Newbies Nest

[not tonight]

Hello everyone,

Finally a quiet morning before I start the day. I am at what I believe is a fork in the road with my work. I feel the need to make a change, and as my husband and I work together, this change will have it's complications. But I can't stay in the position I am in and maintain my mental health. One of the things I always find so challenging about getting sober, is coming face to face with things in my life that make me feel trapped. So I am gong to allow myself time today to really explore new options, in order to find some means of taking back control.

Moss Rose - I am so sorry that life is so hard for you and your family. I hope you will feel comfortable coming to this forum and really unloading when you need to, I will defiantly make myself available to listen. You have a great deal on your shoulders, and are doing a great job not giving into alcohol. When by brother in law died a few years ago, I was going through a sober patch, and if I had been drinking I would have been of no use to my sister. I will keep you and your family in my prayers.

Dutch I hope you had a good time at the comedy show. The few times I have gone to a show sober, I enjoyed it so much more, as my attention was on the entrainment rather than the intermission and the nearest bar. Also, I did not run the risk of dozing off in the second half of the show due to the fourth glass of wine I would have scarfed down.

Well, time to get to work. I am very grateful to everyone on this site for the support which is enabling me to re-build my life around sobriety. Hope everyone has a great day.

Peace

[Lavande]

Good morning Nesters,

Thinking of you MossRose :hug:
Life certainly does throw hurdles & challenges at us & we get to choose how we handle them.
Interestingly, I found this note from the Universe in my email this moring:

You didn't choose this lifetime, Lav, thinking it would be without challenges. You chose it, in large part, for the challenges you now have.

You've got it made,
The Universe

Please continue to come here for support!

Wishing everyone a good AF Thursday!

Lav

[Byrdlady]

Havent had a chance to read back but wanted to check in.
Went out with some manufacturers reps last night who attended the same training class and REALLY got pressured to join in the drinks! One guy got up and said, 'you need a wine!' I said, no, Im just fine, REALLY. Three times...oh just have one, BE SOCIAL with us! I said, Im sitting here talking up a storm, I really dont want one and besides, I love it, but IT doesn't love me, and I pointed to my tummy ( as if I had an ulcer or something). Nothing else said.
It IS possible to survive without AL in business!
Hugs to all! Byrdie

[jane27]

My wife surprised me with tickets to my favorite comedian for this Saturday.... normally I would be excited except it's a two drink minimum and it just filled me with dread going and ordering water or soda for the two hour show. For me going and seeing comedian and drinking always went hand in hand, I'm actually not excited but more like dreading going. I'm worried it won't by enjoyable sober or I might order a drink. The only thing I keep telling myself is let's try this normally alcohol filled night sober and see if it's just as fun.

Dutch, I have been in this situation and opted to avoid going. It all comes down to how strong you feel in your quit. During months 1-6, the anxiety and dread were huge red flags. It's great that youve come here to the Nest to lay it out and get everyone's feedback. Take it all in. What I hear in your post is fear and lack of trust in yourself. Maybe it's too soon to cross the Comedy Club bridge? There will be plenty more comedians to see when your sober legs are stronger. Good luck, and stay close to the nest.

[Overit-still]

Good job Byrdie.

Good morning everyone. MossRose-I hope you are waking up to a little brighter day today. Like someone said, we can't change our circumstances but we can choose how to react to them. I know, big words from the lady hiding under the bag, huh?

Someone listed some supplements at one point to help heal these tortured bodies. Will you please repost. I can sleep 12 hours a night, take a nap during the day, and still feel tired. I am having blood tests done in a few weeks to check different levels but really need to get back on the vitamin kick.

Sleepy today, really dragging but had a WONDERFUL evening with my husband. I left him a love not by his coffee this AM. I hope it continues.

Gotta get busy. Have a great day everyone.:fatigue:

[jane27]

Went out with some manufacturers reps last night who attended the same training class and REALLY got pressured to join in the drinks! One guy got up and said, 'you need a wine!' I said, no, Im just fine, REALLY. Three times...oh just have one, BE SOCIAL with us!
Hugs to all! Byrdie

God Byrdie, how annoying. He must really be in the throes of infatuation with AL. I've been watching the series Brothers and Sisters. I love it, but God do they drink every 5 seconds. It's shit like that that made me feel like it was ok and normal.
Each and every scenario where AL temptation pops into the scenario is one that we need to be prepared to deal with. Thanks for sharing with us how you dealt with it! Xoxo

[Overit-still]

I think Dutch's event is this Saturday.

Also, I keep forgetting to mention that I actually look forward to logging on here first thing in the AM as opposed to Facebook now.

[Dutch1988]

Overit I feel the same way, I feel like it helps to keep me on track, I haven't noticed with past quits something early in the day can build the snowball of me wanting to drink, and buy the end of my workday it's not even a question anymorE. I still scroll facebook after work, though haha

Yeah I have till Saturday to figure out if I want to go. Im pretty much going to go, at least I have a plan for this Saturday, I just have to not drink. Friday-Sunday if I sit around the house I am pretty much fighting a craving by 5pm. I even caught myself staying at work longer last Friday, and very much think I am trying to bury myself in my work. Again, thanks for all the advice folks, it has really helped me feel more confident about going and focusing on other things.

[Hanna]

Just a quick check in. Ready for another day. Not so good in the personal department, but holding on in the drinking department. Just trying to keep on breathing.

Hope you are all having a good day.

[Overit-still]

Hanna-hang in there.

Dutch, I'm thankful this is my busy season at work. I too purposely hang out here longer on the weekends just to get past a certain time. When I know I'm safe for the rest of the evening, I head that direction. But then I'm trying to be 100% present when I do get home. (which can be hard to switch gear.) For right now, whatever works. At least it's spring and I can start working outdoors with my hands more and really spend time with my animals.

[Rahulthesweet]

Hi all was in Bangkok. Walked into 7 11 store to grab a diet coke.

"Excuse me sir, can you tell me which one is thai beer ... ? Good one please ..!"

Yeah sure ... Try singha ...

Hmmm ... I now have such a neutral attitude towards AL. I was surprised as I was not at all affected or tempted by this incident. I replied with almost instant as if I am an expert. Well I sure was ....

I am so pleased ... I with with my coke zero and a grin on my face

Take care all ..

[Resolve]

Sitting at the airport with a little downtime (a Rahul like post!) and had time for a quick bite. Ordered a burger and found myself staring at the bucket of beers on ice at the counter. Not my DOC but sure looked tempting with March Madness games on in the background. For anyone not in the US, this is the kickoff of a big national college basketball tourney weekend, or another great reason to drink. So I chose a table where the pillar blocks the view of the bucket and came here instead with a bottle of h2o. A little sigh, but I'd rather have all my picks and brackets blown immediately rather than have a cold something else and blow my sobriety.

This AF business isn't always fun and isn't always easy is it. We need to have our mental pillars up and ready as we keep our foundation and commitment strong. This wasn't a big deal, but it reminds me that as I travel or find myself out of my bubble to be more aware that although I can't control my surroundings, I can control my decisions.

Don't give into the madness!

[LilBit]

Many thanks to the Nesters, old and new, who contribute such great wisdom and advice to this thread. I will definitely apply Turnagain's reframing technique to many areas of my life. And Byrdie's "...I like it but it doesn't like me" while patting stomach comment will also be copiously used. I just dare someone to pursue it further after that one! My goodness, I'm getting back to my old feisty self now that the zombification is wearing off.

Thinking of you all, especially Hanna and MossRose. Keep looking up.

LB

[A new page]

Havent had a chance to read back but wanted to check in.
Went out with some manufacturers reps last night who attended the same training class and REALLY got pressured to join in the drinks! One guy got up and said, 'you need a wine!' I said, no, Im just fine, REALLY. Three times...oh just have one, BE SOCIAL with us! I said, Im sitting here talking up a storm, I really dont want one and besides, I love it, but IT doesn't love me, and I pointed to my tummy ( as if I had an ulcer or something). Nothing else said.
It IS possible to survive without AL in business!
Hugs to all! Byrdie

Pointed to your tummy???? Maybe he thought you were "with child"???? :congratulatory:

[available]

Byrd, i bet you wanted to push his glass of al down his throat to shut him up!

Rahul, i am off to alkie paradise in 4 weeks (thailand) and i know this holiday will be so much more settled than last year. I just cant wait to get away and relax and know that i will not be suffering the brain madness of "will i drink", "wont i drink".

Hanna keep posting on here, you are sounding stressed and when stressed the "feck its" can work their way in, especially in the early days as you know. I am fanatically on here atm to keep myself accountable. i know the drill and will take whatever it takes to hold on to my sobriety.

MR sorry that you are going through some rough times. I find that things just start going well and then BOOM down it goes. I suppose its called "life" but damn it sucks some days. So happy about your son though, what a massive step forward. I have such a great relationship with all of my children but more so now i am totally sober. They are so proud of me and now tell others that their mum is an alcoholic and has given up. Before it was always hidden and not talked about by them or me (i wasnt really one!, uh ummmm).

Overit, i was a fb fanatic in my drinking days but mwo is where i log on first thing in the morning and last thing at night. I am happy that i dont post any more cringe worthy posts on fb.

Friday here and glad this week is over, time for some Linda relaxation and i get my pup home for the weekend which will be lovely.

Take care all, be strong.