Ruby Tuesday weekly meeting

[Sunbeam]

Ruby Tuesday weekly meeting

Hi all,
I'm not happy to post, but I am posting that I did not meet my goal of an AF weekend. That little voice gets talking in my head, and it's not too much to have 3 glasses of wine on a Saturday, though two would be better. Oh well, gott go get stuff done.

[bear73]

Ruby Tuesday weekly meeting

well I had a glass of wine last night - will next drink (3 max) on sat eve after a sporting event I'm taking part in. Moderation is such a personal goal isn't it?

If I can stick to no more than 3 in a night I'm happy and max of 500 calories on booze a week I'm happy.

[Ask For Help]

Ruby Tuesday weekly meeting

Checking In

What a wonderful conversation going on here.. . about how we feel when we're doing better, but not meeting all our goals.

I had one of those weeks last week:
For this week my moderating goals were for 4 AF days again but I'm not off to a good start: I planned AF days Sun or Monday and had 2 drinks each day (Blah). SO now I plan to be AF on Tues Wed Thurs ( no social activities planned) and to only drink on Fri or Sat if I'm out with friends, otherwise AF.

So I was AF on Tues Wed, had 2 drinks on Thurs and then blew it on Friday with 5 drinks at home. Was AF Saturday. So 3 AF days and 4 drinking days with one being "over the limit"
Exercise: realistically: Yoga on Tues, Golf on Wed and a walk or yoga Friday after work and then biking on Saturday. I'm working 9 - 10 hour days and getting exercise in is very tough.
Met/exceeded exercise goal as I both walked AND went to yoga on Friday . .. but didn't bike in the pouring rain on Sunday. I have gotten my Wii returned so can start dancing to the videos again.
Will use Drink Tracker and report in next weekend.
Done


So the fallout of doing OK (except for Friday) has been more resistance on my part . . . I find this is often the case for me. I resent and rebel against "the rules". I was going to come on here Sunday and post that getting "behind in the count" by drinking on Sun/Mon last week would best be handled by ensuring I was AF those days so I had something to look forward to, rather than feeling deprived the rest of the week.

So what have I done? This week I took myself out for Mother's Day dinner Sun and was very proud of my 1.5 drinks. I had 2 drinks each night Mon and Tues - again not overdoing it, but using up my whole quota of moderating days in first 1/2 of the week, and feeling like a shlump and a failure even though I drank less in 3 days than my "overdoing it" day.

I am having a hard time realistically commiting to be AF for the remaining 4 days until the new week starts on Sunday. So I can commit to AF Wed/Thur and either Fri or Sat AND also commit to no more than 3. That way I meet my drinks/week goal, but not my 3 nights /week goal.

Maybe if I'd come on Sunday and written the commitment I would have done better. I will try that next week, looking ahead and planning better. Also I have to remember that a) I have had weeks in which I have NOT maintained 3 AF days in the past so even 3 is good AND b) I felt most successful when every week in and out I had 4 AF days and kept the total drink count under 10 so it is still the goal to strive for.

I will keep on trying to keep on.
Ask

[Eve11]

Ruby Tuesday weekly meeting

Hey Modsters,

Another successful week of only 6 1/2 drinks.

My goals were: No more than 8 drinks per week (I'll find a balance between MM and NIAAA)
Mon 2
Fri 1.5
Sat 3

No more than 3 drinks in a night.

On Sat. I really could have been all done with 2 but we were out with new friends and they wanted a nightcap after our dinner out. So we returned to our house and had a glass of wine (my third). There was about an hour between dinner and the nightcap so 3 was workable without the effects of being too tipsy.

Sunday was a graduation party and wine was being served but I just didn't want to do it. I work Mondays and wanted to study a little after the party and alcohol is such a demotivator. So...am glad I didn't.

I think I have found workable goals for me that I'm going to try to stick with. So for the week of May 17-24th:

No more than 8 drinks per week
No more than 3 drinks in a night

What are your plans and goals for success? If you were successful what helped? If you weren't what were your triggers that interfered with meeting your goals this week?

:l
Eve11

[canadiangirl]

Ruby Tuesday weekly meeting

Last week went *okay*
AF Tuesday, Thursday and Sunday
Check
plus another random day if it makes sense to do so
I guess it didn't make sense...? Fuzzy goal setting is my downfall!
3-4 drinks (or less) on any of the other days
Well, 3-4 drinks, anyway. It really isn't usually less. Again with the fuzzy goal setting.

That being said, and although I think 4 days AF per week is optimum, I'm still happy for now with a predictable 3 days. Especially in light of the fact that it wasn't all that easy this week. I had serious anxiety about AF on Thursday and Sunday. In fact, the anxiety about Thursday started Wednesday evening and was really uncomfortable. I decided that I wasn't going to make the evenings all *special* and activity-filled, but just be normal about being AF, so maybe that was the problem. Anyway, once the evenings started, the anxiety disappeared and I'm really happy to say that I just puttered around as if AF was a given. {{{Stupid anxiety}}} :H

So I'm holding the course for this week with the same goals.

[frances]

Ruby Tuesday weekly meeting

Good morning everyone!

My goal was to only drink on special occasions and to never drink more than 3.

Results: Tuesday I finished a bottle of wine which meant I had 2 glasses. No occasion, so I didn't meet my goal there. I have a big problem with open bottles and got some good suggestions on how I might deal with that in the future - thanks everyone!!

Saturday had 2 drinks at a ball game. Sunday had 3 drinks out with friends I hadn't seen in 8 months. Met my goals with those two.

This week I have the same goal as last week with the additional goal that I want to actually meet my goal this week unlike the past two weeks :H

Good luck to all

[letgolaughing]

Ruby Tuesday weekly meeting

just looked at my drink tracker and it seems i've been allowing myself 2 drinks on the weekdays that i do drink. When i get back from vacation, i am going to try to limit myself to no more than 1.5 on those days, and even try to shoot back for 1 only. no 2's

[Rita Mary]

Ruby Tuesday weekly meeting

I am very new to this and pray that I can just drink normally once I get my starter kit. Any suggestions??? advise? I am scared to death that I won't be able to be a controlled drinker - I don't want to have to give it up all together.

[Sunbeam]

Ruby Tuesday weekly meeting

Rita Mary,
Welcome! My suggestion is that you jump on a thread in the Just Starting Out section. People there will help you with your questions. Most of us go at least 30 days without alcohol before trying to drink moderately. Most on this site say they can't moderate, it is more difficult that just not drinking.

[bear73]

Ruby Tuesday weekly meeting

hello there

Well I have had a bottle of wine last night with friends and a glass of wine Thursday eve - thats it all week tho. So I am under my weekly units - but I have binged.
Still I am smoking and drinking too much when I do drink - but am keeping on keeping on.

Next week I will hit the gym -work been so stressful - lack of support from managers,immense workload,workaholic job share partner. I have depression and low self esteem so I have internalised all of this.
I had a good chat with a really good friend last night so I am feeling more in control now.

Lovely sunny Summer day today, I'm off to London to watch roller derby with team later on, evening at a friend's house and relatively eary booze free evening ahead.
I may bounce up and down in the garden on my mini trampette to get some exercise, before bathing,shaving and fake tanning my legs.

[Eve11]

Ruby Tuesday weekly meeting

Good morning modsters and lurkers.

Well, another successful mod week for me.

My goals were:
No more than 8 drinks per week
No more than 3 drinks in a night

My results were 7.5 drinks for the week with no more than 2 drinks in a night.

The interesting thing this week was attending a luncheon on Saturday with a group of women with like interests but who were all strangers to me. The waitress took the order for the first 4 arrivals and it didn't even occur to me to think of having a drink whereas in the past I would have been using the excuse of a luncheon as a reason to celebrate with having a drink! I was the 3rd person to order and my struggle was whether I should have the ice tea like person #1 or lemonade like person #2. No craving or angst about wanting a drink when no-one else ordered or wanted one! Then person 5 showed up and she was verbalizing how she was dying for a marguerita. Person #1 perked up and you could SEE the desire in her face...she may have well said "If she's having a drink then I want one too!" It was so nice to observe all of that and not have it be me being the one with the desire or craving.

I am so grateful I had another successful week and was able to enjoy my 1 or 2 glasses the nights I decided to drink and didn't go over my limit and stayed within my real desired limit of 2 (although I've given myself permission for 3 in an evening). I'm just so much happier when I can stick to two as I have minimal effects the next day.

The honesty I want to have coming here helps me to keep within my limits. In the past there have been times of wanting that 3rd drink and that small voice says "But then you'd have to post 3" or "that 3rd drink would be you over your goal for the week."

The accountability with goal setting and reporting is really truly helping me. I hope it's helping you. My goals for the week of May 23-29 remain the same:

No more than 8 drinks per week
No more than 3 drinks in a night

What are your goals for success?

:l
Eve11

[cash]

Ruby Tuesday weekly meeting

Hello Eve11. Thanks for the PM to come over. Your lurking comment is spot on. So I wasn't sure if I should come on here as I hadn't planned to to 30 days AF first. I have recently tried campral for a month or so and didnt realy notice any noticable dirfference. Prior to that I got topamax but definitely didn't like that. I have come to the conclusion that I have got the willpower to moderate - just I mostly choose not to use it. I am going to give TSM a go but my goal is not to drink midweek. I have done this in the past an feel great when I do - but then just want to have a few and away we go down the slippery slope. I have twin 2.5 yer olds that I need to have all my energy for and drinking to excess makes me tired, grumpy, irritable and less patient with them.

[frances]

Ruby Tuesday weekly meeting

Hi all and good morning!

This week my goal was to only drink on special occasions and never more than 3. And I added the additional goal that I wanted meet my goal this week, which is probably redundant and silly but I had gone two weeks without success and was frustrated!

This week I didn't have any drinks. I couldn't believe it when the weekend was over and I had not had a drink! Usually I'll consider a 'nice' dinner, even at home, as a special occasion and have a glass or two of wine but this week I didn't think I should (we didn't really have anything 'nice' for dinner - just the usual rushed stuff because we had things going on all weekend with the kids). And fortunately or unfortunately, I didn't have any social events this weekend.

So I met my goals this week I am happy to report!

Next weekend will be different - a holiday weekend and my mother's birthday - so there is sure to be a family gathering. I'll try to keep to my rules - maybe I'll do better if we go out instead of having something at someone's house - hmmm I'll have to think about what to do but I really need to plan ahead so I don't slip this time.

Hope everyone has a great week and keep up the good work everyone!

[Sunbeam]

Ruby Tuesday weekly meeting

Frances,
Good for you! I used to have a signature line, "every weekend is not an occasion". You have lived up to the true spirit of occasional drinking. I was successful with that for awhile, but not recently.

Cash, welcome! Yowsers, twin 2-year-olds. Enough to make anyone want a drink, but they do need you without the cloudy thinking and actions that drinking brings.

Eve, congrats on your success!

I think this is a great thread, specific to moderate goals drinking. I don't post my goal weekly because it is pretty much same old, same old: I don't drink during the week, I will have usually 3 glasses Saturday (or Friday) evening. This pattern is not difficult for me, but I do wish at some level I could have some AF weekends. That little voice just gets chattering in my head that this pattern does not constitute drinking too much, I should just relax and enjoy the wine, and I do.

Bear, it sounds like you are being successful, in spite of glitches that most of us encounter.

Take care, all.

[canadiangirl]

Ruby Tuesday weekly meeting

Hi Everyone!

Wow, Frances - when I can 'forget' to drink for a week, I will feel that I have mastered moderating. Good for you! In fact, we all seem to be doing well.

I met my goals for the week, also. I'm heading into 10 days of rotating house guests of various duration, so I'm keeping to the same goals for the next two weeks. I don't expect any problems, and will likely be able to cut down because I really don't drink much "socially". I hope that doesn't mean my drinking is the "anti-social" kind...

After the dust settles, I will be cutting back to 4 AF days a week - it seems like the best way to cut down the weekly amount.

Bear - good for you, too. And thanks for reminding me to fake tan my legs, otherwise no capris for these chicken legs.

Cash - welcome. I didn't go 30 days AF before I started here, either. Which is not to say I don't see the value of it, and will likely be doing it at some point this summer. Maybe we can do it together.

Eve - the accountability of this thread is invaluable to me. Thanks again for starting it. :l