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    Re: Newbies Nest

    NS - thank you so much for sharing that poem. It's perfect for times like these. I haven't released my tears yet but I will. It feels like 2020 has just been full of big losses. You're right though - there are many other ways to self-soothe, to cope, to escape. I think losing RBG after months of Covid and then 10 days of literally being unable to step outside the house due to toxic smoke was just almost too much to bear. It was a huge wake-up call that even my very strong quit can turn vulnerable. I will be sharpening and honing my tools over the next few weeks.

    Nar - you're right, I don't drink so there's no way I'd reach for wine or anything else. It just feels like we're trapped in a horrible nightmare, and I'm terrified that it's going to get worse. I'm generally not a pessimist so I don't stay parked in that fear for long, but this is about as scared as I've been in my life when it comes to our country and planet.

    Lav - the hayride sounds fun, and what a great discovery about wearing a mask to avoid sneezing!

    Ava - a non-drinking dating site sounds like a great idea. I think there are at least boxes you can check when you create profiles on some sites that let you describe yourself and also what you are/aren't open to in another person. I met my now-wife through a site like that and although I was still drinking at the time we met, I think that was an option in the profile creation area.


    Hellos and waves everyone. Happy weekend in the nest.
    Toolbox/Toolkit

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      Re: Newbies Nest

      Hello Nesters - I wanted to catch up with you all. I am also devastated about RBG. Just too much - no words.
      Actually, I read all your words about her and just started crying again.

      Wags - I agree with you...this is as scared as I have ever been in my life regarding this country and planet.

      We had an earthquake last night and I just thought to myself - what else? what else?
      (It was a small one but definitely shook us)

      Hang tight everyone. We will not let ourselves be brought down. :hug:
      "Only I can change my life. No one can do it for me.".....Carol Burnett
      ..........
      AF - 7-27-15

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        Re: Newbies Nest

        Good morning- grateful to be Un hung this morning. I actually slept in because I wanted to not because I Had to sleep off my hangover, and I love that.

        Wags, Nora, Lav, Pav, Byrdie, Dee, G Man, LC, Ava, Ken, Shades, Frances, everyone, we are having the worst year ever in terms the catastrophic events occuring in our world. Thank goodness we have each other AND that we are sober, we've go this!

        I am off for a bike ride and coffee with an old school friend and then to the market with my neighbour. Smokey still here.
        Ava, I like the idea of the non drinking dating site, I never even thought of that.

        Nora, I can't imagine how hard this is right now. Your mom and RBG passing so close to each other, xo.

        Wags, yeah I was thinking "what a great gift from a student". Obviously you are the best teacher to get a gift like that!

        Talk later gaters.
        xo
        Narilly

        "Nothing in this World Can take the place of Persistence"
        "You can have the life you want OR you can Drink"

        AF April 12, 2014

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          Re: Newbies Nest

          Hi, All:

          I am so sad over losing RBG - someone I admired and respected so much. What is infuriating is that the group in the minority wielded so much power. They are enacting laws that go against the majority popular opinion like LGBTQ+ rights and other social justice decisions. I cried and fretted, and now it is time to work - as RBG would. I still cry (thanks for the poem, NS) thinking that she stayed working through her illness to protect us. I know she wanted to retire during the administration of our first female president, but...

          I got a long hike in yesterday in the clear air. Wags, it is such a relief when it finally does clear - I know you have had it much worse than I did and I still was going crazy. I know you didn't drink because you don't drink.

          Lav, thanks for the offer. I don't feel like I could hand him extra large masks as a gift - it might be too awkward. I will see if I can get it to come up in conversation...

          Happy SOBER Sunday, everyone!

          Pav

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            Re: Newbies Nest

            Today is the first day of sun we’ve had in a while, we had remnants of two tropical storms at the same time. The left coast is burning, and we are flooding.
            The news of RBG on Friday night reduced me to tears, also. This year has been too much. Politics used to never cross my mind, I didn’t know enough to even converse at parties, now it has become front and center because we are all suffering the consequences. The double standards of our leaders is staggering. I have not thought of drinking, but I have eaten half a big box of malted milk balls. I need to put the brakes on that. I’ve done what I can to help, I have voted.
            Hanging in and hoping everyone is doing ok. Hugs to all, Byrdie
            All you gotta do, is get thru this day. AF 1/20/2011
            Tool Box
            Newbie's Nest

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              Re: Newbies Nest

              Sunday evening greetings Nesters,

              My grandson has returned to his home so now it’s just us oldies, a cat & a dog & a couple dozen chickens, haha!
              Cool weather, mostly sunny just like fall should be.

              If anyone is interested - you can text RBG to phone number 50409, it will send a letter to your senators to support not replacing RBG until a new president is installed. It’s a robot, you just have to answer a few easy questions. I have already texted Resistbot
              My senator is a Trumper so I don’t have a lot of faith in him but at least I made my wishes known!

              Wags, you have a lot of weary company in this country, honestly. We can’t let this year, this virus, this election get us down! There’s strength in numbers so we’ll all stick together, right?

              Nora, when i read you had an earthquake I couldn’t believe it but then again it is 2020. Glad it wasn’t too bad :hug:

              Narilly, hope you enjoyed your day!

              Pav, glad you got out in the fresh air too!
              I have to get back to my ,ask making - this weekend was too busy with other stuff

              Byrdie, I’m still waiting for my mail-in ballot to arrive but I will get it done & sent right back. We don’t have early voting here.
              The tropical storms are just ridiculous this year.

              Hello to all & wishing everyone a safe night in the nest!

              Lav
              AF since 03/26/09
              NF since 05/19/09
              Success comes one day at a time :thumbs:

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                Re: Newbies Nest

                Hola dear nesters,

                Geez, this is a tough year no matter which way u look at it or where u live. 3rd world countries already had it tough, and this year they have the added fear element of covid and social/economic restrictions in impossible circumstances! The climate is changing and we're experiencing extreme weather conditions and associated consequences. People in my community are divided, confused, angry and bickering over covid protocol, and accuracy of health information as the media floods us with various sources, some fearmongering, others kosher. Remarkably to me there hasn't been a revolution yet. Maybe there's a quiet one bubbling away yet to rise.

                As they say in the motivation books.........this is a time when our character is tested. For me there are 3 options. 1. hide away and drink, numbing out reality and the world. 2. Let life and other people take me in any direction it chooses. 3. Self reflect for a bit and plot a course forward for today and the future. Happy to say i'm taking option 3. I ask myself is there anything useful i can take from the current situation? If i'm angry and frustrated i let it out and express it. In a healthy way i.e. not lashing out at others or beating myself up. At the very least it's an opportunity to see where i'm at re self care and what i allow into my head from outside events and people. Where i focus my energy flows. I'm careful what i focus on and for how long.

                How are you doing Wags and Nora re the fires?

                Big waves to evabody. Take it easy.

                'I am part of all that I have met, yet all experience is an arch wherethro', gleams that untravelled world whose margins fade, forever and forever when I move'

                Zen soul Warrior. Freedom today-

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                  Re: Newbies Nest

                  Hello everyone,
                  G, I like your thinking. Is there anything useful you can take from this current situation? That is a good question to ask and much better than hiding away drinking. This situation sucks but would suck even more if we were drinking.

                  Wags, Pav, Lav, glad you are having some clear air. It has cleared up here too. It was a beautiful sunny day here today.

                  Byrdie, your weather sounds crazy.

                  Hello Ava, have a good day at work.

                  Talk soon evabody. ( talkin like a GMan)
                  Narilly

                  "Nothing in this World Can take the place of Persistence"
                  "You can have the life you want OR you can Drink"

                  AF April 12, 2014

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                    Re: Newbies Nest

                    Hi, All:

                    Mr. G, thanks for that reminder. That's sort of like the second part of the serenity prayer - helping me understand the pieces of my life where I CAN change things. Charting a course, and being intentional. I am sure you know this, but that has been a part of my yoga practice as well - being intentional. It helps. I appreciate your wisdom.

                    I feel good. I had a good night's sleep and woke feeling refreshed. That hasn't happened in a while. Phew.

                    Happy SOBER Monday. How are you Pauly? Haven't heard from LV in a while. Hope ok.

                    Pav

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                      Re: Newbies Nest

                      Hi Everyone,
                      I know I am not alone in thinking this has been the worst year ever. Living close to Washington DC, I am afraid of what will happen if the election goes one way or another. Insurrection is a possibility, you can feel the tension in the air.

                      But more than anything I have been AWOL as my son's court case has gotten more complicated. It is honestly the biggest waste of time for a Federal court, but so be it. After keeping us waiting for 4 weeks, the prosecutor offered a second plea agreement which was only slightly better than the first and not even close to what my son's attorney proposed. It was like they did not hear her at all. My son, god bless his stubbornness refuses to plead to something he did not do, just to get it done and over with. His attorney advises taking it to trial and son and hubby and myself all agree. Innocent until proven guilty 'beyond a shadow of a doubt' and his attorney believes there is no way they have proof to convict him. 4 weeks of angst, little sleep and plenty of tears. I have barely been able to function and have no desire to do anything. Thank goodness I had hubby hide all the booze and I refuse to buy any. But knowing what the path forward is, helps some. it is scary. I have only been to small claims and traffic court.

                      Again, sorry to vent this all out. I kind of keep it out of my real world except for my best friend. Everything seems so surreal. And why did RBG have to pass away now. My daughter says they should have just propped her up with sunglasses on until after the election.

                      If there ever was a time to drink it would be now. And I need to reaffirm on a daily basis that I won't succumb.

                      I am sorry about the passing of your Mom, Nora. It is hard no matter how old we or they are.

                      Time to read back before going to the office today. I still mostly work from home, but once in a while go in. Especially when I need more distraction.

                      Take care, all.
                      BelleGirl

                      Alcohol does me no favors.

                      Pouring poison down your throat is just plain STUPID!

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                        Re: Newbies Nest

                        Good to see you, Belle. I hope you are proud of yourself for staying AF during this national, global, and personal very trying time. All the best to your son, NS

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                          Re: Newbies Nest

                          Good Monday evening Nesters,

                          Had a nice cool day with sun, glad summer is coming to an end, always was a fall girl

                          Belle, glad you stopped in. I hope everything goes well for your son, hang in there!

                          Hello to NS, G, & anyone checking in later.
                          This is indeed a tough time for all of us but we will remain strong & stay on plan. I am 99% sure I don’t have another quit in me so I’m keeping this one forever!!

                          Wishing everyone a safe night in the nest!

                          Lav
                          AF since 03/26/09
                          NF since 05/19/09
                          Success comes one day at a time :thumbs:

                          Comment


                            Re: Newbies Nest

                            Hey Nesters!
                            Hubs took me and the dog out for a car ride today. We were Extra good, so he got us a Chick-Fil-A sandwich!
                            Finally some sun and cooler temps.

                            Nar, in retrospect, that’s exactly what RBG’s family should have done. It didn’t take the vultures long (less than an hour) to pounce.
                            Our political system is so broken.
                            I made a protest necklace today.
                            59F2D579-D3C5-42FA-A726-16EF82B66AA1.jpg
                            Hope everyone has an easy evening. Hugs, Byrdie
                            All you gotta do, is get thru this day. AF 1/20/2011
                            Tool Box
                            Newbie's Nest

                            Comment


                              Re: Newbies Nest

                              Morning nesters, just checking in to let Pav know I'm still alive and here haha, no I just haven't posted in the nest in a bit, been reading of course but have stuff to comment on but not much time to do it, Byrdie that's a lovely necklace, Belle, I'm so sorry you're going through this with your son, our kids mean more to us than anything when they're going through something I think it hurts worse than if it was happening to us I was having a telemed appointment and the doctor asked me about drinking and I just told her "surprisingly no" while the world seems to be drinking more us on mwo are not touching a drop thru all the B.S I think I've actually surprised myself by not wanting to drink, Wags, hope your air is clearer, what a strange time and the weather seems to be reflecting it, being so dry that fires are outta control, I don't know what is causing the smoke to linger here, I think it's the one burning by San Bernardino,hope you're feeling better, I never followed much politics before so I barely know who RGB was it what she's done but now I hear only good things about her, still doing grocery delivery, still work at the as but salon, got into a small argument yesterday with a guy who said I cut his hair to short, it was long and scraggly and I scissor cut it to make it presentable, he wasn't super pissed but when I told him free of charge since you're not pleased and just please leave is when things got heated, he called me an effin b! tch and insisted on paying, ok whatever, just go!!!! People just aren't themselves at all, so much anger and I know cuz I feel it too much love to the gang and wishes for a wonderful AF day, P. S Pav I laughed about the big guy with the tiny mask I see that all the time and it looks silly, also the guys with big ole beards and all the hair is sprouting out the mask hahahaha, but at least they're wearing it
                              I have too much shit to do today and tomorrow to drink:sohappy:

                              I'm taking care of the "tomorrow me":thumbsup:
                              Drinkin won't help a damn thing! Will only make me sick for DAYS and that ugly, spacey dumb feeling-no thanks!

                              Comment


                                Re: Newbies Nest

                                Hi, All:

                                Thanks for checking in, Pauly. I like your take on that a$$ customer - people just aren't themselves. So many people are on edge, stressed about rent, food, health, politics, etc. It is such a good antidote to just try to stay calm and relaxed. Ask what happened instead of what is the matter with you. Breathe in, breathe out. Sometimes that calm actually elevates people more! I am SO SO SO happy I am not drinking through all of this. Everyone I talk to is drinking more. CRAZY.

                                Belle - what a time for your family! I am glad you're all on the same page and supporting each other. Good luck with everything, and thank goodness you're sober through it. Could you imagine trying to make decisions like that with a hangover?? Keep it up.

                                We lost Dee Doo? Frances, you around? Tony? Hope you all three are hanging in there.

                                Happy Sober Tuesday,
                                Pav

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