~cattleman cafe~ & another 24...

[abcowboy]

I've got breakfast ready for y'all, enjoy!

[dill]

Good morning, everyone. Coffee's on!

As a young person I had a few years on my own before settling down with Mr. D During that time I lived on my own and was very happy and proud about being independent. I wonder sometimes if that experience helps prepare me for one day being on my own again. We shall see, I suppose. Just pondering the question of loneliness.

24 more for all of us here, please and thank you.

[dill]

Cross post, Cowboy. Thanks for another awesome breakfast!

[Rava]

Good morning Cafe. Thanks for a fabulous breakfast Cowboy. Saves me from cooking this morning. Funeral went well yesterday. Not as many people there as what I thought. I am curious if since covid, funerals are becoming more and more obsolete. I for one do not want one. Wonder what peoples thoughts are on this. My dad made it home and it was very apparent that he needs hospice. Probably not going to happen so my best guess is he will fall in his home and end up dying in the hospital. Only time will tell. God getting old sucks big time. It’s scary too. Another cold morning here but hopefully a warmer afternoon. Our kids are coming over for burgers tomorrow afternoon. So I will be going to the store this morning to buy food and make some pasta salad. Wishing everyone a great and sober day. 24 more please and thank you.

[Slo]

That looks like a particularly delicious breakfast, Cowboy!

I too wonder if funerals are becoming obsolete, due to COVID, and also due to people living less rooted in place in one community for an entire lifetime. Certainly, it is more acceptable thankfully to be able to just skip having a funeral.

Rava, it must be particularly painful as a nurse to not be able to advocate for the best care for your father. Hospice support sounds perfect for him. Yes, I find aging to be frightening as well. I hope to go out quickly rather than through protracted aging & illness.

I somehow need to embrace living alone. As I, and if I, can get healthier, then perhaps it would be less overwhelming anyways. Sometimes I think apartment living would be better for me, but that could bring its own issues. I wish one of my daughters…needed my financial contribution so that I could live communally with one of them & their family. But they all like the nuclear family model.

Sounds like you’re getting great weather in western Canada, Mul & Cowboy! It’s nice here too.

Sticking to an AF lifestyle for today & onwards!

[Ginger999]

Yummy breakfast, ABC! Just what I was hoping for this morning. Gorgeous morning for a trip to the farmers market so we shall!

Slo, I hope you find your stride! I assume the divorce was not your doing, which makes it just that much harder but you've got this. You're strong! Hell, if you can dump alcohol, you can do anything!

Rava, I'm so sorry. If they'd put your dad on hospice he could exit that shell of a body so quickly and painlessly. But you know that. Just so sad that he'll probably have to fall first and go through a surgery before he gets to transition. Makes absolutely no sense to me.

Ramping up for my sister trip to Seaview for five days. We leave on Thursday, back the following Wednesday. Can't wait to spend some quality time with them.

Hey Dill, Jude and Mul!

I'll take another day of freedom

[abcowboy]

4:40am in Alberta, another 24 please, and thanks...

In the last 24 hours, these friends have joined in for 24 hours of wellness:
Jude58 dill Rava Slo Ginger999

Today is going to be a darn good day not to drink!

[abcowboy]

I think we all feel lonely at times Slo, but it's not the same as living alone when it's not something you want to do.

It's a tough situation regarding your dad Rava, do you think he's getting the care he needs at home because being able to stay at home might make him happier?

If the weather holds and things do good, we should finish up seeding in about a week, hopefully this will be my last Monday post from the camper lol.

[Jude58]

Happy Memorial day folks! The sun is shining this morning and it is glorious to see as we've had nothing but rain and cool temps for more days than I can count. Yay!

After my divorce I did live alone for a couple of years. I often got lonely but it wasn't too bad because I was working and interacted with people everyday. Slo, have you ever thought of volunteering somewhere? It would get you out of the house and around other people. Just a thought.

Personally, I don't want to have a funeral. I just want to be cremated with no fuss, and I think that more and more people are doing the same. I love the idea that many folks opt to have a celebration of life instead of a funeral. Much more positive I think.

I'm in for another sober day!

[Rava]

Good morning Cafe. Ginger, I hope you have a great sisters trip this year! Jude, glad the weather is cooperating now. It’s cloudy here right now but supposed to clear up today. I talked to my step mother and she has agreed to call hospice tomorrow. I doubt that she means it. There is nothing I can do. I am praying for my dad to go soon. His body is ready but she is not willing to let him go. Sometimes the one that is left behind is the one that makes ridiculous decisions regarding what is the best care. I am continuing to lay low as it’s almost over. Today we are having some of our kids and grandkids over for burgers, fishing and crabbing. Should be a busy but fun day. Slo, I also wonder if a volunteer opportunity would be a good way for you to be around others. Something not physical. You can find lots of opportunities online in your area. Hope everyone has a good Memorial Day. 24 more please and thank you. PS I have a pest company coming tomorrow. We have ants and more ants. I have sprayed and sprayed. UGH.

[Ginger999]

Rava, have you ever tried Terro for your ant issues? I'd keep them around even after the pest guy comes. They aren't spendy and work great around here for sugar ants.

https://www.walmart.com/brand/terro/10023156

ABC, you're almost done! Thank you.

We had a lovely thunder storm last night. This morning things are a sparkling green. Feel bad for the guy below us though. His first cutting of hay is down. Must be over 20 acres. Darn good thing there's a heat spell coming. He'll be turning it today, tomorrow and probably Wednesday too, if he wants to save it.

Cyrus has taken to waking me up at 430a. I'm looking forward to sleeping in on this trip. Lol I'll take another day of freedom!

[dill]

Ginger, I too use Terro liquid ant baits. Worked like a charm for us just last week. The thunderstorm sound like it was good. Your neighbor should be ok if there is dry weather for a few days.

I guess my take on funerals is that I won't be around so I would leave it to my family members to decide what works best for them. I would prefer not to have a viewing, but if that is what they need in order to process things for themselves, then so be it. Also, I would like to be cremated but would like my ashes buried in a cemetery plot. I just asked Mr. D how he feels about having a viewing/funeral and he said he really doesn't want anything. I could live with that, but I do wonder how the kids and grandkids would be able to process things... I guess we'll have to talk about it again sometime soon.

Rava, I hope your stepmom allows hospice to come to the house at the very least. They could help with his care and her ability to learn how to let go.

Jude, I bet being employed did help you cope with the change after you divorced. Did you keep the house or did both of you change your living arrangements? How long before you remarried? Just curious. Don't answer if I'm getting too personal.

Slo, volunteer jobs are a good idea. There are all kinds of them so I bet you could find one to fit your physical limitations.

Cowboy, I hope you get it all done this week!

24 more for all of us please.

[Slo]

I’m home now from D3’s house. I am grappling with how I think I’m family, but they don’t consider me family -just a visitor who is getting in the way of their nuclear family time. I have been trying to pour myself into my grandma role with all these new little ones, but think I need to reconsider and pull back if they don’t want me around. I sure enjoyed time & cuddles with 9-month-old Ayla! And 2 y/o Andy sure enjoyed having Grandma around! But, oh well. While I want a family, this society is set up for work and for nuclear families. So, I will have to change course and distract myself with card games and maybe a painting class. And go visit other adults; leave the young ones alone. I will miss the intense, high quality time with the grands though! But no more inserting myself where I’m not wanted.

I am not ready to volunteer yet. I have a long way to go sorting this foot out. And a long way to go getting my brain back online and sorting all this nerve damage and fatigue out before I am ready to do that.

Jude, did your SIL have a funeral?

Ginger, sounds like that guy has a lot of work ahead drying the hay. Happy for you and your sister vacation!

Cowboy, yes, thank for helping with our food supply. I hope you have a good week in the fields.

Rava, you crab up north too?! Good luck with your fun Memorial day -but busy with hosting -and hope your pasta salad turned out well.

Hi to Dill & Mull too!

[Jude58]

Good morning cafe!

Slo, no my sil did not want a funeral. She just wanted to be cremated and at a later date have family and friends come to a celebration of life party. Personally, that's what I would do as well.

Dill, after my divorce I lived in an apartment for about a year before buying a house out in the country. I met Mr. J in 2005 and we were married in 2009. My ex kept the house, but eventually remarried and moved to another city. We are still friends though which is really nice.

Rava, I hope that your step mother comes to her senses and calls hospice today. They were wonderful in caring for my sil towards the end.

I'm in for another 24 hours of peace...

[Rava]

Good morning Cafe. Slo, I am sorry your weekend left you feeling like an outsider. The kids probably loved you there. We are still having an ant problem. I have tried Terro traps and they work pretty well in Florida. Problem here is that I think they are in the wall. I have called an exterminator and decided to start a quarterly spraying. I don’t like ants, spiders or any other creepy crawlers. So this problem will be over soon! My stepmother agreed to call hospice today. I doubt she will and like I said it wont be much longer. I basically told her that since he wants to die at home this is his best option. The only other option is that he falls at home and ends up dying in the hospital. He has become very belligerent and since he can’t take care of himself he needs to listen and get hospice involved. Stubborn old man issues! Our little cookout turned out well. All the grands love a golf cart. We caught a few crabs that were too small to keep and about 100 minnows which we let go. It’s all about making memories with the kids. Memories that don’t include spending money! Ok heading to exercise class. Hope everyone has a great Tuesday. 24 more please and thank you.