The shakes

[pinkpeppercorns]

The shakes

betty boop;249893 wrote: Pink I am at a loss as to what to say here ......I am the opposite end of the scale to you, I am a born worrier, I get close to people then hurt like hell if I lose them. It has happened several times here, people ask for support, I give that support, I worry, they disappear, I hurt like hell and worry more. I stopped coming here for that reason a while ago but now I am back.

I am just explaining that so that you can understand why people worry so much.

Take care hon, we are here if you need us .........

BB xx

Hi BB,

Thanks for the post. It helps me understand.

I am actually a serious worrier myself, but I tend to worry only about my own predicaments, my daughter's and my grandsons'. Well, all of us and the overall state of the world. I'm not sure why I think no one would bother to worry about me. A pretty shot self-esteem, I guess. I will try to be a bit more responsible about letting everyone know at least whether I am alive or dead. Well, I guess I can't inform anyone if I'm dead, but I'll try to keep everyone informed if I'm alive.

[Long Road]

The shakes

We'll make sure your all right Pink as far as we can. I can't imagine having children, let alone grandkids!

[Not Happy Hour-Happy Life]

The shakes

chrysa;248959 wrote:
oh just realized you posted this a month ago PinkP...how are you now?

Hi Peppercorns (to me, that sounds much stronger and spicier than Pink!)

I think Chrysa was trying to tough love you, but it backfired. On the positive side, she did find a month old cry-for-help and reached out to you..... and the MWO family is rallying around you!

I can only recommend drinking water. Pure, clean, wonderfully refreshing water. Even if it's in between drinks, reach for the water too, okay? Pepper, you are VERY functional- if I was drinking and trying to post here, I'd be mishspelling and over the bored all ritey then (haha) Just a thought- have you done any research on current clinical trials that you could participate in? Here is the link:

Search of: alcohol | Open Studies | United States, Massachusetts - List Results - ClinicalTrials.gov
There are 27 alcohol related studies that are actively recruiting people in Massachussetts. There is even a study about the use of Topirimate. Perhaps there is one that can help you conquer this beast once and for all. :l
I wish you well, Peppercorns!

[pinkpeppercorns]

The shakes

My neighbor--who has been against the idea and refusing to drive me there--agreed to take me to detox tonight. I have little doubt this will change in no time.

I just called detox. I made the mistake of telling the admissions man I have a fractured rib and possibly a fractured elbow. So they won't let me in until they get an okay from a doc. Damn it. Why did I have to tell him that?! So now I need to either go to the ER (only for the elbow, really, as I already went to the ER for the rib) or wait until Monday and make a doc appointment. Damn it, again.

My neighbor went ahead and took his sleeping pills (in excess, as usual) so he's passed out and now no help at all.

GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR.

[dexterhead]

The shakes

Peppers: crap! call back and say you've had the elbow checked. Lie, do whatever it takes. Or, do you think you are sober enough to drive yourself there?

[pinkpeppercorns]

The shakes

dexterhead;250069 wrote: Peppers: crap! call back and say you've had the elbow checked. Lie, do whatever it takes. Or, do you think you are sober enough to drive yourself there?

He said they'd need to have something faxed to them saying my elbow was okay. Another GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR.

[Dolly Sunshine]

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Pink we are all pulling for you. Did you give them your name? Maybe you could just call back and act like you didn't call before.

[Long Road]

The shakes

Dolly

Good thinking 99.

[Dolly Sunshine]

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Well being a sneaky drunk helped develop such skills

[Long Road]

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Dolly

Well I was going to suggest insurance fraud: but then I used to live mid-Town.

[Long Road]

The shakes

Pink,

Haven't heard from you for 40 mins. How goes it.

[pinkpeppercorns]

The shakes

Dolly Sunshine;250088 wrote: Pink we are all pulling for you. Did you give them your name? Maybe you could just call back and act like you didn't call before.

I did give him my name and, unfortunately, they have a record of every call you make. In fact, every call you make is registered as an "incident" and recorded in your files. Then when you check in, they put this wrist band on you saying how many "incidents" you've had--which means they tally not just how many times you've been admitted but how many times you've called. It gets a bit embarrassing. People will ask, "What's your incident rating?" Mine is growing by leaps and bounds. Ugh. He asked why I didn't actually follow through on coming in after my last three phone calls. Double ugh.

My neighbor brought over two half pints. I tried to sip slowly through the first. I can't find the second. I'm wondering if I already drank it. Oh, the fun of being a drunk.

[Dolly Sunshine]

The shakes

Please keep us updated. I wish i had more advice.

[Guest]

The shakes

Pink,

The first time I detoxed at home my husband doled out so much a day to me, he didn't want to play this time so I detoxed myself. I would get on my bicyle everyday and buy just one half a pint of whiskey as my daily ration to taper down on. Had I bought two half pints a day I would have drunk them both, I know this because I tried that one day and guess what- yes I drank them both. It can be hard to detox yourself when drinking too much I know. Then I just started buying a 28 once bottle of beer to drink, then abs for 39 days. You might want to try just skipping trying to taper down with the whiskey and go straight to trying to taper down with beer, that might be easier. If you can't detox yourself, you will have to go to a detox center so that they can detox you- I mean if you want to live that is.

Now when I drink I keep it below the level to which quitting would cause me to have to go through withdrawal again. Why drink at all?- well, because drinking occasionally atleast keeps me from obsessing over NOT drinking. I know that is a little nuts, but the best plan I can come up with for now. I just can't see myself giving it up forever.

[pinkpeppercorns]

The shakes

Not Happy Hour-Happy Life;249934 wrote: Hi Peppercorns (to me, that sounds much stronger and spicier than Pink!)

I think Chrysa was trying to tough love you, but it backfired. On the positive side, she did find a month old cry-for-help and reached out to you..... and the MWO family is rallying around you!

Thanks for your note.

I was tough-loved the first 19 or 20 years of my life. I believe that's largely (if not solely) why my self-esteem is so low. I'm sorry, but I don't believe a verbal beating is what I need right now. Thankfully, most everyone here is handing out compassion and understanding and encouragement, which seems to make me want to at least try to reach for the stars as opposed to making me want to reach for the nearest gun to do myself in. Tough love might work for some (though I can't imagine whom), but it doesn't work for me. It only makes me feel worse about myself and my predicament.