Just Joy - June Week 1

[Lavande]

Just Joy - June Week 1

Jolie, these storms keep coming & going. Nearly 11 pm & I'm sitting here watching the light show outside my window. So far so good though

Fly, I feel so bad about your chronic migraine situation.
Wish I had some words of wisdom for you. Have you thought about accupuncture? It couldn't hurt & just may give you some relief. Feel better soon.

OK, I'll say goodnight before I get kicked off the internet.

[sdlovespackers]

Just Joy - June Week 1

Late Check in!!

Lav--hope all the storms passed you with no troubles!!

Fly--sorry about your migraines...don't have them...but I am pretty whimpy when it come to a headache so I can only imagine!!! OUCH!!!

LBH--thoughts for you and your uncle! :l

Sunni--HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!!!:day5: Woohoo!!!!

Chill--Awesome name for June..thanks for getting us started!! Speaking of joy...had another date tonight!! He's SUCH a sweetheart!!!:h DANG IT!!! lol!

Pap3--have fun and relax on your days off....OR get rid of the bunnies!!! LOL!!! just kidding!!!

I'm heading to bed.....I'll check in tomorrow....good night!!
SD

[Lavande]

Just Joy - June Week 1

Good morning Joyful Ones!

Yes, Matilda was up bright & early at 5:45 this morning........
Although to be fair, I couldn't take her out much last night due to the storms. We had lots of rain & wind but no damage & the chicken house is still here

SD, nice on the date

I am going to save up my energy today - watching the grandsons this evening.
Hope eveyone has a great AF Saturday!

Lav

[Jolie]

Just Joy - June Week 1

SD - glad to hear you had such a nice date - going to see him again?

Watching the news and all the damage from the storms last night. We were extremely lucky - just some wind and rain - nothing to the extreme.

Papmom - what with yesterday being the one year anniversary of the tornado in your area, hope these storms weren't headed your way. Thanks for the info on the turkey babies! Poults - who knew? (Papmom did )

Grocery store and cleaning on my agenda - boy that sounds really boring. Hoping we can have a campfire tonight - temperature has definitely dropped and I'm loving it.

What's everyone else got planned for today!

Whatever it is, make it a great one!

[FlyAway]

Just Joy - June Week 1

Well I'm home from work today because I took my migraine meds yesterday and I have to have 24 hours down after taking them. But I do go in for the midnight shift tonight. My head actually feels pretty good now but I'm zonked out by the meds. Just need to sleep it off. Sound familiar? :H Good Lord why did I choose to feel this way for so many years? Ugh.

Lav and Jolie, so glad that you made it through those storms safe and sound. I was looking at the weather radar last night and it looked like there were bands of severe weather around where you live. I poured really hard here and I'm about an hour and a half east of you.

Lav--Poor little Matilda held it in as long as she could! :H When ya gotta go ya gotta go. I've thought about acupuncture but haven't actively pursued it. I guess it's worth a shot. Because of my job I'm pretty restricted in what meds I can take so more natural stuff is better to begin with.

SD--Great news about your date! You deserve good things in your life.

Jolie--Your agenda sounds like my agenda today. I've been putting off the grocery store as long as possible.

[papmom3]

Just Joy - June Week 1

Morning Joyous Ones!!

It's a monsoon out there today with Tstorms later on. I was very good and packed my car up last nite when I got home from the western ma chorus competition/outlet shopping trip with sis and neice. Gotta love this AF life! 2 years ago I would have rushed into the house panting in anticipation of opening a bottle and would have paid the price today in hangover and getting soaking wet loading up my car.

Had a very nice day with the girls. There was a Dress Barn with a good sale going on and I picked up a beautiful blazer and new black pants for only $10 over my gift card. So should I get a call back I am set but if not its a great work outfit. Almost got a pair of THE cutest black/white strappy sandles with a heel and flower but restrained myself. Maybe they'll go on sale in August. My sis bought them. Jealous.

SD-so excited about your second date!! Sounds like you didn't want this to work out tho. Jitters? Totally understandable. Go with the flow-you can do this now.

Off to do some laundry sans dryer (LR will be clothsline) and I'll leave by 1:30.

[Chillgirl]

Just Joy - June Week 1

Happy Saturday Guys

Papmom - oh yes the dreaded packing for trips! I was always in holiday mode the night before and would do my packing while drinking a bottle of wine. Many times I have opened up the case at the other end with essential items missing. once I had no underwear and was no where near any shops for 3 days! And then there is the traveling with a hangover :yuk:

FlyAway - glad you are feeling better and yes it's a good reminder of the ridiculous self inflicted pain we suffered.

Sorry you guys are having some wacky weather. It's chilly, damp and grey here which is a pity as it is our Queen's Diamond Jubillee weekend with Mon & Tues official holidays. There are celebrations all over the Country with street parties and fireworks and Royal events all over London. There are even rumors that Prince Harry with sing at a pop concert on Monday being staged at Buckingham Palace. (his current girlfriend is in a girl band). There are flags everywhere and it would have been so good if the sun had shined.

My date is cooking me dinner tonight but I have to say I'm having real jitters and 2nd thoughts about the whole thing. I keep thinking of all the reasons he isn't suitable, like he doesn't really like dogs and he smokes which are two really non negotiable issues with me. However I have loved his company and he is very charismatic and unusual.

Much as I would love to find a partner, there is a huge part of me that doesn't want to give up the solitary cocoon I have built around me where I feel safe. It seems every time I step out and dip my toe in the water it always feels like there is too much of me I have to give up in order to make a relationship work. At 47 I'm just not as flexible as I was at say 27 and I don't seem to be able to compromise.

[papmom3]

Just Joy - June Week 1

Hey Chill-luckily I was just packing for my demo today but I totally get the whole trip packing while hungover. Done it many many times and usually left it to the last minute!!
You know chill, your rebirth is really only seconds old in the whole cosmos of things. You are still getting to know this new you and you are very protective of her as well you should be. Those two things are non negotialbe with me too and no matter how charismatic the guy was I wouldn't be able to go any further than friends with him. When the right person comes along, you will not feel as tho you are "giving up' yourself to him-it will be more like a melding of souls and you will get as much from him as you give. It just hasn't happened yet but it will because I do beleive you are meant to share this new life with someone-it just isn't the right time or person. Let it flow and he'll appear. :l

[sdlovespackers]

Just Joy - June Week 1

Chill-
I sorta, kinda know what you mean...I keep thinking it's just so much easier to be by myself...I like being able to do my own thing...if I meet someone, how much of what I DO and who I am will change....will I have to share...everything?? WIll he have to know about, you all for instance...I love having this special place to come to...my special friends that i refer to often...or the daily routine my son and I have established for ourselves...how would anyone else fit into that??

So....I've been out with this guy now 3 times and I've enjoyed myself so much every time...and every time before I go, I try to tell myself, I'm not going to have fun or I remind myself while getting ready (and I'm stressing out about the way I look) this is the exact reason I hate dating...because I could care less about getting all dolled up for anyone!! :H But dang it, when I'm with him, he's so polite, sincere, funny...has ordered coke every time we went out...doesn't smoke, has 2 sons of his own that are with him part time (6 and 7)....said if he was with a women that wanted to have a child together of their own, he would. I'm trying SOOO hard to find something wrong with him!!!! I'm trying so hard to not think about him today and I can't....it's like I want this to happen but I don't...I don't want things to change in my life....but i do...I'm scared....I don't want to get hurt....and then in the back of my mind I always have that nagging...you've only been sober (almost) a year....you're not that strong yet....are you ever?? Will I always battle...is it something you tell someone???

Sorry...this maybe isn't a post....more like SD's thoughts on her dating experience...perhaps I need a journal!!:H Gawd--I feel like I'm in junior high...good one Counselor!!
Sorry to ramble...maybe this isn't at all the things that go through your or other people's head....who haven't dated ....in 4 years....had a bit of a dry spell!!!:H
SD

[Kaslo]

Just Joy - June Week 1

Hi everyone, just checking in to the June Joy thread. Its kind of heartwarming reading of dating and what everyone is up to on this thread. I hope you all dont mind my visiting here.

I am not sure I would even want to try and find another mate if I lost mine, now. ANd sometimes I wonder if its worth it to tear it all apart and go my own way. Entropy keeps me married I think.

And by the way I love the title of this thread. Joy...I have it back now. It creeps up on me once in a while, and surprizes me, and I really dont think I have experienced it completely for a long long time, either. Its a lovely feeling.


kaslo

[Chillgirl]

Just Joy - June Week 1

Good morning Guys

Kaslo - good to see you and love that you have found your joy again.

SD - he sounds wonderful! Just enjoy every second of it. I know what you mean about getting dolled up, I'm happiest in my faded jeans and have no desires to go any place fancy where they are not acceptable. I decided that if a guy doesn't like me that casual then he's not for me anyway. I also feel exactly the same as you about wanting it and not wanting it. But if it feels right you will find ways to adapt your life so it fits.

Papmom - oh what wise words and you were spot on! Ever thought of being a relationship counselor? The evening was a disaster as I had already so many doubts I was on edge.. It didn't help with him pouring out his heart to me about how much he felt about me, I was not prepared and was stuck for words. I had to awkwardly explain that I couldn't see us having a relationship and would prefer to just be friends. It wasn't taken well and I made a sharp exit. *sigh* Well it's put me off again but I joined this dating site for 3 months and will persevere a little longer. I do like my solitary life but ultimately I want to share my life with someone.

Sorry for turning the thread into a dating advice line but we do always cover the topics in our lives and I love to get anyone else's thoughts. It's pouring with rain and having walked Elle I'm back in bed with my coffee.

[Lavande]

Just Joy - June Week 1

Good morning joyful Ones & don't worry -
You will never hear any dating advice from me. It seriously would be a cold day in hell before I ever step out again :H :H

chill, I am still licking my wounds & probably will be for a very long time. I have learned that what we think we want may not be in our best interest. Flying solo is what I need more than anything right now

SD, now you just may be on the right path ~ good for you
I hope everything works out perfectly for you!

Greetings to Kaslo, Papmom & all the usuals.
I hope to get some weeds out of my garden today before they take over. I harvested a huge trash bag full of broccoli yesterday & have to decide what to do with it today. Oh & I will be feeding son & family later today (what else is new? :H )

Wishing everyone a wonderful AF Sunday.
Lav

[Stargazerlily]

Just Joy - June Week 1

Good morning on this beautiful June day...

The weather here is picture perfect, a little cool, sunny, birds singing, this is absolutely my favorite time of year.

Relationships...they are not easy and it is always give and take. Chill, sounds like you knew he was not the one, and it kind of concerned me that so soon he was getting so intense. I would think you would need more time to get to know someone. Plus, if someone did was not a cat person, they would be out. I know that sounds silly, but I love my pets. I had a friend who gave away her pets to get married, but allergies were involved. Still. SD, he sounds like a nice guy andyou two have lots in common, maybe just see where it goes. It's fun to go out and fulfilling to be with someone. I love the santuary of my marriage, we are there for each other, work together to run our home, our finances, our life. We agree on the big stuff, always have. The friendship piece is the most important part...what do you all think?

Yesterday I got so much done, it was awesome. Today, yardwork, planting some flowers, deadheading roses, I love to be outside.

To all, have a great Sunday.

[rustop59]

Just Joy - June Week 1

Hi everyone

Love hearing about all the dating. It brings back happy memories

Star - I agree regarding friendship. Hubby is probably my best friend and yes it does involve a lot of give and take. Being an only child I am happy with me time and could not live with him in my personal space allll the time. Its all about balance I suppose.

Well our summer is over before it even started. Its cold and wet here all day. Took the goldie out on the beach for a walk this morning and was nearly blown away. Such a contrast from this day last week when people were putting up their umbrellas for the day at 9 a.m.

Have to drive hubby to the airport so have to dash. Have a great Sunday everyone.

Rustop

[Rusty]

Just Joy - June Week 1

Good AF Evening, Just Joyous June Friends,

Chill-sorry your night turned out to be a disaster....but really, it was a blessing in disguise, wasn't it? I would not date someone who smokes, and if he didn't like dogs, forget it....we wouldn't even have a first date. Good for you for standing your ground. Well, I don't blame him for falling madly in love with you. You are beautiful and have a fabulous personality. Just sayin. Wayne Dyer was on TV yesterday and I was absolutely mesmerized by his words. He has a 3-hour program every Saturday afternoon on the public TV station here. I so enjoyed listening to him, and plan to order some of his books.

SD-I know what you mean about needing your own space, and about being gun shy.:l But ohhh....I love that feeling when you can't stop thinking about all day long. It's been a while since I had that feeling. As far as the drinking, you will know when the right time is to talk to him about it. Also, I had a thought....if this relationship progresses, you will probably meet his friends, and I think your friends mirror you. If his friends are nice, that's a good sign. If they're losers, um, that would give me pause. Also, I have these incredible photos of Clay Matthews....if you want to PM me your e-mail address, I'll send them to you. Once you see these pics, you'll forget all about the other guy.:H

Star-you asked about if the friends part of the relationship is the most important part-and I would agree. I also am a firm believer in that if you decide to have kids together, you have to have the same values and your philosophy on raising them have has to be in sync or the relationship will fall apart. I guess I'm jaded because I fell in love with a man who had 5 kids from his first marriage. They were adults by the time we were serious into the relationship, but his Bohemian theory on raising kids caused a huge problem with me. I subsequently broke off the relationship when I realized there was no way I would EVER like his kids. He's a lawyer....very bright, but when it comes to romantic relationships, he is a total failure and sooo dense. To this day, he can't understand why I would find his kids so problematic. Even though I dated someone before who had kids, it did not pose a problem at all. What I learned from my last relationship was that I want to be #1 in someone's life. I don't want to be #7, after the 5 kids and the ever-meddling and PIA ex-wife. I have no interest in dating.....and at 51, I am set in my ways, and because I've never lived with a guy, I am used to having EVERYTHING to myself. Plus, I've always been extremely independent, even when I was in my teens. Can you tell??:H

Maybe we should get a man's point of view. Yo, Bouv!! Dude, we need your opinion.

Fly, I hope your migraine goes away! What a drag to have to work the midnight shift when you're not feeling well.

Papmom-oh dear Lord, the drunken packing. Yup, been there, done that....then wondering why I had 3 pairs of shoes and no undies in my luggage. Sheesh. Never again.

Lav-I hope you've had a restful day.

A shoutout and happy hello to Rustop, Cyntree, Shelley, Dill, Sooty, LBH, Janice, and anyone I may have missed....have a peaceful AF evening.