30 days, no wine, no junk, lots of exercise?

[Tipplerette]

30 days, no wine, no junk, lots of exercise?

Glad you didn't cave, Keeps and I totally understand the way it creeps up on you. The first few weeks were so easy for me that I relaxed too much I guess. You are so smart for being vigilant. Keep that antenae up all the time. I can relate to your dilemna about what to do in July. Moderating keeps us focused on the booze; that's the problem with moderating. I almost want to do an experiment and not come to this site for the month of July and to push the "do I drink" or "do I abstain" thoughts from my head for the month just to see if common sense will prevail. It sure beats analyzing every situation and every meal to death. Let me know what you decide to do and I wish you all the best in your decision.

Have a great day everyone

Tips

[Mia]

30 days, no wine, no junk, lots of exercise?

Hi Beautiful PINKSTERS! At the end of my day day 32 AF. Keepwalking I know what you mean about the urges creeping up on you, if that happens to me I just put myself back into the space of waking up with a hangover and all the other emotions that go with that, I have become so good at doing this I actually feel like vomiting. That puts me back into my place of being AF very quickly!

Barb I am right behind you how good does it feel!!!!

Hi to everyone much love and light sending your way xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

I must go to sleep now sober and happy and happy! On to day 33 tomorrow!!!!

Sarah Jane way to go running through the city I have been a little lazy with that. Just a little tired. But I will be back there into it soon enough!

Tipps how are you? Do you prefer Deb or Tipps? It is always great to be back in your own home. Your home sounds beautiful, country and beside the lake. Can you take a picture of the lake for us?

[Blues Dancer]

30 days, no wine, no junk, lots of exercise?

Hi pinksters. I'm sorry to say that after 40 days I caved and had atwo day bender. Starting over with day 1 today. I feel horrible and can't believe I gave up so much time AF. Will continue on my journey. Havnt been working out or taking care of myself either. Starting over. I will beat this.

[Barbara1234]

30 days, no wine, no junk, lots of exercise?

Good Morning Pinksters,

Keeps, I had a rough time on my day 29-30. I told you guys I almost drank, I came so close. I was standing right outside the liquor dept. in the grocery store glaring at the booze. Then I imagined the taste of AL, thought about Day 1 all over again after all of my work, and left the store.
I know I can't mod. I am done. This is a decision that has been manifesting in me for years. When I think of all the stupid things I had done over the years. Driving drunk, I could have killed someone, or myself. Hiding bottles from my boyfriend in my closet and taking drinks in between my glasses of wine with him, so he didn't really know how much I had. Eating the wrong foods to try and soak up the AL. Once I start drinking, my body does not have an "off switch". This didn't happen over night, it builds up over time. Alcoholism is progressive. Some of you are lucky and you won't get to that point, but some of us do. If you read posts on this site from the 'hard core" drinkers, you can see the progression over the years to the....drinking in the morning, drinking at work, missing events because of hangovers, sabotaging relationships, losing husbands, wives, children.
I remember the depression, the mood swings, the self-loathing. I know I am done.
I own a business. If I get a DUI, my entire life is over. I may as well keep a bottle of valium hidden and kill myself in case that happens, because I will never get my life back. I will lose my license, the entire town will know. If I lose my license, I lose my job, I lose my home. I am not married, there is no other source of income. I would never be able to fix that. My life could change in one second if I let AL back in.
I am learning how to "urge surf" from one of the members here. I am reading, doing hypnosis CD's, anything I can to stay AF. I am literally fighting for my life..
So, I know about the urges creeping in, but I am learning how to overpower them. I figure I either exert energy fighting a hangover, or exert energy fighting an urge to drink.
Sorry for the rambling. Now thinking about AL turns a switch on in me, the on switch to STOP.

[SarahJane]

30 days, no wine, no junk, lots of exercise?

Hi Pinksters,
Blues you did so well doing 40 days- I couldn't even get to 20. The most important thing is that you are back & AF- you will succeed.
Barbara thanks for the insight into your drinking- it really shows the power of alcohol. But we are more powerful than that poison- especially united in pink!
Keeps how are you going with the Clean & Lean Diet? I have ordered it & have beeen looking at it online- it looks perfect for me. Have had such a mad diet history- just need to follow a very healthy program, do loads of exercise & stay off the wine. Simple!
Hope everyone is having a good Monday. I am feeling a bit flat today- think I am tired after the hectic weekend & busy work skedule for next couple of days. Am feeling pulled in too many directions at the moment- have 4 kids on school holidays, loads of work etc. Am feeling the temptation to numb it all with a glass of wine but I know that it will only set me back even more.

[Blues Dancer]

30 days, no wine, no junk, lots of exercise?

Thanks SJ. But I feel absolutely horrible about drinking. I know I shouldn't beat myself up about it, but right now I just feel like the lowest of the low. I had managed to stay AF through many difficult situations. I'm not sure what went wrong. I had out of town guests all week so I was unable to get my workouts in and I couldn't get on MWO. I had been taking antabuse, but discontinued using it as I felt safe and happy and was loving being sober. I guess I will need to sit down and formulate a new plan. Staying close to this thread is paramount to my sobriety. I really thought I had this. The cravings were there but i managed to surf them. I really hate myself right now and I am absolutely terrified that I will never get a hold on this. I was so proud of myself and I just through it all away.

[keepwalking]

30 days, no wine, no junk, lots of exercise?

Tipplerette;1137684 wrote: Glad you didn't cave, Keeps and I totally understand the way it creeps up on you. The first few weeks were so easy for me that I relaxed too much I guess. You are so smart for being vigilant. Keep that antenae up all the time. I can relate to your dilemna about what to do in July. Moderating keeps us focused on the booze; that's the problem with moderating. I almost want to do an experiment and not come to this site for the month of July and to push the "do I drink" or "do I abstain" thoughts from my head for the month just to see if common sense will prevail. It sure beats analyzing every situation and every meal to death. Let me know what you decide to do and I wish you all the best in your decision.

Have a great day everyone

Tips

I certainly will Tips and i know what you mean about the over analysing! Sometimes all this talk about drinking or not drinking gets too much so you do need a break from here, i have been there! I think i am going to go for 20 days in July AF and allow myself 10 A days, moderation still being the aim, I will start a new thread on Friday to see if anyone wants to join me?? I know its so important for some to completely abstain just like Barb described but i have never been a hard core drinker just a girl who can slip into the bad habit of drinking wine every night which i never ever want to do again! More on friday, let me know your thoughts x

[keepwalking]

30 days, no wine, no junk, lots of exercise?

Mia;1137685 wrote: Hi Beautiful PINKSTERS! At the end of my day day 32 AF. Keepwalking I know what you mean about the urges creeping up on you, if that happens to me I just put myself back into the space of waking up with a hangover and all the other emotions that go with that, I have become so good at doing this I actually feel like vomiting. That puts me back into my place of being AF very quickly!

Barb I am right behind you how good does it feel!!!!

Hi to everyone much love and light sending your way xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

I must go to sleep now sober and happy and happy! On to day 33 tomorrow!!!!

Sarah Jane way to go running through the city I have been a little lazy with that. Just a little tired. But I will be back there into it soon enough!


Tipps how are you? Do you prefer Deb or Tipps? It is always great to be back in your own home. Your home sounds beautiful, country and beside the lake. Can you take a picture of the lake for us?

CONGRATULATIONS Mia, Day 33 and you are still FREE!! Thanks for sharing your journey i would never have got to day 28 without the support of the PINKSTERS xxxx

[keepwalking]

30 days, no wine, no junk, lots of exercise?

SarahJane;1137781 wrote: Hi Pinksters,
Blues you did so well doing 40 days- I couldn't even get to 20. The most important thing is that you are back & AF- you will succeed.
Barbara thanks for the insight into your drinking- it really shows the power of alcohol. But we are more powerful than that poison- especially united in pink!
Keeps how are you going with the Clean & Lean Diet? I have ordered it & have beeen looking at it online- it looks perfect for me. Have had such a mad diet history- just need to follow a very healthy program, do loads of exercise & stay off the wine. Simple!
Hope everyone is having a good Monday. I am feeling a bit flat today- think I am tired after the hectic weekend & busy work skedule for next couple of days. Am feeling pulled in too many directions at the moment- have 4 kids on school holidays, loads of work etc. Am feeling the temptation to numb it all with a glass of wine but I know that it will only set me back even more.

SJ i am loving the clean and lean, i have only been following it for a week as i ditched weight watchers as was eating way too much processed stuff even though it was low fat! I feel great on this diet, very healthy indeed, my appetite has reduced because i am eating all the right things and i have become addicted to oatcakes and hummus! Got some smoked salmon pate to have on them for lunch yum - Good luck and let me know how you get on ?? Sorry you feel a bit flat but you were so right not to hit the bottle you would have been flat out and hopefully you are daisy fresh this morning so enjoy your day xx

[keepwalking]

30 days, no wine, no junk, lots of exercise?

Blues Dancer;1137808 wrote: Thanks SJ. But I feel absolutely horrible about drinking. I know I shouldn't beat myself up about it, but right now I just feel like the lowest of the low. I had managed to stay AF through many difficult situations. I'm not sure what went wrong. I had out of town guests all week so I was unable to get my workouts in and I couldn't get on MWO. I had been taking antabuse, but discontinued using it as I felt safe and happy and was loving being sober. I guess I will need to sit down and formulate a new plan. Staying close to this thread is paramount to my sobriety. I really thought I had this. The cravings were there but i managed to surf them. I really hate myself right now and I am absolutely terrified that I will never get a hold on this. I was so proud of myself and I just through it all away.

HI BD and sorry your so scared but i see from your other post that you are feeling much stronger so so thats a blessed relief. You got so much support and brillaint advice on there especially about the fall being part of the recovery! You did 40 days, AMAZING!! keep going and as they said take ODAT, big hug and thanks for being so honest and sharing, it helps us all to stay focused on our goals xx

[keepwalking]

30 days, no wine, no junk, lots of exercise?

Barbara1234;1137277 wrote: Good Morning Pinksters,

I was wondering where everyone is too. This is my favorite thread, the one that helps me the most, so I hope we don't let it die. I noticed that when I don't post, I start to lose the connection, so let's try and keep this one going. You guys are very special to me!
Anyway, the move is sheer hell. Seems the more I do, the more there is to do.....ugh!
Welcome all of our new friends, Glam, hi, and good job with your AF days!!!!! and the cancer walks, they are good for you and the community as well.
Mia, so proud of you, you are right behind me. Feels great doesn't it? I have had the best sleep in over 20 yrs. being AF. Today is day 36! I can't believe it. I haven't had to attend any social things so I feel safe. That is the real test for me.
Tips, Miss O, Blues, SJ, Running, where are you guys?
Hi Daisy, sounds like you are doing well. I know what you mean about your friends only wanting you to be drinking buddies. I had some friends tell me once when I wanted to stop drinking, that they "didn't trust non-drinkers at their events, and I wouldn't be invited in the future". I was devastated because I really didn't have any friends and I wanted to fit in, so I kept drinking. Sad isn't it?
Keeps, I wish I had a bike like yours, I love to ride in the evenings, and you really do connect with nature in a very special way.
I hope everyone is well. I have to get back to it. Right, Mia, my house hasn't been this clean in years. Once I move back in (in a yr. or so) I will start out like it's a new home! The worst part is the garage, I have to have it completely empty for the new Tenant.:egad:

Barb i love your posts, they are so sincere, the one about the reasons for why you cant drink was so powerful and i thank you for it because it is a sharp reminder of the negative impact A has on our lives! I am going to try and mod next month but only ever to celebrate!! Never ever to drown ones sorrows or because i had a bad day, i have some important events coming up and i will see how i go, will explain more on friday. Hope the move is complete now think of all that exercise you will be fit as a fiddle, hope you can treat yourself to a nice massage or something?? xxx

[keepwalking]

30 days, no wine, no junk, lots of exercise?

Day 28 and feeling blinking GREAT!!! Thanks for all your wisdom re the urges creeping up, boy its good to know we all share the same struggle!!! Would never have got this far without coming here every day and reading your posts and sharing so thanks a million pinksters! I know its been a difficult month for all of us and we have lost some along the way, Daisy and Queen B great to get you back i do hope our absent friends are OK????? Have a great day my friends, will log on tonight to check with you all. xxxx

[daisy45]

30 days, no wine, no junk, lots of exercise?

Keepwalking, great to see you feeling so positive this morning. It is infectious.....
Back to day 7 today. I'm not focusing too much on counting each day right now - after my slip at 31 days, it was a bit disheartening but then I look back over the year; I started 'my journey' on 3 October last year and if I look back over that time it has been mostly alcohol-free with quite a few slips in-between.
I feel so much better than I did before I started - there has been continuous improvement in every aspect of my life and I feel very positive. The slips have been an important learning process for me. The last one, only last week, I took in my stride. I had bad news and drank; not great, but shit happens; but my AF days over the past months have given me such a taste for the 'good life' that while I was drinking, I found myself looking forward to being AF again, not because I felt desperate but because I love it so much.
Thats not to say I dont have those 'drinking' thoughts but the pull of the AF life is getting stronger.....hope it stays that way.
Any alcohol free day is a bonus; any day 1 has a lesson; waffle,waffle, haha, but have a great day everyone, whether it be day1 or day 999; as long as we are on this wonderful site, we are on the one road, together! Ha!:l

[Mia]

30 days, no wine, no junk, lots of exercise?

Blues Dancer I am sending you all my love. We have all been there. Dust yourself off and start again which I know you are doing. You did 40 days girl. You should be proud and you know you can do it again. I know you can do it!!!!!!

I stayed sober for 7 years then picked up again and did not stop for the next 20 years. So yep we have all been there xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx You go girlxxxxxxxx

[Tipplerette]

30 days, no wine, no junk, lots of exercise?

KeepWalking,

I will look for your thread on Monday as I leave for a motorcycle trip on Thursday and will not have access to the computer all weekend. I my join you or I may try to wing it on my own. I have to admit that without being on the Pinkster's Bandwagon, I am back to drinking the half bottle most nights. It's so easy to fall back to familiar patterns. The drinktracker is a good tool to use when moderating. Abstaining 20 days out of 31 is a realistic goal. We shall see what July brings.

The house across the street has come for sale. it's on the river as well. It's a bigger bungalow than our wee cottage and the landscaping could be out of a magazine. One hilly acre of beautifully manicured yard. Tons of perennials too. We are probably going to put an offer in. The yard maintenance itself would be a one hour a night job. That might be my salvation. Can't work a lawn tractor while drunk now can I??? We would rent out our beautiful cottage for a few years... we shall see.