Mod Squad Weekly Thread 27/10/08

[vlad]

Mod Squad Weekly Thread 27/10/08

Oh, err, afterwards we had an hour to wait for our train so we did actually go to a pub after and I had a pint of lager. Er-hem - still feel fine though.

[Sunbeam]

Mod Squad Weekly Thread 27/10/08

Hey, group:

I had such a lovely evening with my husband. We shared a bottle of wine with the meal. The great news was, there were a couple of inches of wine left in my glass, but I felt like I already had as much as I wanted. I offered it to my husband, and he dumped it down the drain! I never thought I could achieve that level of indifference to wine or any form of alcohol.

I have made three changes in September and October that have increased my success: limiting my alcohol to one day per week, not drinking alone, and not planning to drink. My AF weekend (in addition to all weekdays) convinced me that I can have future AF weekends probably without being blindsided by cravings. That second point was probably the hardest change, since so much of my previous drinking had been alone. Planning to drink on the weekend seems to make me drink more. So now I approach each weekend thinking I may or may not drink. This is all recent progress, obviously has not withstood the test of time. But I'm feeling GOOD! That gives me the energy to continue to do well, and I hope I can share that with all of you.

Lila and Vera, glad you are also doing well.

Deebs, I think you're OK too, but the stuff of life just goes on, doesn't it? I try to remind myself that we appreciate the good days more because of the down days.

I probably will work in a nice bike ride today. I also swim for at least 30 min on Monday/Friday, take walks around the 1/2 mile block weather permitting, do strengthening exercises Tues./ Thurs. am on my living room floor. I eat well, including today a nice apple/walnut salad with vanilla yogurt dressing for breakfast. I just wish I could drop a few pounds.

Be well, all.

[Lila]

Mod Squad Weekly Thread 27/10/08

hi everyone
good morning!
Sunbeam, don't you lose weight if you stop drinking? That's what I am banking on! You sound like you are doing great; I love reading about it. Exactly where I want to be.
Hi DeeBee! When will you be totally done with all that lawyer stuff? Won't that be a relief? Vera, Starts, Vlad, St John, BH, Peri...(how is hubby acting today?) and everyone, hope you have a wonderfu day!
Lila

[BecomingMeAtLast]

Mod Squad Weekly Thread 27/10/08

Hi,

My first post on this weekly thread. What a great idea! I've been modding for a while, with AF days inbetween. Just wanted to pop in and say hi. I'll be posting here as I think it will help and you all sound like fun.

Becoming

[Eve11]

Mod Squad Weekly Thread 27/10/08

Hey Sunbeam,
Needed to hear your words of encouragement as I'm back to struggling.
The night started out fine, chili and red wine at the neighbors. In the past I have refilled my glass without thinking about how much I'm drinking so it felt great to be very controlled, have a glass, go trick or treating with their kids, return and have a 2nd glass. Then we went to our home to hand out candy and guess what?
Remember that bottle of wine from the other night when I was so stressed that I bought a bottle and had 2 glasses? Well, it was sitting in that fridge and I knew it...and the beast just got the better of me I'm afraid. Decided to have a third and it was so tasty and so much time had passed from the previous two glasses that I went over my limit and had a fourth.
So...I'm not pleased with myself. This is the thing that I fear. Can I really mod because it's scary when the beast takes over and you can't and don't stop once you start. Usually the drinktracker gives me the incentive to say no and it didn't work last night.
Thanks for letting me vent.
Will be back.
Eve11

[Sunbeam]

Mod Squad Weekly Thread 27/10/08

Hi Eve,
I'm thinking you just have too much alcohol in your system. Every time you add alcohol within a week of another glass, you are increasing the level of alcohol in your system. It takes at least a week for any amount of alcohol to get out of your system. If you go AF for a week, you will gain strength against the Beast. I really can't say whether you can mod or not, but you could take off that AF week and see how you feel. I too really hate that powerless feeling of the Beast being in control. Knowing I can go AF at any time gives me great power. We all need to keep asking, is alcohol really that great? It certainly isn't worth giving up your life to the Beast.

Stay close, I am sure others will be checking in with their thoughts and ideas. I feel I only can and wish to offer what has worked for me.

[BecomingMeAtLast]

Mod Squad Weekly Thread 27/10/08

I went over my modding goal last night, too. Not too much and I feel okay today but I did do that. Where is the drinktracker? For some reason or other I can't seem to find it...

Thanks for any help,
Be

[periwinkle]

Mod Squad Weekly Thread 27/10/08

Hi squad,

I'm back. I got some great feedback on the general discussion. I really needed some immediate attention and got it! Thanks for the squad folks who followed me there! It's a big forum. I can't possibly keep up with everything going on here!

Welcome Becoming Me! I'm glad you're here. The drink tracker is under miscellaneous. I've never used it so that's all I can tell you.

Eve, I am sorry you're struggling. Can you go back to the beginning and look at all the steps again. I think Sun is right in doing an AF time. Have you done that? Something stuck in my head on one of your posts earlier in the week and I didn't bring it up then. I should have, but for some reason didn't. I didn't look up you exact wording so forgive me if I got something wrong here. But you said that you had broken one of your mod rules regarding drinking during the week. You had a couple galsses of wine the "sneaky way" before your husband got home so you wouldn't have to talk to him about it. This is hard in writing because you are not seeing my face and hearing my voice. So know that I mean this in a very loving way: Eve, that does not sound like control or successful moderation. I believe you have some red flags to look at. I know that I am new at this. But I care about you. Please go back and look at your patterns of this past week. Write it all down (doesn't have to be on this site, I find pen and paper is a really good outlet). You can PM or e-mail me or any one of us if you want. You can be angry with me if you like, I can take it. But I feel I must be honest with you and hope you would do the same for me. Hang in there. I believe in you. You can and will do this! Let us know your thoughts and progress.

I don't mean to sound like the downer lady here. We do a lot of socializing here on this thread but the real reason we are here is to fight this battle together. I hope that if any of you ever see my red flags that you will point them out to me.

Hope everyone has a good weekend.

periwinkle

[periwinkle]

Mod Squad Weekly Thread 27/10/08

DeeBee, I would have been bummed too if I had to cancel my romantic plans with hubby! :dancin: He's been away for a while now.


Can you send her off to a movie or something?!

periwinkle

[Sunbeam]

Mod Squad Weekly Thread 27/10/08

Hi all,
Peri, I just got around to reading your post in General Discussion. When I went AF last January, my husband's first question was, "Do I need to quit too?" So maybe that is why your husband seems unsupportive, because he is thinking that.

Lila, many people do lost weight when they quit drinking. But some of us crave carbs to replace alcohol. I munched a lot of chocolate PB granola during my AF time, which was pretty healthy but still too many calories. I feel I've now gotten those carbs under control, and have a high level of physical activity, but still no weight loss. Grrrr!

Becoming, DrinkTracker is a great tool to use for moderators - I wish I had used it in April when I first started to moderate. Al quickly makes your memory foggy. You may be going over your limits but not seeing the pattern so you can adjust. Just the fact that you need to post your number of drinks helps you drink less. If you decide to use it, be honest with yourself, and only record honest drinks: 1 serving of wine = 5 oz., 1 bottle = 5 servings.

Eve, I hope you're OK.

take care, all

[Eve11]

Mod Squad Weekly Thread 27/10/08

periwinkle;457716 wrote:
Eve, that does not sound like control or successful moderation. I believe you have some red flags to look at.

Peri,
No offense taken. Very astute observation. I will heed that advice. That's why we call come here...to lean on each other for support and to learn from each other.
I will definitely be paying better attention to what I am doing. I agree, truly succcessful modertion isn't sneaking drinks or breaking one's promises to themselves so I'm not there yet. Hoping to be, hoping it can work. I'll keep working on it and we'll see how it goes. I'm a work in progress that's for sure!
Eve

[periwinkle]

Mod Squad Weekly Thread 27/10/08

Hi Sunbeam,
I actually asked hubby if he would do the 30 day AF with me. His response was "during football season?". Then he smiled and said "of course I will". I got started on the kudzu and l-glut for the first 2 weeks and did fairly well moderating the first 2 weeks before my 30 day AF. I have since added topa, hypno cds, other supps. I then told him I was ok and he didn't need to do the 30 days with me. He has been great about asking if I'm in a good place before having a drink. Just on this one day when I was struggling the most. My head went a bit goofy with it. And it wasn't even that I was craving AL. It was that he didn't consider me. Oh brother emotions!

We talked about it today. He said that since we had gone to a "bar" to eat, in his mind he assumed that I was ok with him having a beer. In my mind any place we go to eat has plenty of AL. I don't distinguish a "bar" from a "restaurant" in the same way he apparently does. The place we went to has great food. For me, whether a bar, a restaurant, or eating at home, I just wanted him to consider me and ask me if I was stable enough for him to drink beforehand, knowing that I just had a day where I had thought about drinking.

I'm doing much better today.

Thank you so much for your concerns,
periwinkle

[periwinkle]

Mod Squad Weekly Thread 27/10/08

Eve, I'm so glad to hear from you. I submitted that post then worried about it all day. I want you to be successful. And I believe you can be. :h You have been in my prayers all day.

periwinkle :l

[Lila]

Mod Squad Weekly Thread 27/10/08

hi everyone
Sunbeam, are you taking the lglut? It is supposed to help with sugar cravings, so I have read...
Anyways, I took the kudzu and l glut, here I am!
Lila

[DeeBee]

Mod Squad Weekly Thread 27/10/08

Happy Sunday Squad!

Lordy we had one hell of a storm at midnight last night, the daughter ended up in bed with us (she's a bit old for this now) and it sounded like the lightening hit the house. My router got fried but luckily i had an old one in the cupboard otherwise there would be no MWO today.

Today the sun is shinning so I'm going to spend some time gardening and then I must prepare for my trip next week. I leave on Tuesday and get back on Thursday and I am not looking forward to it. This is the reason I left my last job but something has been offered to me that I felt I must try. I do have an option of opting out if I don't enjoy it so that's my saving grace.

Sun, you really are styling. I love reading your posts, they inspire me and motivate my thought patterns. "Is AL really that great?" Bang on what I was thinking this morning.
Hubby and I played Backgammon yesterday pm and we were having a blast thrashing each other - both of us are very competitive when it comes to games... anyway he was drinking the whole time and I was having my coffee. Half way through i figured a glass of wine would be nice. When we finished playing I still had half a glass left, so sipped away at it but it just tasted VILE.... can't figure out WHY did I have it in the first place??? So i put some thought into it and its the fun factor I wanted to hold onto. Normally I only had "fun" if I drank so when we finished playing I felt let down that the fun was over.
It's the thought process of the journey that I find is where my growth is happening now, before I would never THINK about why I was drinking.

Eve, i found in the early days it was very easy for me to "forget" my rules of modding. Only after I did 60 days AF did I feel strong and motivated enough to meet my goals. Something clicked for me and I can't really explain it but now I fell confident that I am on the right path.
My only advice is to think last night through, think about how you were feeling.... did H.A.L.T come into it? And then learn from the lesson and move on. Hope you are doing okay today?

Vladster, your chineese dinner sounds very romantic. I know you are bummed about that extra drink whilst waiting for the train but at least it wasn't vodka. You have stuck to your guns with not having vodka and for that I so admire you:-) I remember when hubby and I went to london, the first place my brother took us to was a bar at Kings Cross train station - hell they are everwhere!

Welcome Be! Did you find the Drink Tracker - it really is a useful tool. What are your modding goals/rules, if you feel like sharing?

Lila, as far as the weight loss goes.... I found I dropped quite a bit when I first started on Topa but I have picked it up again. I think the reason is because I am now eating 3 meals a day which I have never done in my adult life and I still need to get myself organised with an exercise routine. I have come to the conclusion that I'd rather have the extra kilos, then the AL so for now I am comfortable with myself but I do want to firm up.

Peri, I am pleased that you and hubby got to chat about your feelings and what you are going through. I know that communicating is so important especially if our partners don't have a problem with AL and therefore don't understand what we are going thu. I tend to bottle up my emotions with hubby and it's is not healthy for me nor him so it's something I need to work on.

Hi to St John, BH, Vera and anyone I've forgotten.