Newbies Nest

[Battle_for_the_sun]

Re: Newbies Nest

Going through some stuff right now, having to type this with one hand, my left arm is a whole mess and I've still got the early-sobriety insomnia - 3 hours sleep, a lot of painkillers and one working arm/hand, I'm still AF but pretty out of it - not by choice, I'd be non-functional without, nerve pain is a vicious thing. Stressing about getting another prescription sent to the doctor tomorrow, trying to make sure I'm available to take a phone call - they said they'd have a prescription for at least more of the same pain meds for me today but it didn't materialise, the stress is making it worse. I went through it before, a whole year with one arm working, miserable experience, pretty much imploded, went to some real dark places, don't want to end up back there again. I'm in a better place besides the injury than I was last time but this is a nasty trigger for me.

[NoSugar]

Re: Newbies Nest

Love the term 'sin-eater' :excitement:. The thing is, everyone seems to think it is the others that have sinned! Whiny victims totally wear me out. And the inability to look at things from someone else's perspective baffles me. I am getting better at stating outright that I'm not getting in the middle. Battle, I told my husband that I wanted to move to Hawaii. And failing that, I wanted to get Covid and have to be ISOLATED. (Luckily, I'm out of my funk!)

Wags, I know my mom would not have chosen to live as she did the last few years of her life. I joke (sort of) to friends that I wish we were all issued 1 cyanide pill to use when needed. She would have taken hers years ago. At least I was able to convince my dad and sister that we shouldn't allow heroic measures to extend her life. I hope your dad is at peace during however much more time he has.

I woke up to a thunderstorm this morning. Very odd here. It should be snowing instead. And apparently it is snowing in southern CA, where it essentially never snows. Weird world these days.

[wagmor]

Re: Newbies Nest

NS - love the shirt! Thanks for sharing how things went with your mom over her last few years. I can't imagine my dad living even one more year. Like, I'm pretty sure he doesn't want that at all.

Hellos and waves to Lav and Battle and everyone else stopping by the nest.

[Battle_for_the_sun]

Re: Newbies Nest

Don't envy you NS - that used to be my job - no family for 5 years now, its peaceful.

Contacted GP this morning, they'll either call, text or email me on Thursday to either talk to me or tell me what they're gonna do, half the time its not what i want and I have to do another form and wait another 3 working days and hope the do-over is better. In the mean time pain continues. Gotta make sure I'm able to answer the phone any time they call between 9-6, pain in the ass with work/driving/life.

[Lavande]

Re: Newbies Nest

Good evening Nesters,

We did have some quick rain today with the possibility of damaging winds. Nothing like that happened here but a tornado did some damage in NJ, sad. Such a strange winter we’ve had & now those crazy spring/summer storms are starting up, geez.

Battle, sure hope you get the help you need soon. Nerve pain is the worst. Take good care of yourself :hug:

Wags, it’s always nice to find support, online or in person. Sharing ideas can be very helpful as we all know. Sending you loads of strength for you & your dad.

NS, so you are the family ‘sin eater’? I’ve been in that position myself, still am to a certain extent. I always shake my head & wonder WHY people just don’t take care of their own sh*t & leave me out of their messes. Love the T shirt idea, maybe I should stitch that on some pillows too . Protect your energy & don’t let yourself be drawn into the drama of others.

Hello to all & wishing everyone a safe night in the nest!
Lav

[NoSugar]

Re: Newbies Nest

Every time you make it through a challenge like this, Battle, you're stronger than before. When some stress comes up you can look back and think, well I didn't drink when I was going crazy from pain and this isn't worse than that, so I know I don't have to drink. Hang in there. xx

Wags, I'm so sorry to hear about your dad. We lost my mom mentally slowly over several years but especially over the last 3. It was a very long good-bye and it is hard and heartbreaking. Enjoy the moments when you can really connect with him. Towards the end I finally realized the best thing for me to do was just enter her world and stay there in the moment with her with no expectation she would remember anything we talked about. I forced myself not to suggest by my face or words that she had just told me something for the fifth time but tried to respond appropriately (surprise, dismay, agreement, whatever) each time as if it were the first time I heard it. I hope it was good for her for us to interact this way and I know it was good for me.

TJ, it still blows my mind that accountability to some people I met online and didn't even know by their real names was finally the thing that worked. Being a people-pleaser, I didn't want to disappoint those who had invested so much time and me. Those attachments helped me get to the place where I could be accountable to myself. Later, when I tried to help people, I was motivated not to be a hypocrite who said one thing and did another. These connections really matter.

We had a bunch of family drama this weekend and I always seem to get in the middle of it b/c I'm the one they tell (some more nicely than others) what is wrong. I was grateful to be in my right mind, not saying something I would regret later or trying to fix things that I can't fix. Yesterday I went w/ a friend to a consignment shop and found a tee shirt that said: Today I'll be talking only to my dog. I'll be wearing it strategically from now on!

[wagmor]

Re: Newbies Nest

Battle - great job staying AF, but sorry to hear about your pain. I feel for you and I can relate due to similar experiences. I hope you're able to find something that brings you relief soon.

Lav - cloudy here too, and maybe a snowstorm later this week. Ready for Spring!


Had a good productive day here, got several major things off my to-do list, and feeling a bit less overwhelmed. I also joined a group for people who are "parenting aging parents" and I think that'll be good support to have.

Here's hoping we all have great weeks ahead!

[Battle_for_the_sun]

Re: Newbies Nest

Evening,

Rough day. The painkillers I was taking for off-label purposes were prescribed to me for legitimate nerve pain which has hit me with a vengeance today. I'm trying to contact my GP in the morning for some alternatives but have had to give in and take a pill to be able to function/not cry. Still AF, studying hard and everything else is going ok, just difficult to deal with, hopefully I'll get something else prescribed but given how my doctors run it'll be a while before I get any help.

[Lavande]

Re: Newbies Nest

Monday evening greetings Nesters,

Cloudy here tonight, waiting for some rain I think.

Wags, I know the feeling about those stores & I haven’t stepped into any of them in almost 14 years now. It all seems like another lifetime, it’s history now. I have wondered if they missed me, Lol
There are so many reasons to remain grateful for our quits & staying away from the booze stores is just one of them. Hope you are well.

@Battle, how are you doing?

Hello to all & wishing everyone a safe night in the nest!
Lav

[wagmor]

Re: Newbies Nest

Hi all, seems like a reasonably good weekend for nesters near and far, even if some challenges. Hanging in there myself. Unexpectedly had today completely off, and used it to get a few tasks/errands done and to relax a bit. During errands we walked past a store/building that used to be one of the several liquor stores I would rotate through in a pathetic attempt to make my heavy drinking less obvious. That liquor store has closed sometime in the past few years but it still felt good to walk by and feel nothing but disgust - not for the store workers, but for my drinking self and for al.

So glad I don't drink. It would just make things harder.

[Lavande]

Re: Newbies Nest

Greetings Nesters,

Just home from a concert we really enjoyed ‘Tower of Power’. That’s a band that formed in 1968 they still have 3 of the original members, wow!

Battle, glad you’re feeling good

Wishing everyone a safe night in the nest!
Lav

[Battle_for_the_sun]

Re: Newbies Nest

Evening all, studying hard today, really enjoying it, hoping I can keep up this pace, a lot easier sober. Having ups and downs as you'd expect, but feeling better about it this time.

[Lavande]

Re: Newbies Nest

Good evening Nesters,

Feeling more like February should, I did enjoy the brief warmup though

Battle, that’s very cool about the music festival. Go & enjoy & prove to yourself you can do it entirely sober & still have a good time. We all had a first time doing things newly sober, I smile now thinking about that

TJ, I am grateful the forum is still around all these years later & not just for us. There’s plenty of newbies out in the world who haven’t found us yet but hopefully we can squeeze them into the nest & give them a hand. 10 years does kinda fly by, don’t you think?

Ava, I got my last Covid booster in September along with my flu shot. If they come out with more boosters, i’ll get them too. We were lucky that we didn’t get awfully sick.
Glad to hear Carl is feeling well post op. Is Bindi on daily insulin? Sounds like it’s time. Good luck!

Hello to all & wishing everyone a safe night in the nest!
Lav

[available]

Re: Newbies Nest

Evening nesters

STeady the heat was horrendous, 42 celcius my way but thankfully i bought the portable air con out of the garage and set it up. the fur babies and I managed to get through those two days of hell.

Lav, the tireds with covid for me were horrendous, took me weeks to get over and throw in some brain fog. I am glad you got an easy covid. We have a 5th vax available now but i cant get it as have to wait 6 months as i had covid in december.

TJ, i knew also that i had to stick on here like glue in the early days as otherwise left to my own devices, i knew i would fail dismally and i did relapse a few times until a bit of pressure from NS to pick a quit date had me up and moving forward, also having Pav as a quit buddy helped enormously. I never regret being "lunatic Linda" in those early days and i have never regretted persevering to get sober and stay that way. Hard to believe its now 10 years plus for a lot of us and we are still being accountable.

NS, i hope you can avoid covid. the hospital is just starting to allow everyone to not wear masks (except in wards etc) and its funny seeing workmates faces again.

Battle, glad to see you back on track. i think i relapsed about three times before it stuck. Mind you i had good excuses to drink, my daughter was getting married so i had lots of parties and god forbid i could not drink. i didnt think i could not drink and have a good time but the bonus of time showed me different. That is excellent Battle that you get to a music festival for free. Its good to focus on the positives.

Carl is doing quite well with his knee, i now put him on the bed with his lead tied to the bedhead. left him the other day thinking he was not going anywhere and next thing i knew, he was out the backyard with me. mmm so back to the crate he went for a couple of days. he doesnt seem to have done any damage. Bindi is going to see a diabetic specialist as her glucose levels are sky high and she was so unwell the other day as she had ketones that were off the grid with the urine stick test. funny how you learn stuff you didnt have a damn idea about before.

Coffee with a friend tomorrow so that will be nice, i just need to not buy anything, see how that goes.

take care xx

[TJAF]

Re: Newbies Nest

Lav, in those early days I really needed to be accountable to someone. I was quitting in the shadows and I knew from countless tries that I could never be accountable to myself. So, after really struggling for a week I stumbled onto this forum and what do you know folks like you, no Sugar, Available Byrdie, Kensho and many others became my sounding board. More importantly, you were the folks I held myself accountable to. Here we are 10 years later. Feels pretty big. I've stayed away after awhile but with 10 years knocking on the door I figured its my turn to give back