a Time - March 2018

Nora, I don't have to tell you it's so not worth it. We all want to fell that nothingness, but the aftermath is far worse. I'm sorry you feel this way, but I'm glad you shared. It sure helps me on my sober journey.
Bird, yes color, read and remember what we did when we were young to wind down. What a breath of fresh air, going back to my youth and innocence. My sister and I shared a room with bunk beds and we would tell each other happy stories. I would softly cry till my mom came into our room and comforted me. I listen to a lot of positive upbeat talk on xm radio on my way to work and it really does help. I like my job though, and that also helps. Right now I am watching "The Crown" and am so happy to have some sober time under my belt. It feels so good to be productive and present.
Sending you all hugs. Rusty, Pauly, hope you're both ok and not working to hard. Rusty are you working close to home this week? I put out my Easter decorations. I'm sure you're on top of that too. Have a great AF night.

[NoraC]

Re: One Step at a Time - March 2018

Thanks guys. I appreciate you understanding. Sometimes I don't know whether to talk about it here or not. I don't want to be discouraging to anyone or bring up cravings. But, it's just a fact of life sometimes. I am so very happy & grateful that I don't drink but it doesn't mean that every day is perfect. But, it sure is easier to deal with life without alcohol in the picture. :heartbeat:

Had a great day today. And we're about to have some corn on the cob so I'll be back.

[paulywogg]

Re: One Step at a Time - March 2018

Morning friends,Nora,of course we want you to talk it out here,that's what this place is for! Sure we can share about our families,our jobs,the weather,etc but honestly this is supposed to be a place to get healthy and keep away from the grog,I sometimes feel like we(not only this thread) don't discuss it enough,although I don't like to talk about al or al thoughts all the time,I sure think we do need to have more talks,I like reading the Army cuz sometimes they get in real good talks about it,I was gonna post to you yesterday but hubs was rushing me out the door to go eat,went to the 50's diner again Liz,when do you leave for St.Croix? Hows little Logan? Kell bought Romeo one of those mats with the hanging toys,he layed hitting and kicking for over an hour yesterday,it was so cute Bird,that's funny you never changed your clocks haha,I wish they'd either just keep daylight savings(I like it in the evening) or keep regular time! Michelle is back here staying cuz her and that creepy bf split! I found out that fecker is a felon!! She should be glad he just told her to leave instead of it getting scary but of course she's all crying and moping around,jeez,shout out to Rusty,Techie,Glassy,AG? Wishes for a fabulous AF Monday!

[NoraC]

Re: One Step at a Time - March 2018

Sorry about Michelle but so glad she has you!

[Rusty]

Re: One Step at a Time - March 2018

Good Morning Friends!

Happy Monday to all! I am working from home today but I have a lot of catching up to do because I have close friends coming over about 3:30PM. Lots to do before then!

Nora-wow, I was worried about you yesterday and SOOOOO proud of you for fighting off that craving. Oh yes, life is not perfect every day but way better without alcohol in the picture. Please don't think you were discouraging us with regard to cravings. Where better to talk about your journey in beating addiction than here??? You are our thread's leader and we could not have found a better one than you.:heartbeat:

Pauly-ugh, I hope Michelle leaves him alone, the little dirtbag! Why does she want to be with one of those "bad boys?" She must have a low opinion of herself, the poor girl. I loved your story about Romeo gazing at his new toy. I never tire of baby/animal stories. Regarding our lack of discussion about AL....would you appreciate more tips on getting through cravings, especially when we are faced with tragic situations, like you have experienced this last year?:hug: We all want to be as supportive as possible because we all care about you. :hug: I love the variety of topics on this thread. I got very bored with threads where all people would do is whine about their personal lives, the weather, and recipes. YAWN. I agree, I love the Army thread because they do get into lively and helpful discussions about sobriety. I saw that episode (new this year) of "Mom" where Jill is trying to beat her food addiction and then has an AL relapse. In the show, Christy and Bonnie are in AA and I did not like it when they said that Jill had wasted all the months of sobriety away because she had a relapse. No one can take sober time away from you and say it doesn't count. It DOES count!
[MENTION=2634]bird[/MENTION]-sounds like you had a nice weekend with your family. Delighted to see you post here.

Liz-I am delighted that you like your new job and have found serenity in sobriety. When do you leave for St. Croix? You know, we are all very jealous but we love you anyway. Hahah!

Ok, I have to get moving! Big hellos to anyone I missed.

[paulywogg]

Re: One Step at a Time - March 2018

Rusty,I haven't seen that episode yet but I gotta say I love Jill! She cracks me up they do say tho that a relapse puts brain chemistry back to day 1 on various things I've read,maybe it depends on if it's a one of or a bender,who knows

[NoraC]

Re: One Step at a Time - March 2018

I don't think you lose all that time. Still a wonderful accomplishment.
But for me there is no point. One will NEVER be enough for me.
I was laying in bed last night and realized that I can't remember the last time I had the pain in my side. The one that had to be from drinking.

[NoSugar]

Re: One Step at a Time - March 2018

I started to delete that last line but since it's the truth, I decided to go with it. I almost want to drink.

Thanks guys. I appreciate you understanding. Sometimes I don't know whether to talk about it here or not. I don't want to be discouraging to anyone or bring up cravings

You've evolved into such an important leader on this forum, and in this thread in particular, [MENTION=9757]NoraC[/MENTION], I can see why you feel that way - you have a strong sense of responsibility. And while that is great, your greatest responsibility is to yourself and you should use the forum in the way that got you to the fabulous point in your sobriety that you are today. That means posting - and posting honestly.

Frankly, I think that actually is helpful to all of the people you don't want to disappoint or lead astray. To know that even solidly, happily sober people have thoughts of drinking is a relief. It makes our own similar thoughts seem much less personal and scary. To be allowed to witness a person think that way and move past it without drinking is very empowering.

There is no way in our alcohol-focused societies and with the strong habits we had that it isn't going to occur to us that we'd like to drink. Add in some extra stress, a celebration, or in my case, an upcoming longish period of time blissfully alone, and of course the thought of drinking is going to pop up. I went so far as to actively think about it for awhile. I didn't just dismiss the random idea, as I usually do, but considered whether I should run that experiment next weekend. At some point I realized how silly I was being and went with NO as the answer. With what I understand about myself now, choosing to drink would never be a rationale decision. But I'm not beating myself up for my thoughts - they weren't real things and I don't have to act on them.

I hope you're thinking (and feeling) better today. xx, NS