One Step at a Time - October 2014

[Dottie Belle]

Morning all,
Foster doggie woke us up at 6am and barked for at least an hour....sigh......need to run his butt before bed time....
Gym later then more laundry. No clue how I got so far behind...
mama I agree with fen I dont think u can catch anything from the cat...
sun sorry the AB is giving u fits. I have never taken it but I am very sensitive to meds so I be I would if have.
Getting colder here. I am NOT looking forward to the time change this weekend here in the states. I hate it getting dark so early. Depressing. I wish they would just leave it alone and not mess with it....

[paulywogg]

Hey all,i'm with you on the time change Dots,i know in AZ and some other state they dont mess with it,i feel like i'm getting sick or its allergies or both,cant qit sneeking,congested,tired,dizzy same ole same ole,seems luke im always sick! probly f-ed up my immune system by drinking all those years grr,yes Fen get on the Recciemobile quest,i miss that,hello to all have a good Wednesday,back later

[K9Lover]

Morning all!
Still on the verge of tears all the time as the countdown continues. I HAVE to pick up my AB from the pharmacy today, if you catch my drift....don't wanna get into too many details but I am not dealing well...
I asked Sierra if my drinking in the past had anything to do with her wanting a change, and she said "a little bit". Well that pretty much broke my heart and made me feel like sh*t at the same time.
Sorry to be such a grumpster today, maybe things will improve as the day goes on...we can hope anyways.

Sorry to hear about the sinuses, back aches, cat snot, and sicknesses...at least nobody has Ebola.

Will check in later. Just can't shake the feeling that Sierra can't wait to get away from me, even though she has never said that. :sad:

[mama bear]

Oh K9.........hugs, hugs, and more hugs. My kids have made me feel that way, but in all honesty, she is at an age where they start to become so freaking independent. I can go days without seeing my boys, and I hate it, but I remember myself at that age and I wanted to be anywhere but home. So maybe you can look at it like that a little bit.
True - no Ebola here.....I already thought about that!:welldone:
I don't like the time change either...
I took some Alka Seltzer Plus last night and feel a little better. Why in the hell do I get a sinus infection every quarter????
Oh well....enough complaining. It is a gorgeous day here, and the three of us at work are working on our "Three Blind Mice" costumes!

[K9Lover]

Thanks for the hugs Mama, and right back at'cha!!! :heartbeat:

I'll just fess up to the rest of the group that yes, I have been drinking for about the past week. I am not handling the move, the no money, the impending bankruptcy and everything well at all. My parents say they feel completely shut out of my life, which then brings on MORE guilt. I have turned into quite a hermit, I admit it. If I were Sierra, I would want to leave too. So now the question is, WHAT do I do to change this situation? The FIRST thing is to take my AB TODAY!!! Things tend to get better when rum is not involved....

Thank you all for listening to me whine. Don't know what I'd do without you guys!!! :love::love:

[K9Lover]

I have my AB now....

[fennel]

Niner, I'm sorry...that had to be hard to hear. :hug:

[Dottie Belle]

K9 I am so sorry for all you are going through. I just cant imagine the pain u are feeling. Dont become a hermit here. Come and talk, vent or whatever makes u feel better. WE are here for you!!!

[sunshinedaisies]

I was just asked for proof of ID - for being a senior citizen !!!!!!! Made my day !!!!!!!

[Kradle123]

but you're still posting k9 and to me that is everything.. When I head down my personal rabbit hole, posting here...staying honest is about as attractive as eating dental floss... So usually disappear.

You will get through this...we will get through this with you. After all...Sierra- the many named one...- is sort of all our daughter now.....:heartbeat:

[Kradle123]

Isn't great getting carded Sun!! Though with you, I can certainly see why!!:love:

[K9Lover]

Way to go Sun!! They probably just assume that I am. I don't look as bright and fresh (if I ever did) these days.

Kradle, thanks for your kind words about Sierra/Adina/Whats-Her-Name....I promise to keep posting no matter what is going on. I know you guys love me despite all my flaws!! One last update, and then I will drop the subject for today. We had the following text conversation a couple hours ago:


Me: I love you sweet girl, I just can't shake this sad feeling.

WHN: I love you ma, it'll get easier

Me: I just feel like it's my fault

WHN: Its not your fault, no matter how much you think it is, it's not

Me: I feel like if I had done things different or something...

WHN: Stop. Thinking like that does nothing good for anyone.

Me: You deserve better than an alcoholic mom.

WHN: Mom, please stop. Just stop. I love you no matter what you are and hearing this makes me very upset. How can you be so negative on yourself when you're the only person that's always been there for me?

(at that point I went to the bathroom and shed a few tears)

Me: Sorry

WHN: You are absolutely amazing and I love you. This isn't your fault. This isn't anyone's fault. This is me learning how to live life outside of my boundaries. This isn't a punishment and this isn't me saying goodbye.

Me: Ok baby. I know. We can talk later. Love you.


Can we say EMOTIONALLY DRAINED....and yes, I have the AB and now I don't even want to take it??? :sad:

[mama bear]

Sierra is a very grown up, smart young lady. Her responses to you are very mature and right on. We love you unconditionally. And yes, Sierra/Adina has become an official Stepper Baby!!!!
Good news Sun!! Bet that made you smile.
Tucky came by with the baby today...very weird feeling.

[K9Lover]

Sometimes Sierra's responses make me feel like such a drama queen because she's being all mature and I'm throwing a hissy fit. LOL

Oh boy....what's lil 'Tucky Jr. look like? Toothless will only be cute for a while. LOL When is 'Tucky supposed to come back to work?

[mama bear]

Lil Tucky is precious.....he's so tiny!!
She proceeded to tell me her uterus is still swole and infected and she's on antibiotics....I see an extended leave request coming..................................