I don't want to be totally AF......,

[blue1]

Hey guys....just checking in. On top of everything else Monday I had to make an emergency appointment to see my doctor....I was having a severe asthma attack and didn't know it. I usually only have to use my inhaler a few times throughout the winter....but now every 2-3 hours and antibiotics....and plenty of rest (when I'm not coughing and peeing myself lol)...I had to buy poise bladder pads lol.

Hope everyone is having a successful day!

[frances]

Hi Blue - cross post! Good to see you. Sorry you've been having a hard time. It must be so hard.

[frances]

I agree, it's hard to be around drinking and not drink. For me, my drinking was also daily, just myself drinking at home. I have successfully
broken that habit and it has been a tremendous help for those additional social drinking situations. Easier to say no at some of them, and for the ones where I do have a drink, it's easier now for me to just have one or two.

Stewart I can see where having responsibilities helps one live better - that's a great observation. Having meaningful things to do instead of partying with a group or drinking alone...yes, that definitely makes me live better too.

TMH I know how it can be when someone unexpectedly hands you a drink. If you really don't want to drink I guess you need to prepare for that. I was 9 months AF with no intention of drinking when that happened to me. And when that person handed me the drink, I drank it! I was shocked at how easily that happened. Luckily it did not result in a major downward spiral for me, and actually about a month later I decided to go ahead and try moderating.

My dinner with the family last weekend went very well. We had a nice meal and everyone sat around and talked for a long time after. I had a couple of wine spritzers equaling probably 1.5 drinks total. I like doing that as a way to keep down the quantity and I had straight seltzer in between the drinks too. Worked great. Mom is feeling much better after radiation treatments to her back. We meet her oncologist Monday who wants to start treatment shortly after Mom finishes radiation (which is on Tuesday) - so, we'll finally have an idea of what the treatment might be. That will tell us a lot about how life will be impacted - e.g., will she have to go somewhere for chemo infusions, or will she be taking oral chemo, etc. - and then of course, waiting to see how she responds to it and what side effects she has. A great unknown right now.

But I'm glad to not be drowning my sorrows about this. Mom needs me and I will be here and present mentally, any time, day or night, for her.

[blue1]

Hey guys!!! I've been missing in action cause I couldn't get my emotions and thoughts together....I was drinking like a fish and doing a lot of crying. I didn't think it would be this challenging with my sister's passing but there's also some other crap I'm dealing with....we have been claiming my daughter and her children since they came into the world. This was supposed to be our last year claiming her and both children....next year we were supposed to only claim her daughter....but last week my daughter changed her mind and told me she's claiming them and giving her youngest child's father half. He only stepped up about 2 months ago and really ain't doing nothing!!!!

But I'm getting the modding back under control! Don't want to post more just incase I lose this post....you guys know that pisses me off lol

Have a successful Friday!!!

[Stewarts]

yeah, being around AL events and trying not to drink can be tough. I've done it before, but lately, I've been pretty bad at it. Good news. I think I'm seeing the light. I haven't been in any bad situations, but I think I had to really come to terms that I really have a gf and might be getting married again soon. I was in a minor debt situation, which was easily fixable, which I made the arrangements for last night. Point, when I start stacking up responsibility, I start living better. Honestly, I've been pretty bad at modding this past month. Not that I was drinking every day, but when I did, it was like an event. Everything is all good. But it's time for me to start taking care of myself again.

[ducky]

Glad you did well at golf! I think it is very hard to be around alcohol if you are not drinking, especially if your quit is new. Seems like the AF crew avoid those events until they are secure. Good job moderating though. Sounds like you have a handle on things.

[ToMyHealth]

Well, shoot, that totally didn't work. Last night was celebration of reopening of our Clubhouse after being remodeled. I'm totally busy talking with people and got handed a glass of chardonnay, just nonchalantly took it and started drinking. Then later the manager offered to buy me a drink, dh told him what kind of wine I like and had another.

Man, that was crazy. I can see why if you really, really knew you needed to stop you had better steer clear of those outings.

Good news is had a great day at golf...best I've played in weeks. So done with counting days, etc. just going back to,regular life.

[Eloise]

more like a giant poodle Sam!!

[Eloise]

Hans looks very handsome Ducky!
My last dachshund was also an adoption and oh my goodness was she a special girl! She absolutely ruled our lives (in a good way).
Good luck w/your new longhair. I refer to Mozart as my horse, but I have not bought him yet. He is an old race horse, 21 yrs old, and his days are numbered. I only met him in January and it would be silly for me to buy him now, they almost put him down last year but he rallied. For now I ride him and care for him and that has to be good enough for us.
I absolutely love him if you cannot tell.
If we happen to move out of immediate area then I will have to discuss with the stable what kind of deal can be made as I do not plan to leave him behind.

[ducky]

Yes Samstone. The rest of the litter are all around 50 lbs. He is the freak! And a wild boy.

[Samstone]

80 lb poodle??!! Standard?

[ducky]

Hi all. TMH good luck with your AF plan. Sounds like it is going well. Eloise that is our rescue guy Hans. We lost him several years ago but he was the most awesome dog despite having just one tooth and a tongue that hung out! We have a longer haired Doxie now and an 80 pound poodle! Do you have horses?

[Eloise]

Oh and with regards to your question about running, I don't go far. 2-3 miles per run a few times a week. Lots of walking too.

Like your weinie Ducky! (Referring to picture)

[ToMyHealth]

Frances, how did dinner go? You have a good attitude about your Mom. It is scary. Hopefully, she will be able to tolerate whatever "cocktail" they come up with for her. I had 6 months of chemo and was fortunate, not a lot of side effects. And the good news: that was 12 yrs ago.
Hey, Blue, where are you? Ducky?
I'm taking a break from drinking. Was originally thinking 30 days, now I'm thinking gosh, that means Thanksgiving too. Usually my breaks last 2 weeks, so 3 weeks is definitely better, and that is exactly Thanksgiving Day. Have time to think about it. I'm surprised I don't feel 100% better. Maybe too high expectations? Oh, and realize it hasn't been all that long.
Alright, off to do my 4th mile. Ran/walked outside for 2 mi, now doing Leslie Sansone walking DVD.
TMH

[frances]

Hi everyone - checking in - good for you TMH I'm so glad you are feeling so good!

I'm looking forward to having my mom and brothers over for dinner today - I am worried about mom's treatment and how that is going to impact us being able to do this type of thing, so I wanted to make the most of the time now that we have. She'll most likely be starting treatment within the next couple of weeks, but we don't know just what it will be yet and of course we have no idea how it is going to affect her. My sister in law has offered to host thanksgiving so none of us have to worry about it - but who knows how mom will be feeling by then? I hate thinking about all of the 'what ifs'.

I'm just going to enjoy today and worry about tomorrow when it comes.

And hello to you both Ducky and Blue - hope you are having a good weekend!