I don't want to be totally AF......,

[ducky]

Oh and with regards to your question about running, I don't go far. 2-3 miles per run a few times a week. Lots of walking too.

[ducky]

Good going TMH. I'll bet the coffee was awesome.

[ToMyHealth]

It worked! Stayed a little over an hour at the Social Hour, visited with many, ate a little more than usual. Got in pj's, had a cup of sleep inducing tea, took 2 Ibuprofen PM and slept just fine!

Hi Frances! I wasn't concerned about what people thought. If anything, I felt proud of myself. But then I don't relate to folks who switched up liquor stores or hid wine under groceries, etc. not that I don't understand it. IMO, People aren't that interested in what you are buying.

Love how coffee tastes after an AF day! Feel splendid.

[frances]

Go for it TMH! Having another alternative drink ready with you is a great idea. It will require strength and determination especially since you will be at a group social event. Be ready for those drinking thoughts and how you plan to back them off (I would literally talk back - FU AL...I don't care what you think, I don't like you, Go away). I always worried about events and what people would thing/say but I found that noone really cared...having a non alcoholic drink in your hand helps tremendously and as long as they have their own, they don't really give a damn what you are doing!

You can do this!

[ToMyHealth]

Today is the day! For sure. And yes, we start with our bi-monthly community Happy Hours tonight. But there is something almost every night. Going to make a healthy veggie plate with dips to share and be armed with my tonic water & lime & looking forward to it!

TMH

[Stewarts]

Well, I haven't been doing my 30 days of AL free, I probably should. Good news, things have pretty much been in control. I went to a Halloween party on Saturday, that might have been the one night in a long time I took some liberties and really wasn't that bad. We were home by a reasonably time. its all good. I think.

[ToMyHealth]

Well the best laid plans........and I am not going to set myself up for failure so will post back when this actually happens.....today or tomorrow.

[ToMyHealth]

How did it go, Blue? Any specific plan moving forward? No pressure, just curious.

I am going to go AF tomorrow, Nov 1 and shoot for the entire month. We are still on the road. Have 600 mi to go and have decided to take it easy, break it down into 2 days, tour Savannah, go for a nice walk and lunch. Smell the roses.

Perfect time for me. On Monday we are having dinner with friends where we are presenting information about an interventionist. One of our friend's wife is in serious trouble, he & dd recognize it but say there isn't a dang thing they can do about it. Her medical records are sealed. So don't feel it appropriate to have drink in hand. This month I play in a golf tourney with teetotaling friend. She's a good influence. Quit just because she didn't feel well while still drinking. Then her dh had a bad night, terrific hangover, said that's it and has done the same. I always think how good they must feel.....everyday. Envious? Yes! And I, too, can do it!

TMH

[NoraC]

Blue - I am so sorry to hear about your sister.

[blue1]

Hey guys....
This will be my first AF day since my sister passed.....I really need it!

Frances....hang in there....I'm praying for you and your mom.

Hey Stew!!! I'm glad things worked out with your girlfriend.

Have a successful day!!!

[frances]

Stewart, 30 days AF sounds like a great idea. I bet you will be surprised how good you feel!

We found out my mom doesn't have multiple myeloma - it's metastatic lung cancer that is now in her spine. She never smoked her entire life, has always exercised, eats healthy, etc. - it's just so hard to accept. But we are moving forward. The biopsy still hasn't been done so that will happen early next week and then we expect that treatment will start and hopefully something to help her with the pain she's having. I lie awake and think about how she must be lying awake too, and scared. I am so hopeful that this can be successfully treated.

[Stewarts]

Hey Blue sorry for your loss, but you sound like you have a good perspective on it. As for the drinking, while we are trying to help each other not drink or moderate here, don't beat yourself up over it, it doesn't sound like you are...it also doesn't sound like your in any danger from it..if it continues, well, then you may want to re-evaluate.

So, my gf and I decided to do a 30 day abstaining from AL. We were at event last night and we were drinking, nothing crazy, then I put her in a cab home. She then started texted me all this weird stuff... she was doubting our relationship, saying I was too spoiled, etc. It made me go to the bar and have two beers I didn't want to calm her down over the phone. She just turned 38, I'm 40, so I get it... women at this age have the the narrowing gap of wanting to start a family so time is overly precious, and perhaps it was on her mind... so I eventually convinced her that was what I want. I know this was all AL influenced. She texted me in the morning, sayying she was hungover, should've ate more, and apologized. I didn't think she drank that much, but apparently she did. Perhaps its good this happened when she got home. I told her it was ok, that she just had something on her mind and not to sweat it...and I genuinely meant that.

So today I asked her why don't we go 30 days with no AL. She agreed and seems very happy with this decision.

j.

[frances]

That's a shame about your sister's boyfriend. It sounds like it's very hard for him. I wish I had advice - grief is hard and time does help.

I'm very anxious about my mom's situation. We have her oncologist appointment tomorrow and then lots more tests to get the final diagnosis. She's an inspiration to me and I can't stand the thought of her being sick. I need to start getting prepared mentally but I am also trying to stay optimistic. No drinking for me though. Two years ago I would have been drinking like crazy right now and every day. Not that I needed something like this to happen to drink back then, but it definitely would have had me hitting the bottle more than ever!

[blue1]

My sister's memorial service is Saturday. We are feeling quite nervous about her boyfriend...he keeps saying he can't live without her. He's been drunk since it happened and he's not really eating.

My niece talked to management this morning...and if he qualifies he can continue to live there....if not he has about 14 days from last Wednesday to vacate the premises....he has nowhere else to go. He has children but they live with their mom and her husband. He says he is going back to his country...
He just cries constantly.

[blue1]

First of all, Blue, please accept my sincere condolences on the loss of your sister. I truly hope your days are starting to look a bit brighter.

And Frances, my goodness. Yes, it is scary. Will pray that the drs can come up with a treatment plan that will give your Mom many more years!

Thank you TMH!