Newbies Nest

[Guitarista]

Re: Newbies Nest

"But you don't understand!" we spluttered, trying to cover up. "I'm different! I've really got it rough!" We used these lines over and over in our active addiction, either trying to escape the consequences of our actions or avoid following the rules that applied to everyone else. We may have cried them at our first meeting. Perhaps we've even caught ourselves whining them recently.

So many of us feel different or unique. As addicts, we can use almost anything to alienate ourselves. But there's no excuse for missing out on recovery, nothing that can make us ineligible for the program- not a life-threatening illness, not poverty, not anything. There are thousands of addicts who have found recovery despite the real hardships they've faced. Through working the program, their spiritual awareness has grown, in spite of-or perhaps in response to those hardships.

Our individual circumstances and differences are irrelevant when it comes to recovery. By letting go of our uniqueness and surrendering to this simple way of life, we're bound to find that we feel a part of something. And feeling a part of something gives us the strength to walk through life, hardships and all.

Just for Today: I will let go of my uniqueness and embrace the principles of recovery I have in common with so many others. My hardships do not exclude me from recovery; rather, they draw me into it.

Hola nesters,

This is very true of most of us Pav. AA/NA 12 step programs are full of common sense and straightforward practical wisdom trialled and errorred for over 80 years! So we know a thing or two. We don't need to be religious, talk, share, have a sponsor, go to meetings every day. We can 'take what we need, and leave the rest'. 12 step literature is great reading especially if you are feeling lost and need a path forward. Another path forward and out of misery and suffering are buddhist texts and any Yoga practice. The science is in. We don't need to reinvent the wheel. We have the knowledge. We can try it or not. Gratitude thinking/list/journal (DAILY!) is another proven way up and out of misery and suffering.

Welcome back Belle.

Welcome back Mashed spuds. Reclaim your precious lives mi amiga's.

Just do your best friends.

[Lavande]

Re: Newbies Nest

Greetings Nesters,

Sitting in front of a fire tonight ~ chilly
Gratitude has helped me all along the way since climbing out of my self-imposed confinement. My pity party kept me away from my true life for about 10 years. Only now can I say that what I was doing was attempting to drink away depression & anxiety. Nothing else worked for me & for a time a few glasses of wine did help, then it didn’t. Then it all just got so out of control I didn’t know what to do with myself. The only thing I could think of was ‘starting over’ with a clean AF slate & that’s what I did. I figured the people in my life could like it or lump it. I had to take care of me first, so that’s what I did & am still doing. For that I am forever grateful!!!!

Hello to all & wishing everyone a safe night in the nest!

Lav

[Byrdlady]

Re: Newbies Nest

G-Man, what you state above is WORD.
We are all unique in the same way around here! I thought I was different, too. I’m in the business world, drinking is a culture in business. I live in a vacation spot, no way I can NOT drink, right? Wrong. I saw what I wanted to see. I wanted a reason to justify my drinking and my inability to stop. The plain and simple truth is that I am addicted to AL. Nothing more, nothing less. That is the power of addiction. Turns out, everybody else wasn’t drinking. Oy

Got the Christmas decorations up. Many years, I used that as a big excuse to drink all day. Glad all that is behind me. Those weren’t the days.
Happy Sattdy, all! Byrdie

[wagmor]

Re: Newbies Nest

Welcome mashed taters! We're glad you're here. Strap yourself in, post regularly, and you'll have the entire "quit power" of the nest helping you out!

Belle - glad to see you as well. I hope things settle down soon for both of your kids. As Ava said, you'll soon have two wonderful young adults out in the world. It sounds like you've done a loving job raising them, and sometimes we have to learn from mistakes, ends of relationships, choices, etc. It's the only way to learn how to do it better in the future right? Doesn't make any of it easy now, for them or for you.

LC - sounds really frustrating with your credit card. Do you know which traffic violations they were referring to? Seems rather odd - how would they know your card number to charge? I hope you're able to get things straightened out. I'm in a similar battle with the hand therapy clinic where I got treatment 2.5 years ago after my car accident. They sent me a statement out of the blue this past Sept claiming I owed about $300. What????? I haven't been there in over 2 years! Anyway, I feel your pain and hope we're both squared away soon.

Byrdie - congrats on the xmas decorations! Will you have a quiet thanksgiving or a bustling one?

Ava - what are these supplements that changed your life? That piques my interest - always looking for life changing things. Anything to do with dealing with menopause? If so, I'm even more interested...

Hellos and waves to Pav, Nar, Lav, NS, G-dude, Pauly, Nursie, Mr V, and everyone else stopping by the nest. Have fantastic rest of your weekends!

[Nursie]

Re: Newbies Nest

Just woke up from a drinking dream. Happy it was just a dream!
I had planned on cleaning all day today, but a combination of laze and not feeling well had me in bed at 5pm. Followed by feverish sweats, aches, and dreams. I guess I was coming down with something.
So tomorrow I will clean and hopefully kicked the sickness to the curb!
Xoxo

[lifechange]

Re: Newbies Nest

Hi Nesters!

Quiet day in the Nest yesterday! Everyone getting ready for T-day and out Christmas shopping? I have to say that I don't miss that.. the very early push to buy for Christmas. It seems to begin a bit later here.
Pauly, :hug: Hang in there! I like Pav's idea of just letting it be, not trying to fight it. Or how about taking your own music/headphones when you go shopping? Those noise reduction kind of headphones?
Great posts, Pav, Lav, Gman.. I was one of the people who thought I was "different".. Now I'm happy to have a better and deeper understanding about my ways of thinking. Baby steps, baby steps, just doing what I can.. following in the footsteps of all of you, one day at a time.:happy2:
Welcome back, Mashed Potatoes! Good to have you here!
What a relief to wake up from a dream like that, Nursie!

Wishing everyone a nice Sunday.. My plan today is a whole lot of nothing! Finally!xx

[paulywogg]

Re: Newbies Nest

Morning nesters,Nursie,I woke up to a dream like that the other day too,in it I was arguing with myself if I should or not,don't know the outcome cuz I woke up haha those dreams are disturbing tho,Pav yep the day after Halloween is when the music started here too and my Lifetime channel started playing all Christmas movies ALL day in Oct 24,I don't even care for unfamiliar Christmas movies so I've never and will never tune in,had a huge incident at my daughter's house last night and I haven't been that angry in ages! I'm just at a loss on how to handle it,I can't change anybody's behavior or actions but I'm still upset,I came here and wrote it on my personal thread just to get it off my chest and it helped a little bit,I just don't wanna talk about it too much but then I don't not want to lay it out there either if that makes any sense,anyhoo waves to all and have a wonderful AF Sunday

[Pavati]

Re: Newbies Nest

Good morning, all:

We are all unique in the same way around here!

That made me laugh, Byrdie.

Sorry you had a rough night, Pauly - good thing you don't drink!

There's an interesting book called Why Buddhism is True - did we already talk about it, G? Do you like it? I would trust your recommendation on that one. Any other specific texts you recommend??

How are you doing, Mashed? I hope your night was ok.

Belle? How are you? Is everything ok with your son? Daughter?

Happy SOBER Sunday. I'll be cooking and wishing I was cozy in front of a fire with Lav and The Stella...

Pav

[narilly]

Re: Newbies Nest

Good morning, happy Un Hung Sun

That is funny Byrdie, we are all unique in the same way, lol.

I have been reading 10% Happier, it gives you a new perspective on life. He talks alot about Buddhism and I have found it helpful in my life. There is also a podcast called 10% Happier and that is interesting.

Mashed, keep coming back. Start checking out the tool box for ideas on how to stay sober. If we can do it so can you. It is really hard at the beginning because AL totally controls your mind so try doing things that have nothing to do with AL like: going for a walk, shopping, going for coffee, reading sober, swimming, meditation, taking a bath and make sure you are busy at times where you would usually drink. Change up your routine, don't drive by the same liquor store, take a different route.

Pav, I will join you and Lav by the fireplace in my mind.

I will be BBQing a steak and roasting Brussel Sprouts with parma and garlic. Should be yummy.

I am singing today at the National Music Centre here in Calgary. It is going to be fun. I am grateful to be sober, can you imagine going to sing with a hangover and smelling like booze? I can imagine it vividly and it will NEVER happen to me again.
Our choir master's mom died last night and he has gone to England to be with her so we will be singing for him :heartbeat:

Life is precious xo
Do not drink today, its gross.

[Guitarista]

Re: Newbies Nest

Hola nesters,

Hope things will pan out ok there Pauly.

Yo Narilly. I can't wait to hear you sing. I can hear you now. A voice full of wonder, joy, hope and determination with a steady timbre. :love:

Pav, no haven't heard of that book but if i wrote it there'd likely be only one page which would announce - 'Coz it's makes sense'!

Take care out there and have a bewdy evabody. You can turn things around with a simple daily plan, a little commitment, determination.

L8tr g8trs.

[available]

Re: Newbies Nest

Morning nesters

Had a nice weekend pottering and cleaning. i even managed to wash the outside of the windows which hadnt been done in 12 years, did some gardening, juiced up a storm and watched mindless tv.

Wags the supps that i am on are great, well they seem to be working for me when no dr prescribed medication did. Below is the Aussie link but they have other sites around the world. I did the online assessment when i first started and then again last night and there is a good improvement. I still have some symptoms but no hot flushes anymore. Its a lot about probiotics and your gut health. Lots of useful information and reading and a good fb group also. They are exy but worth it. I am taking the hormone supps, Healthy Greens and Tumeric and changing my diet.

Happy Healthy You | Changing Lives | Hormonal Balance

Pauly, sorry you are going through crap. I keep saying to my kids that i thought this parenting business would get easier, at least they are not as demanding.

Well back to the salt mines i go, my daughter wants to see me after work and stay overnight so that will be nice. Its lovely to have someone on the drive to work at 4.30am!

take care xx

[Lavande]

Re: Newbies Nest

Good evening Nesters,

Weird day around here. Woke up to freezing cold, then it started to rain, then it turned to snow for 2 hours then it warmed up to nearly 50 7&the sun came out. Only in Pennsylvania I swear haha!!

Great to see lots of folks checking in today, the nest seems to be bustling. I am not ready for Christmas decorations yet, too early for me.
Thanksgiving is a dud this year, no one coming over & I’m not doing all that work for just us two oldies.
Byrdie, you are an early bird on the decorating, that’s for sure.

Pauly, I absolutely hate disruptions with our grown kids. Maybe the best thing is to just back off & let everyone cool down. That method has worked pretty well for me, so far. Don’t worry yourself :hug:

Ava, washing windows drives me crazy, haha. Glad you got yours done

Hello to all & wishing everyone a safe night in the nest.
Btw - I don’t invite the Stella inside to enjoy the fire because I’ve never figured out how to potty train them, Lol

Lav

[wagmor]

Re: Newbies Nest

Sounds like lots of good weekends in the nest plus a few challenging ones.

Ava - thanks for the link and for filling me in on the supps - I'll definitely go check those out.

Pauly - sorry about the very difficult situation with your daughter. Was that before your drinking dream? Regardless, you protected your quit and took care of yourself. I can see why you're upset, but as Byrdie says, drinking *at* someone or something is never the answer. Stand strong!

Lav - that's some crazy weather you had all in the same day!

Nar - your singing event sounds fabulous!


Oof, This was my last hard day and I'm pretty exhausted. Hellos and waves to LC, Pav, Kensho, Byrdie, G, Belle, Mashed, gosh... my apologies for those I'm forgetting in my fatigue. Hope your weeks all get off to fantastic starts!

[lifechange]

Re: Newbies Nest

Hi Nesters,

a tired but Unhung Monday here.
Pauly, I'm so sorry to hear of your discovery. I can only say wihat the others have said.. that nothing is more important than your sobriety at the moment. For yourself! And for your family. Strength to you.:hug:
Nar, I would love to hear you sing! What kind of music are you singing? Holiday hits? Your food sounds delicious.. especially the Brussels Sprouts. Can't wait till we start to see them here.
Wags, you must be just about ready to relax and catch up on sleep!

Not much going on here.. I've got the afternoon free so am reading and napping and will make some quesadillas for the girls for dinner.
Wishing you all a good Monday.
Belle, I'm also wondering how you're doing today.?
and Mashed Potatoes?

Hugs all around..xx

[paulywogg]

Re: Newbies Nest

Morning nesters,LC quesadillas sound good Lav that makes me sad that your T-giving will be a bust thanks for your reply on my thread,it's a shitty situation and the guy just acts like he's doing nothing wrong-little asshole,my daughter feels like her hands are tied cuz if she leaves it's not gonna be pretty and I honestly see this guy wigging out and doing something nuts! Ava,glad you're feeling good,you sound really good feel melancholy this morning and I think it's just been a long weekend, hopefully this short workweek helps! Waves to all,so many I want to comment to but just know everyone here is appreciated!