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    October Mod Squad

    Hello, Modders!

    I was having a private discussion and thought I'd bring it here, as I want to share with you all where I am right now.

    I am approaching 100 days AF. (Well, I had 1/2 a beer a couple of Sundays ago, probably b/c I was pissed off that a certain faction of the stalking AFers were getting on my case for touting the mods boards when I had never tried to moderate!) I don't know when I'm going to drink, but I do know that I'm going to not do it by giving in to an urge, and I know I'm going to be in a situation tonight where I used to drink. Heavily.

    I'm getting together with some college buddies that I haven't seen in quite a while and seeing some New Orleans music (musicians I know from a band called The Radiators, which called it quits last year after a 33 1/3 year run!) in NYC. These guys, and I was possibly the worst, can really drink when we went to see this band. Most of the group knows I'm on the wagon, and nobody will put peer pressure, but its funny, the plans came up quickly, and I felt my mindset slipping back into the mode of "Do I want to drive or take the train and have a few beers on the way into the city on the train and not worry about driving on the way out."

    That lasted about 2 minutes. I noted the thought pattern, thought it was interesting, and decided I would not only drive, but also do some of the hypnotherapy before I go! I'm not drinking tonight. Period. I'll be able to drive home from the show, leave when I want to, and feel good about not drinking to boot! Funny thing is, I'll probably save $50 or more as it's easy to spend a lot of money drinking in NYC!

    Better part is that I can make a couple of business calls and stop into a few offices on the way, and have most of the trip (parking, dinner, etc.) expensed!

    But the realization that my brain went to that thought pattern so easily is a little scarey. My guess is when I do attempt to moderate, it's going to be drinking some wine for an occaission. Right now I'm thinking Thanksgiving! We'll see...

    Have a great day, all. I'll let you know how it goes, but you probably won't hear from me until tomorrow.
    Well the 1st are the hardest days don't you worry anymore.
    When life looks like easy street there is danger at your door.

    Comment


      October Mod Squad

      Hi D, fantastic work on your 100 days! That is a HUGE accomplishment. It's really sad to hear that a certain non supportive faction at the boards led you to drink though, although it was such a small amount, but shame on them. You are an incredibly strong person and your approach has really inspired me to look into other ways and means of dealing with life in a more productive way. Now I just need to get off my lazy butt and do some things about it, and start doing some meditation or hypno cds for example. You also inspired me when I was doing my af stint a little while back, to be strong and get through it. Keep it up D!

      Comment


        October Mod Squad

        Good job, D!! I agree that it's a shame you were driven to drink by a few ignorant people. It should be your decision if and when you decide to moderate.

        I understand we're (Mod Squad) being accused of stirring up trouble on the boards. Correct me if I'm wrong: Didn't people come INTO our threads and start "trouble" or am I forgetting something?


        "I like people too much or not at all."
        Sylvia Plath

        Comment


          October Mod Squad

          Yes, LG, we're being accused of all sorts of things we (and I in particular) never did. I did warn newbies that were talking about moderation or going AF and then moderating not to post those thoughts in the NN, but I never EVER told anyone not to go there. I also never touted moderation as the way to go, as some will repeatedly post.

          Instead of reacting, I'm choosing to see the humor in it. Especially when they get so angry and irritated that they need to cross "boundries" and launch attacks. The slapstick childish humor in such activities now strikes me as funny. :H:H Rather than take offense, I laugh, which feels a whole lot better than getting sucked into an argument (with peeps that don't even read the threads they're commenting on closely enough to be accurate no less!)

          Oh yeah, I forgot: The recipe for my favorite drink is 1/2 Lemonade, 1/2 Iced Tea. I prefer the big cans, 99cents, and Arnold Palmer history on them! The O'Doul's Amber is ok if it's really cold, but I really prefer AP better.

          V--hows the search for the next v-dog coming?
          Well the 1st are the hardest days don't you worry anymore.
          When life looks like easy street there is danger at your door.

          Comment


            October Mod Squad

            DfromCT;1390930 wrote:
            Oh yeah, I forgot: The recipe for my favorite drink is 1/2 Lemonade, 1/2 Iced Tea. I prefer the big cans, 99cents, and Arnold Palmer history on them!
            The recipe for my favorite drink is 3/4 seltzer (prefer pellegrino or perrier) 1/4 lite cranberry and a lime slice. Tasty!
            :l
            Eve11
            "Control your destiny or somebody else will"

            ~Jack Welsh~:h

            God grant me the serenity to accept the people I cannot change, the courage to change the one I can, and the wisdom to know it's me. ~Author unknown, :thumbs:

            Comment


              October Mod Squad

              Good evening here from Ca, thank you for the welcomes. My story will come out little by little - I am not much of a sharer, but have found that being anonymous has let me share more that is normal.
              I did feel some release yesterday after chosing to moderate - and funnily enough I opened some wine, did not truly enjoy it, did not finish the bottle (which is unheard of) and woke in the morning happily to pour the remainder down the sink - it seems that maybe the weight of being AF was lifted and reality kicked in, and it became a lot easier??
              I scored 13 on the test, and tried to stay true to the 12 month rule, it was different if I looked at the last 4 months or so when I decided to become a little more engaged...
              Happy to be here, this could be the turning point.
              looking forward to maybe adopting Ladybirds advice of gently, gently until it is no longer a problem, and hope to be able to live out Farrfalla's wish to drink champagne at my daughters wedding (I have two, so at least twice more :H).
              again, thank you :thanks:
              “The only courage you will ever need is the courage to live the life you want"

              Comment


                October Mod Squad

                scottish lass;1391015 wrote: Looking forward to maybe adopting Ladybirds advice of gently, gently until it is no longer a problem, and hope to be able to live out Farrfalla's wish to drink champagne at my daughters wedding (I have two, so at least twice more :H).
                Good for you Scottish lass and I know what you mean about the surprise of not finishing a bottle. Before I started modding I just didn't put enough thought into things and would open a bottle at home and go back for "just one more" until the bottle was gone. It was so nice to reach a point of buying a cork device that takes the air out of the bottle and saving it for another day after having only one or two glasses.

                I never commented to Ladybird and want to say that was a beautiful post of "gently, gently until it is no longer a problem". A lot of folks find after abstaining for 30 days that they don't even have much of a desire to keep drinking in their lives. It's always interesting to see how things work for people. A book I read recently entitled "Sober for Good" talked about a fellow who felt the up side of not drinking began to outweigh the downside. So for him the couple of hours of pleasure weren't worth the price he paid when he didn't sleep as well, feel as motivated or feel as good about himself. We all have our own path to find our way out. Glad you are finally on the journey to find yours!
                :l
                Eve11
                "Control your destiny or somebody else will"

                ~Jack Welsh~:h

                God grant me the serenity to accept the people I cannot change, the courage to change the one I can, and the wisdom to know it's me. ~Author unknown, :thumbs:

                Comment


                  October Mod Squad

                  Eve11;1391014 wrote: The recipe for my favorite drink is 3/4 seltzer (prefer pellegrino or perrier) 1/4 lite cranberry and a lime slice. Tasty!
                  :l
                  Eve11
                  That sounds delish!! If anyone is doing low carb, a good recipe for a Salted Caramel Latte is, 3 T of HWC (heavy whipping cream), SF brown sugar (substitute), plus a dash of salt...heat in microwave then pour your cup of joe on top, stir and enjoy! Could also whip some cream with Splenda or other sweetener of your choice to go on top!

                  Of course, if you're not doing LC, use regular brown sugar and if you don't care for HWC, use half and half. I bet it's also mmmmmmmmmmm

                  ----------------

                  Eve, you asked me earlier about book reviews. I wrote a reply and lost it in cyberspace, lol. I write book reviews for Library Journal magazine. Unpaid, but they send me a new book about once a month that's pre-publication and I have about two weeks to turn in a review electronically. I've had one published in the magazine, one published on their website, one slated for the November publication and one I'm reading now. Also as a "reward" of sorts, you are sent a hardback copy of the book after publication for you to keep. As far as how it pertains to my job, it's just a bonus that I hope goes in my favor when I'm next up for promotion! Fingers crossed.


                  "I like people too much or not at all."
                  Sylvia Plath

                  Comment


                    October Mod Squad

                    Hi all,

                    I used to be a binger "big time" and 10 years ago cut back to a bottle of wine and couple of ciders a day for health reasons.
                    I know it's still too much and I want to come lower but haven't found out how to re-cork a wine bottle.
                    I'm scottish as well so how do you do it Scottish Lass.

                    Tried stopping altogether but found that really boring, the AL free friends I've got don't seem that happy about it but have no choice, I think I do.
                    It's not what you drink, it's how much!

                    Comment


                      October Mod Squad

                      LG & Eve - Both those drinks sound sooooooo yummy, unfortunately I LOVE coffee but my tummy HATES it...... Eve, I put the ingredients for yours on my grocery list.... I think hubby will love it for his AF days, both days I found him staring into fridge and I asked him are you staring at the beers and he said no I am looking for something to drink, all we keep is water and some morning juices (like naked juice), we don't drink soda or tea or anything usually so I want to surprise him Tuesday on his AF day with your Mocktail

                      Lass some of your comments sound right inline with ones we have all made here on the Mod threads so glad to hear......

                      I can not tell you guys how great I am feeling with 4 AF evenings behind me and 5 days of healthy eating and exercise.... I am sooo excited to be getting back to ME

                      As many of you know my problem drinking started a couple of years back when I decided to loose quite a bit of weight, I did not want to give up my nightly beers but I cut down to 2 bud select (55 calories and half the AL) a night, well it left me wanting more to get to that relaxed state so instead I started doing a shot or two of liquor and then a beer or two.... well that got WAY out of hand.....

                      So when I decided to get back on the healthy eating and exercise routine I was worried, but I will tell you what I think has and is going to make the BIGGEST difference.... just going AF during the week, if I don't start to have a drink at all I am not disappointed when the 2 have not gotten me where I want to be and bitter that hubby keeps going. Not to mention I just feel SOOOOOOOOOO much better.

                      That being said, tonight hubby and I plan to go to an early movie and then meet some friends after for a few drinks. I know I will want a beer and I know they will not have my low calorie beer so I am thinking I will have one Light beer and then get a large plain ice tea with lemon and a shot or two in it and sip on that. Do you guys think it is worrisome that I'm debating liquor vs. beer due to calories again? Obviously I must be a bit myself or I would not be asking. Since I have stopped the pint plus 6 pack a day habit, I have gone out and had a shot on several different occasions and it has not sent me back into my spiral, I have had liquor in the house for weeks now and haven't touched it.... Sorry I am thinking as I write here..... I guess if I have 3-4 light beers I am looking at 300-400 calories and if I have one light beer and an iced tea with 2 shots I am looking at about 220 calories doing the math like that makes me think I should just stick to the beers and just burn the extra calories at the gym in the morning.

                      Sorry guys, I did mean to write this for help, but honestly figured it out as I was writing, was going to delete but figure I will post anyway just to share for sharing sake.

                      Well it is FRIDAY, I am in the best mood, got a ton of work to do!

                      Hope everyone else has a FANTASTIC day
                      And it's hard to dance with a devil on your back so shake him off ~ Florence and the Machine

                      Comment


                        October Mod Squad

                        I'm in a great mood too. So glad it's Friday!!! Bf and I have plans to go golfing tomorrow and if this weather holds out, it's going to be beautiful. I hear you on contemplating liquor, V. I was in the grocery store yesterday and saw some Margarita mixer with 0 sugar and my mouth started watering at the prospect of making low-carb margaritas, lol. Then I thought, no I will drink too much if I allow myself to drink liquor...so, didn't buy it, but it still seems more appealing than any other drink I can think of right now. Good luck on your decision.

                        Lass, welcome. Good job on cutting back. I think you'll find that you want to challenge yourself to drink less and less, and even try some AF nights as you continue posting here. It takes a little willpower, but once you do it a few times it gets easier and easier. We'll be here to support you all the way!

                        Ok! Back to work and ticking off the hours till quittin' time!!


                        "I like people too much or not at all."
                        Sylvia Plath

                        Comment


                          October Mod Squad

                          Hey Lass,
                          We had a major discussion about a post that I did but I do believe in harm reduction and I wonder if you would have come to our board and sought help to reduce your drinking if our board like S.M.A.R.T. only gave you the choice to totally quit. Would you have sought help?

                          Even though we get a little grief over here for believing some people can moderate, I think it's a good start to start reducing your intake and see where you go from there. An old mod friend who is now abstinent wrote a beautiful post that I would love to cut and paste over here as she discusses her journey of cutting back over here to eventually realizing abstaining made her life more enjoyable. It's so wonderfully written so when I get permission I will share it with everyone. The main thing however, is that we start reducing what we are drinking so that if we are drinking, we are taking in safer amounts. Congrats for starting to cut back and we are here for you 100%!
                          :l
                          Eve11
                          "Control your destiny or somebody else will"

                          ~Jack Welsh~:h

                          God grant me the serenity to accept the people I cannot change, the courage to change the one I can, and the wisdom to know it's me. ~Author unknown, :thumbs:

                          Comment


                            October Mod Squad

                            Hello :new:

                            Thought I'd pop in and say hello. I'm another one who resonates with the Ladybird Approach. I've also done Eve's test and scored 11. I've felt a lot less anxious recently as I choose not to beat myself up anymore if I haven't been totally abstinent. My 'habits' have changed dramatically since I've been here and I consider that a success. I love my AF times and they are growing. I do find posting 'slips' very difficult now because it makes me feel like such a failure which, I believe, hinders my progress. So I'm on board for the gently, gently approach until it's just not a problem anymore. That's where I feel I'm at right now. Taking the pressure off myself. Thanks for listening.
                            You were born with wings, why prefer to crawl through life? Rumi

                            :lilangel:

                            Comment


                              October Mod Squad

                              Hello my friend, FF. Glad to have you here because, selfishly, I enjoy your point of view. Whatever you decide is the best route for you and your life is your choice. It's YOUR way out. Hope to see you around often.

                              LG


                              "I like people too much or not at all."
                              Sylvia Plath

                              Comment


                                October Mod Squad

                                Hello Everyone

                                I just popped in to wish you all a great weekend (it's Friday evening here in the UK) whatever your plans are...

                                Free Fly - great to see you here with the 'modders' wherever any of us eventually end up eh! These folk are great. I read some of your posts on Eve's excellent thread 'Can you Moderate?'. You are in the right place here.

                                Please to see that the angst seems to have died down...

                                I am off to try out an Indian tapas Bar tonight (1st time I ever heard of one of those...) I may even have a glass of wine or Indian beer.

                                Cheers all. Have a fab time.

                                x
                                If you think you're free, there's no escape possible. ~Ram Dass

                                Comment

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