I don't want to be totally AF......,

[blue1]

Hi guys....

Yes....Frances...it is very painful.
Qupid....Bandid's brother was looking around for him the first couple of days.....and they always shared each other's beds....but Qupid wouldn't lay on Bandid's until today....broke my heart.....he looks so sad.
We had them since they were 6 weeks old they will be 12 years tomorrow....well...Qupid will.....
We really need some really good stuff to happen in our lives.....I just want to heal from all these passings....

I drank hard Thursday and Friday.....Saturday was a little bit better....yesterday I didn't have much....
and I'll take it easy today....would like to say I'll be AF....but I already told hubby to bring some home.....
Please keep us in your prayers.

Hope everybody is well!

Have a successful day!

[frances]

blue - You will my prayers!

AG - where are you?

Stewart - hope all is going OK these days.

[actiongirl46]

Hi guys, I'm here! Took a trip to Chicago this week with hubs for our anniversary. We needed it and had a lot of fun.

I am up way too late tonight so will post more tomorrow.

Thanks for asking about me Frances!! Blue, I am so sorry about your dog. That sounds terrible.

More later!! AG

[actiongirl46]

Hey Blue, how are you today?? :hug:

[frances]

Yes Blue, how are you? I hope you can focus on the joy your dog brought you and the good memories. It must be so hard not having him with you.

I'm feeling very blah today - have had a sore throat the past two days and just feeling run down. Cold, allergies, who knows? I'm looking forward to feeling better. No drinking since the end of February and no plans to. I go on vacation the last week of March to Miami Beach....I'm really really looking forward to that!

[actiongirl46]

Hi Frances, I hope you feel better. Lots of nasty colds/flu stuff going on around here.

Great job on not drinking. I was tempted today but managed to get through it. So much for my 30 day stint in March though. I'll have to try that one again when I am ready to really commit. I am very reluctant to take that step, tbh, not sure why other than I just don't want to . . .

Vacation in Miami Beach is something to look forward to!! Start packing, maybe that will help : )

[frances]

Thanks AG! I think I feel better this morning - my throat does at the moment, anyway. My husband, on the other hand, is sick with a very nasty stomach bug. I'm doing everything I can to make sure the rest of us don't get it including cleaning with a bleach solution and sleeping on the couch last night. Fingers crossed it works!

Being ready to commit to AF time is definitely hard! For me, it took many times of overdoing it and feeling terrible the next day. Usually it was a ''worse than usual" type of scenario where I drank more than usual and was really feeling bad, rather than my usual state of just feeling a little tired and sluggish and dull, which was how I felt every other day just due to my daily drinking of a couple to a few every night. This happened more than once over the years and then I'd come back here and try again. Never anything majorly terrible (I'm grateful for that) but bad enough and often enough. The worst part for me was feeling like AL was controlling me. I didn't want to go anywhere that AL wouldn't be. And every day, it was on my mind until I could get my fix. I didn't feel normal unless I had it. Anyway - you'll find your time and your way - I'm just glad you're here :happy2:

[actiongirl46]

Thanks Frances. I appreciate your very wise words. They make a lot of sense to me . . . you're the best! I am figuring this out, perhaps slowly but at my own pace, overall I am grateful and really glad to be here.

[frances]

Good morning everyone! About to start the last work week before my vacation yay! :happy2:

Since we won't be getting together on Easter my mom had everyone over yesterday and we had a great meal at her house and a celebration for my sil's birthday. I enjoyed a small glass of wine with appetizers followed by a diet coke and then another small glass of wine with dinner. I'm guessing ~2.5 oz in the glass both times. We had a nice time. The weekend otherwise was non eventful. I somehow managed to neglect all the piles of laundry so I'm gonna be busy this week! And despite my efforts over the past couple of weeks, I have managed to gain 2 pounds and not lose! I admit that over this past weekend I just ate what I wanted because I was frustrated that my dieting wasn't working. I've always lost weight easily but now that I'm hitting menopause it seems to have impacted that. I'll try again this week and will see if I can add exercise to the strategy since changing eating habits hasn't been working.

Hope all are well - Blue I'm still thinking of you and your husband and other dog...how are you guys doing??

[actiongirl46]

Hey Frances, sounds like you and your family are feeling better. That's a good thing before vacation!

Blue - what's going on???

Stewart?? Check-in please!

Happy Monday :victorious:

[blue1]

Hey guys....we are all feeling better these days....each day is getting a little easier to except all the changes going on in our lives.

My drinking has still been out of control....today will be my first AF day in quite a while....there's no AL in the house...so that's a plus.
I have to admit...I feel kinda scared for some reason.....maybe cause I'll be feeling my emotions with no AL....I'll keep you guys posted.
I'm suppose to babysit this evening....I usually have a few sips when I babysit....just to calm my nerves...at least that's what I tell myself....I don't get drunk or anything just a couple of sips....so we'll see how this goes. I haven't kept them in a while.

Frances did you start your vacation yet?

How are you doing AG?

Stew....how are you?

Hope everybody is having a successful day!!!

[blue1]

Ok.....not a good idea to agree to babysit on your first AF day in a while my nerves are fried!
My daughter was supposed to come get them at 8pm....it's now 10:23pm.....won't be doing this again anytime soon....

[actiongirl46]

Hang in there Blue!! You got this!!

[frances]

I hope it got better for you Blue!

[blue1]

Hi guys....I MADE IT!!!! Lol
Their mom didn't get here until around 11:30pm....
I slept pretty good....but when I got up around 4am...to go to the bathroom...I could hardly make it down the steps....my back hurts....my knees hurt...and my shoulder hurts....
that's from picking up and chasing a 1year old for hours lol

Hope everybody is having a successful day!!!